For those with children: Do you think you’re a better parent than your parents were?

[seclark]

I was a better parent than my parents.
And my kids are better parents than me.
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[ThaVirus]

Originally Posted by phisherman

My parents were OK but a bit distant in a lot of ways, especially my dad.

I'm getting better at connecting to both of my kids, especially my son. I have a lot in common with my daughter in terms of interests and hobbies so her and my connection has been fairly easy. My son is a different story and it most likely does start with the way my dad was towards me. He wanted nothing to do with emotion and feelings; if he was hurt in some way, it tended to come out in either silence or rage. I have the same tendencies but I want to get better (and so does my wife, she grew up with a similar dad) and with some work, I have. I still pop at times but I'm way quicker to walk away/apologize/etc.

It's been hard but it's worth it and I believe the future for both of my kids will reflect that. It's definitely a marathon and not a sprint.

My dad was the same.

The universe gave me a daughter first, I think, to soften me up.

[Spott]

I was actually present, unlike my Dad, so I know I’m better than he was. I raised one all by myself with no assistance from the mother, including no child support. That makes me half as good as my Mom who raised two on her own with no help.

[ToxSocks]

Originally Posted by Spott

I was actually present, unlike my Dad, so I know I’m better than he was. I raised one all by myself with no assistance from the mother, including no child support. That makes me half as good as my Mom who raised two on her own with no help.

And the world don't treat single dads the way it treats single moms either. Respect.

[Spott]

Originally Posted by ToxSocks

And the world don't treat single dads the way it treats single moms either. Respect.

Not as much, but honestly sometimes I would get more compliments from it while I was going through it. It’s almost like people don’t expect guys to take that role and just assume it’s a given that women will be the ones to do it. Fwiw, it was damn hard and I don’t recommend it. People need to work through that relationships, especially when they have children.

[ToxSocks]

Originally Posted by Spott

Not as much, but honestly sometimes I would get more compliments from it while I was going through it. It’s almost like people don’t expect guys to take that role and just assume it’s a given that women will be the ones to do it. Fwiw, it was damn hard and I don’t recommend it. People need to work through that relationships, especially when they have children.

In cali we have this program called "WIC". It's a food voucher program. WIC stands for "Women, Infants and Children".

I was like...idk, 10-11 years old, handn't eaten in 2 days, and my dad and I went to their office for food and we got turned away.

We got turned away because WIC is for WOMEN, infants and children. And because my dad wasn't a women, we weren't eligible. LOL.

Society always has had much more patience and care for single women raising children than single men.

To my understanding they've since changed that policy but still....

[Easy 6]

No better, no worse

[displacedinMN]

Yes. No doubt. I loved my parents, but mom never showed love. Was hard to get to know. It loosened up a little as there were grandkids. But not perfect.

Dad was great. Farmer-and spent life working. That was the top priority.
But I was never the outgoing kid.

[George Liquor]

My dad was pretty grumpy when I was growing up and I didn't help the situation by being a shithead. I get along great with my parents now and visit them about every 3rd day... but I hope I have a better relationship with my kids than I did with my parents when I was a teen.

[Katipan]

My dad had to carry my birth certificate around in his wallet because people would find a white male with a young brown girl to be odd.

[BigRedChief]

Originally Posted by Katipan

My dad had to carry my birth certificate around in his wallet because people would find a white male with a young brown girl to be odd.

Thats sad. Glad we have moved on, well most have moved on.

I was way bigger than my classmates in elementary school. I was at least a foot taller than most and I was in shape. As a pitcher I threw faster than anyone had ever seen in Springfield(circa 67-69). I would have kids get in the batters box crying cause they were afraid. Sooooo every game there was mom's, dad's coaches etc. demanding my mom produce a birth certificate for me. She carried one on her at all my games.

A lot sillier reason than your more serious reason.

[Katipan]

Originally Posted by BigRedChief

Thats sad. Glad we have moved on, well most have moved on.

I was way bigger than my classmates in elementary school. I was at least a foot taller than most and I was in shape. As a pitcher I threw faster than anyone had ever seen in Springfield(circa 67-69). I would have kids get in the batters box crying cause they were afraid. Sooooo every game there was mom's, dad's coaches etc. demanding my mom produce a birth certificate for me. She carried one on her at all my games.

A lot sillier reason than your more serious reason.

Their reaction is silly, yes.

But no less silly than the way we treated dads as bumbling dolts who only managed to keep kids alive until mommy got home.

I’m sorry you got singled out.
You are lucky I wasn’t an aunt or something coming to the games.

[BigRedChief]

Originally Posted by Katipan

Their reaction is silly, yes.

But no less silly than the way we treated dads as bumbling dolts who only managed to keep kids alive until mommy got home.

I’m sorry you got singled out.
You are lucky I wasn’t an aunt or something coming to the games.

I never took it personally. I was a danger to those kids. I was so much bigger and stronger. It was summer rec ball. There was no such thing as competitive ball back then. I had no idea on how throw a strike so I was wild. Which didn't exactly calm the nervous moms down.
By 6th grade I was 6'2". Stopped growing. I didn't really have any athletic talent, I was just bigger than other kids my age.

BTW, I wanted to play with kids the same size and weight as me but the little league wouldn't allow it. And my Dad never attended one of my baseball games, Ever. How ****ed up is that shit? Maybe that's why I coached my sons teams even in sports I had no clue about(soccer).

[Fansy the Famous Bard]

Not even close. My mom was a saint. I'm more like an average Joe that had kids and was like "oh ****".