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Old 05-15-2016, 07:51 AM   Topic Starter
Bwana Bwana is offline
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Location: Billings, Montana
Stupid Tourist Tricks



It's off to a fast start already this year! A list of incidents involving people trying to obtain the coveted Darwin Award. I will keep you up to date of all the stupid tourist tricks.

This yesterday: We thought it was cold! (this is a first)
http://www.ktvq.com/story/31975424/y...ed-it-was-cold



How this lady lived and was not gored is beyond me: Buy a Powerball ticket lady:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zfk1O9_quxs

This from last week: Amazing no one got taken out:
http://www.krtv.com/story/31915893/v...nal-park-video

Much of the time, this is what happens: Fat guy vs Bison https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PNvTHOrTf_Y

At this rate, it should be a record year for goring incidents, Chinese tourists seem particularly clueless. So far no goring's, but it's coming.

If you have any from your area, post them up.

Last edited by Bwana; 06-08-2016 at 06:56 AM..
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Old 05-15-2016, 08:17 AM   #2
lewdog lewdog is offline
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Where were the tourists from that picked up the bison? My friends on Facebook from Montana were having a field with it. So hilarious.
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Old 05-15-2016, 08:21 AM   #3
Bwana Bwana is offline
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Originally Posted by lewdog View Post
Where were the tourists from that picked up the bison? My friends on Facebook from Montana were having a field with it. So hilarious.
It didn't say, but the Chinese tourists have been on a roll so far. I'll keep you posted as more information comes out. My guess is that thing pissed all over the inside of the rental, I would guess there will be a bit of a penalty fee upon returning the rig. "Sir, we are going to have to charge you $1500.00 for the Bison wizz in the back of the minivan!"

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Old 05-15-2016, 08:35 AM   #4
lewdog lewdog is offline
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Originally Posted by Bwana View Post
It didn't say, but the Chinese tourists have been on a roll so far. I'll keep you posted as more information comes out. My guess is that thing pissed all over the inside of the rental, I would guess there will be a bit of a penalty fee upon returning the rig. "Sir, we are going to have to charge you $1500.00 for the Bison wizz in the back of the minivan!"


Bison wizz!

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Old 05-15-2016, 08:54 AM   #5
Bwana Bwana is offline
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Bison wizz!

It turned into an expensive trip quickly for the confused tourists. I'll be interested to find out what the dollar amount of the fine was after they showed up with a bison in the back of the minivan at the ranger station. I thought I had see it all regarding tourist's until reading that story this morning.

I mean you know there is going to be numerous goring's "because bison look slow, stupid, seem tame and after all, it is a National park" AKA a big petting zoo in some people's minds. "Worst case scenario, we could outrun that big fat thing, break out the selfie stick and lets stand next to it!" What's even more amazing to me is the people that stalk a grizzly for the close up shot and get the Tim Treadwell treatment.

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Old 05-15-2016, 02:35 PM   #6
Buehler445 Buehler445 is online now
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It didn't say, but the Chinese tourists have been on a roll so far. I'll keep you posted as more information comes out. My guess is that thing pissed all over the inside of the rental, I would guess there will be a bit of a penalty fee upon returning the rig. "Sir, we are going to have to charge you $1500.00 for the Bison wizz in the back of the minivan!"
GOTTA be the Chinese.

One of the excursions on our cruise for our honeymoon was a bus tour of Catalina island. It wasn't bad. Got to see the sights, some interesting shit. A little perplexing because the island is all about returning it to original ecology after the pigs and goat infestation and the bald eagle ddt thing but they're TOTALLY cool with buffalo even though they aren't indigenous.

Anyway. There were a bunch of Chinese tourists and they totally melted down about the buffalo. They were little specs on the horizon and they were freaking out. Making the dude back up and shit. I'd never seen anything like it.

So then the next year we went to Rushmore and down through the preserves there. And there were Chinese tourists blocking mother****ing traffic to take pictures of ... You guessed it. ****ing buffalo. Wife and I were epic pissed.

So now it's a running joke between us that any time there is stupid shit happening we tell each other there must be buffalo around LOL.

Hell of it is there is a feedlot here that, at least at the time had 15,000 or so buffalo being fed out. Plus there is a herd on grass of a hundred or so. There is no way I could give less of a shit about buffalo. Unless of course I get to see one light one of these ****ers up.
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Old 05-16-2016, 01:12 PM   #7
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Anyway. There were a bunch of Chinese tourists and they totally melted down about the buffalo. They were little specs on the horizon and they were freaking out. Making the dude back up and shit. I'd never seen anything like it.
We went on a trip several years ago where we went to some of the NPs in Utah (Bryce, Zion) and then the Grand Canyon. When you are in Zion NP, you have to take a bus down the valley, with stops along the way where you get out to see the sights and then just catch the next bus when you are ready to go on.

Anyway, we are on the bus which is overcrowded with mainly Asian tourists. The bus stops suddenly because there is a deer along the roadway. I thought the bus was going to tip over the way they all rushed over to that side of the bus to see the deer. We sat there for quite awhile while they snapped pictures and cooed over this scraggly mule deer.

Then, when we were leaving the Grand Canyon NP, traffic suddenly comes to a halt because there are some elk along the roadway and this guy just stops his car in the middle of the road to see them. He then jumps out of the car with what I assume is his 7-8 year old daughter so they can try to pet this full sized elk.
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Old 05-16-2016, 02:23 PM   #8
Valiant Valiant is offline
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Originally Posted by Buehler445 View Post
GOTTA be the Chinese.

One of the excursions on our cruise for our honeymoon was a bus tour of Catalina island. It wasn't bad. Got to see the sights, some interesting shit. A little perplexing because the island is all about returning it to original ecology after the pigs and goat infestation and the bald eagle ddt thing but they're TOTALLY cool with buffalo even though they aren't indigenous.

Anyway. There were a bunch of Chinese tourists and they totally melted down about the buffalo. They were little specs on the horizon and they were freaking out. Making the dude back up and shit. I'd never seen anything like it.

So then the next year we went to Rushmore and down through the preserves there. And there were Chinese tourists blocking mother****ing traffic to take pictures of ... You guessed it. ****ing buffalo. Wife and I were epic pissed.

So now it's a running joke between us that any time there is stupid shit happening we tell each other there must be buffalo around LOL.

Hell of it is there is a feedlot here that, at least at the time had 15,000 or so buffalo being fed out. Plus there is a herd on grass of a hundred or so. There is no way I could give less of a shit about buffalo. Unless of course I get to see one light one of these ****ers up.
I get it, they do not have any bison there. When I was doing my thesis in college I came across some old photos of some herds in the plains. There were millions of bison in the photo. Millions it was insane. They were like squirrels. I think they said 30-40million bison at one time was the largest of the population.

Missouri has a decent population.
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Old 05-16-2016, 02:11 PM   #9
Valiant Valiant is offline
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Originally Posted by Bwana View Post
It didn't say, but the Chinese tourists have been on a roll so far. I'll keep you posted as more information comes out. My guess is that thing pissed all over the inside of the rental, I would guess there will be a bit of a penalty fee upon returning the rig. "Sir, we are going to have to charge you $1500.00 for the Bison wizz in the back of the minivan!"
I was reading a news article that I think it is Greece will be importing Chinese police to help control Chinese tourists since they love doing dumb shit and damaging priceless landmarks.

Chinese people are doing their best to keep the worst national tourist mantle.
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Old 05-17-2016, 08:04 AM   #10
kcchiefsus kcchiefsus is offline
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I was reading a news article that I think it is Greece will be importing Chinese police to help control Chinese tourists since they love doing dumb shit and damaging priceless landmarks.

Chinese people are doing their best to keep the worst national tourist mantle.
Living in Korea I've encountered my fair share of ignorant Chinese tourists. Koreans can give them a run for their money when it comes to doing stupid shit though.
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Old 05-15-2016, 08:33 AM   #11
kcpasco kcpasco is offline
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I'd like to see them try and save a grizzly cub they think is cold.
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Old 05-15-2016, 08:36 AM   #12
Bwana Bwana is offline
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I'd like to see them try and save a grizzly cub they think is cold.
The way things have been going, it honestly wouldn't surprise me.
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Old 05-15-2016, 08:35 AM   #13
Dave Lane Dave Lane is offline
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Then there is this idiot. Rock climbing at 3am

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Old 05-15-2016, 09:52 AM   #14
Donger Donger is online now
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Heh. Reminds of the tourists who get out of their cars to feed the Bighorn sheep here, particularly on Mt. Evans. It's a loooong way down, flatlander.
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Old 05-15-2016, 10:27 AM   #15
POND_OF_RED POND_OF_RED is offline
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This brings back a lot of memories. Used to give park tours through Yellowstone and I don't miss it one bit. Tourists are the worst there. We had quite a few guests that actually thought that bear spray was like bug spray that they should spray on themselves as some sort of bear repellant. I really wish I didn't have to correct them sometimes just to see them do it
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