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Old 04-28-2022, 10:23 AM  
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The Franchise's Final Mock Draft
We'll probably move around a lot more but I'm only projecting one trade up right now.

Chiefs trade #29, #103 and a 2023 4th round pick to the Patriots for pick #21
.
1 (21) - George Karlaftis, DE, Purdue - Day one starter at DE. Obviously has a higher floor and a lower ceiling but I think if you maximize his potential....he's an 8-10 sack per year SDE.

1 (30) - Kyler Gordon, CB, Washington - He's a perfect fit for what Spags wants his CBs to be. I think he'll surprise everyone and start from day 1. Gordon and Fenton on the outside with Snead in the slot.

2 (50) - Travis Jones, DT, UConn
2 (62) - Jalen Tolbert, WR, South Alabama
3 (94) - Josh Williams, CB, Fayetville State
4 (121) - JT Woods, S, Baylor
4 (135) - Erik Ezukanma, WR, Texas Tech
7 (234) - James Houston IV, LB/DE, Jackson State
7 (243) - Gerrit Prince, TE, UAB
7 (251) - Ryan Van Dermark, OT, UConn
7 (260) - Shermari Jones, RB, Coastal Carolina

Karlaftis is your starter at DE with Houston being a chess piece that you can move around. I think we still sign that veteran DE after the draft to round out that defensive end group.
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Old 04-28-2022, 11:08 AM   #46
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It wasn't any more expensive than the peleton if I recall. Or at least not prohibitively so. Something like 750 vs 900 I think?

The nice thing is it doesn't take up space. I mean we could've gotten rid of the treadmill but I need that stupid thing to put the damn rottweiler on when he won't calm the hell down and it's raining or cold outside. Damn spaz dog will sprint around the house then go jump on the thing and stare at me until I set it to an incline and run him for 5 miles.
I thought those things were like $2k.
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Old 04-28-2022, 11:08 AM   #47
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I mean, he's a dentist. You'd be grumpy too if your hands were in the mouths of Southwest Missouri's finest all day, err day.
We're hours away from Jameson Williams being a chief, I'm happy as ****.
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Old 04-28-2022, 11:10 AM   #48
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I thought those things were like $2k.
Looks like it's $1,350 for one at the moment. Shipped and 'installed' (i.e. a guy shows up with a screw gun and mounts a single bracket on the wall).

I'm pretty sure it was cheaper when we bought it a year ago but hell I dunno. I was gonna get that college ass back that she had when she was on the dance team. Cost was of secondary concern.
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Old 04-28-2022, 11:11 AM   #49
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We're hours away from Jameson Williams being a chief, I'm happy as ****.
I need to come down there and have you put your hands in my mouth.

I ****ing hate going to the dentist, might as well both of us be grumpy.
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Old 04-28-2022, 11:12 AM   #50
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We're hours away from Jameson Williams being a chief, I'm happy as ****.
The amount of reeruned Chiefs fans who want to trade up for a WR is too damn high!
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Old 04-28-2022, 11:12 AM   #51
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We're hours away from Jameson Williams being a chief, I'm happy as ****.
I've come to a horrifying realization.

I don't really want to trade up to 15ish to get him.

But I REALLY don't want the Chargers to stand pat and get him at 17. And that would just be the most Charger goddamn thing to ever happen. Every year some guy slides 5 picks longer than he should, falls to them and everyone's like "What a home run selection!!!" as though any one of us wouldn't have sprinted up there to take Derwin James or Rashawn Slater.

Can somebody make things difficult for the Chargers in the first round? Ever? Please?
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Old 04-28-2022, 11:13 AM   #52
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I need to come down there and have you put your hands in my mouth.

I ****ing hate going to the dentist, might as well both of us be grumpy.
Come on down. Make it a late appt and we'll crack a bottle of bourbon after.
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Old 04-28-2022, 11:13 AM   #53
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Originally Posted by DJ's left nut View Post
I've come to a horrifying realization.

I don't really want to trade up to 15ish to get him.

But I REALLY don't want the Chargers to stand pat and get him at 17. And that would just be the most Charger goddamn thing to ever happen. Every year some guy slides 5 picks longer than he should, falls to them and everyone's like "What a home run selection!!!" as though any one of us wouldn't have sprinted up there to take Derwin James or Rashawn Slater.

Can somebody make things difficult for the Chargers in the first round? Ever? Please?
If he falls....there's no way the Eagles pass on him at 15. Hell....I'm not even sure the Texans pass on him at 13.
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Old 04-28-2022, 11:13 AM   #54
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Originally Posted by OnTheWarpath15 View Post
I need to come down there and have you put your hands in my mouth.

I ****ing hate going to the dentist, might as well both of us be grumpy.
You try the little sonic scraper water gun thing they have instead of the medieval hook?

Hundreds of years of advances in knowledge of the importance of dental hygiene and those guys are still just scraping shit with sharpened spears.

The sonic cleaner thing is way better.
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Old 04-28-2022, 11:14 AM   #55
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I've come to a horrifying realization.

I don't really want to trade up to 15ish to get him.

But I REALLY don't want the Chargers to stand pat and get him at 17. And that would just be the most Charger goddamn thing to ever happen. Every year some guy slides 5 picks longer than he should, falls to them and everyone's like "What a home run selection!!!" as though any one of us wouldn't have sprinted up there to take Derwin James or Rashawn Slater.

Can somebody make things difficult for the Chargers in the first round? Ever? Please?
Uh, yeah. Wouldn't be ideal.

I want the Chiefs to go up and get him just to see Pest's head explode
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Old 04-28-2022, 11:16 AM   #56
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Uh, yeah. Wouldn't be ideal.

I want the Chiefs to go up and get him just to see Pest's head explode
You're probably going to be disappointed. I'd be pissed for all of 5 seconds.

That is unless he trades both of those first rounders to do it. Then **** Brett Veach.
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Old 04-28-2022, 11:17 AM   #57
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Come on down. Make it a late appt and we'll crack a bottle of bourbon after.
Sounds like a plan. I'll check the wife's schedule - pretty sure she has a SpringVegas trip coming up for work - might as well do it then for the work subsidized hotel room.
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Old 04-28-2022, 11:18 AM   #58
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You're probably going to be disappointed. I'd be pissed for all of 5 seconds.

That is unless he trades both of those first rounders to do it. Then **** Brett Veach.
I'd be annoyed if it were something like a 1st and 2nd this year, a 2nd or 3rd next year. That would be stout and really put a damper on what we can do from a depth perspective on the DL, IMO.

That said, I'd get over it. Fairly quickly, in fact.

Because while I'm not an enormous Williams fan (most of his highlights are him running downfield with nobody within 5 yards of him), I do recognize that the kid is (was?) an insane athlete and has incredible potential in this offense.

So I'd eventually talk myself into it.
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Old 04-28-2022, 11:18 AM   #59
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You try the little sonic scraper water gun thing they have instead of the medieval hook?

Hundreds of years of advances in knowledge of the importance of dental hygiene and those guys are still just scraping shit with sharpened spears.

The sonic cleaner thing is way better.
My buddy thats a root canal specialist was talking about his ultrasonic tip that can be used to "explore" nerve chambers for extra canals in a root canal system.

Thought I'd give it a try.

They're pretty aggressive and I ended up thru the side of the tooth. It was cracked and we were gonna extract it anyway but I wanted to try this first. It didn't work.

My reaction

via GIPHY
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Old 04-28-2022, 11:19 AM   #60
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Originally Posted by DJ's left nut View Post
I've come to a horrifying realization.

I don't really want to trade up to 15ish to get him.

But I REALLY don't want the Chargers to stand pat and get him at 17. And that would just be the most Charger goddamn thing to ever happen. Every year some guy slides 5 picks longer than he should, falls to them and everyone's like "What a home run selection!!!" as though any one of us wouldn't have sprinted up there to take Derwin James or Rashawn Slater.

Can somebody make things difficult for the Chargers in the first round? Ever? Please?
and yet, what good does it do them?
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