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Old 09-25-2005, 09:00 AM  
Frankie Frankie is offline
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Clean jokes can be funny too!
Or at least good for a chuckle. Here's something completely different (for this BB). This thread is dedicated to ONLY CLEAN JOKES. Please post any clean joke that you find funny or at least amusing. We will not call you "dorks." Not in this thread. Let's see what you've got,... and share them.

Don't worry about repeat jokes. Nobody has time to check all posts.
Last edited by Frankie; 07-10-2011 at 05:17 PM..
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Frankie is too fat/Omaha.Frankie is too fat/Omaha.Frankie is too fat/Omaha.Frankie is too fat/Omaha.Frankie is too fat/Omaha.Frankie is too fat/Omaha.Frankie is too fat/Omaha.Frankie is too fat/Omaha.Frankie is too fat/Omaha.Frankie is too fat/Omaha.Frankie is too fat/Omaha.
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Old 02-17-2017, 09:19 AM   #766
ThaVirus ThaVirus is offline
You gotta kill a few people
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mikey23545 View Post
The LAPD, The FBI, and the CIA are all trying to prove that they are the best at apprehending criminals. The President decides to give them a test. He releases a rabbit into a forest and each of them has to catch it.

The CIA goes in. They place animal informants throughout the forest. They question all plant and mineral witnesses. After three months of extensive investigations they conclude that rabbits do not exist.

The FBI goes in. After two weeks with no leads they burn the forest, killing everything in it, including the rabbit, and they make no apologies. The rabbit had it coming.

The LAPD goes in. They come out two hours later with a badly beaten bear. The bear is yelling: "Okay! Okay! I'm a rabbit! I'm a rabbit!'
Hmm.. I actually don't get this one..
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Old 02-17-2017, 03:32 PM   #767
Msmith Msmith is offline
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Rodney King?
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Msmith has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.Msmith has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.Msmith has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.Msmith has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.Msmith has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.Msmith has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.Msmith has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.Msmith has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.Msmith has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.Msmith has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.Msmith has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.
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Old 02-17-2017, 05:26 PM   #768
Dave Lane Dave Lane is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ThaVirus View Post
Hmm.. I actually don't get this one..
About the use of torture...
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Old 02-17-2017, 05:30 PM   #769
In58men In58men is offline
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Why didn't Anne Frank finish her diary?

Spoiler!
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Old 02-18-2017, 03:15 PM   #770
Pueblo Chieftan Pueblo Chieftan is offline
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Hey All, new member here...


So, I was in a cab today and the cab driver said, "I love my job, I'm my own boss. Nobody tells me what to do..."Then I said, "turn Left."
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Pueblo Chieftan < Tried to steal Andy's chili fries.Pueblo Chieftan < Tried to steal Andy's chili fries.Pueblo Chieftan < Tried to steal Andy's chili fries.Pueblo Chieftan < Tried to steal Andy's chili fries.Pueblo Chieftan < Tried to steal Andy's chili fries.Pueblo Chieftan < Tried to steal Andy's chili fries.Pueblo Chieftan < Tried to steal Andy's chili fries.Pueblo Chieftan < Tried to steal Andy's chili fries.Pueblo Chieftan < Tried to steal Andy's chili fries.Pueblo Chieftan < Tried to steal Andy's chili fries.Pueblo Chieftan < Tried to steal Andy's chili fries.
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Old 02-20-2017, 01:48 AM   #771
RippedmyFlesh RippedmyFlesh is offline
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If someone from the 1950s suddenly appeared, what would be the most difficult thing to explain about life today? One answer: “I possess a device in my pocket that is capable of accessing the entirety of information known to man. I use it to look at pictures of cats and get into arguments with strangers.”
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RippedmyFlesh wants to die in a aids tree fire.RippedmyFlesh wants to die in a aids tree fire.RippedmyFlesh wants to die in a aids tree fire.RippedmyFlesh wants to die in a aids tree fire.RippedmyFlesh wants to die in a aids tree fire.RippedmyFlesh wants to die in a aids tree fire.RippedmyFlesh wants to die in a aids tree fire.RippedmyFlesh wants to die in a aids tree fire.RippedmyFlesh wants to die in a aids tree fire.RippedmyFlesh wants to die in a aids tree fire.RippedmyFlesh wants to die in a aids tree fire.
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Old 02-20-2017, 10:04 AM   #772
ThaVirus ThaVirus is offline
You gotta kill a few people
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Msmith View Post
Rodney King?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dave Lane View Post
About the use of torture...
Ah, thanks. I was born in '89 so that was a bit before my time.
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Old 02-21-2017, 08:52 AM   #773
Chaunceythe3rd Chaunceythe3rd is offline
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Did you hear about the constipated mathematician? He worked it out with a pencil.
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Old 02-21-2017, 11:56 AM   #774
scho63 scho63 is online now
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Why aren’t koalas actual bears?

The don’t meet the koalafications.
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Old 02-21-2017, 11:56 AM   #775
scho63 scho63 is online now
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Why dont blind people skydive?

Because it scares the crap out of their dogs.
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Old 02-21-2017, 08:32 PM   #776
Kman34 Kman34 is offline
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Did you hear about the new Pirate movie???


It's rated Arrrrrrrr!!!!
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Old 02-21-2017, 08:44 PM   #777
Bowser Bowser is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ThaVirus View Post
I was born in '89
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Old 02-21-2017, 08:48 PM   #778
Baby Lee Baby Lee is offline
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Originally Posted by ThaVirus View Post
Ah, thanks. I was born in '89 so that was a bit before my time.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bowser View Post
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Old 02-21-2017, 08:52 PM   #779
Bowser Bowser is offline
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Old 02-21-2017, 09:11 PM   #780
Chiefshrink Chiefshrink is offline
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There were 2 wealthy brothers who owned pretty much all of a small town.

Problem was that most of their wealth was ill-gotten dishonest gain from all the townspeople. To say the least they were not liked at all.

One day one of the brothers die.

The other living brother sets up the funeral process and goes to the only church in town and say's to the pastor, "Look, you know my brother and I were not above board and illegally ripped off this town and we hardly attended your church. But I need you to say in my brother's eulogy that he was a saint ! The pastor refused but the brother kept insisting and then threw the pastor a potential bone by telling him that he noticed that his church was raising $ for the church building fund and he would provide the rest of the $$ what was needed for their goal IF only the pastor would say that his brother was a saint. The pastor thought about it a long time and then said Okay !!

The day of the funeral arrives and the pastor begins the eulogy and does just the opposite of what he agreed with the brother telling the whole town how this deceased brother was so corrupt, adulterous, mentioning every transgression and sin this deceased brother committed in his life. The living brother was just taken back and couldn't believe what the pastor was doing and began motioning to the pastor off to the side, to cut it off !! The pastor did and ended with this last statement.

"But compared to his living brother this guy was a saint !!!
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