Old People Thread

[kozzman555]

Hello old people of CP! Do you ever think about wanting to talk about problems you and other old people have? Is this football forum the only place on the internet you know how to get to? Well look no further! This old man thread is here for you to talk about your trials and tribulations.

Have an itch to complain about how the young generation doesn't know what hard work is? Post it in here! Are there some birds that need yelled or do you have neighbors that play music too loud? We'd love to hear about it! Did you fill your diapers and want to complain about the poor quality of Chinese products? Please regale us!

So if you can barely see letters in this thread without zooming in, but refuse to give up your drivers license, we'd love to read what you have to tell us! Come on in, bring your Werther's candy, and folksy tales of how things used to be!

[Lzen]

Originally Posted by Easy 6

I've been through that exact scenario many times, same with some asshole at the gas station wanting 20 lottery tickets scanned and then taking their sweet time buying another twenty

Never understood why we can't just have dedicated lottery ticket stores

I hate those people. I used to work in convenience stores in my younger days and those people would drive me crazy. They would piss off all the customers that wanted to just come in and pick up something real quick. I would sometimes make them stand aside while they are making up their minds. And when a rush was over, those jackholes would keep me from getting work done around the store because they would constantly need me to ring up their tickets.

[Easy 6]

Originally Posted by Lzen

I hate those people. I used to work in convenience stores in my younger days and those people would drive me crazy. They would piss off all the customers that wanted to just come in and pick up something real quick. I would sometimes make them stand aside while they are making up their minds. And when a rush was over, those jackholes would keep me from getting work done around the store because they would constantly need me to ring up their tickets.

knew it couldn't just be me who's had it up to HERE with those pricks

[kozzman555]

I totally get that. When you're old, you only have so much time left, I'm sure you don't want to spend those precious minutes waiting in line. You gotta get to bingo night!

[Frazod]

Originally Posted by srvy

The average traffic light is a wait of about three minutes. I bet some of you go on thru at 2.

Damn right I do.

The stoplight at the end of my street is green to turn left for about 10 seconds and red for about four minutes. Luckily I turn right to go to work, but pretty much everything else is left. I hate that ****ing light. When I first moved here 20+ years ago there wasn't a light, and I kept hoping we'd get one. Classic example of be careful what you wish for. If there is no traffic I run it regularly. Also, the main road has been under eternal construction for over two years, so for all that time there is no room to get around anybody turning left. So turning right is a pain in the ass, too.

But as bad as that light is, another one about a mile up the road is far worse. It is the devil light. I'm convinced that it is sentient, and it personally hates me. It's timed so that if you drive normally coming from my direction it turns red right when you get there. It's ****ing maddening. I easily miss the goddamn thing about 80% of the time, and the side street is busy enough that I generally can't run it. I would wall that street off if I could. Everybody who lives on it can go choke on a bag of dicks.

If the day ever comes that I snap and go completely insane, the first thing I shoot won't be a person. It'll be that ****ing stoplight.



Can you tell I just got home from running errands?

[srvy]

Originally Posted by Easy 6

I've been through that exact scenario many times, same with some asshole at the gas station wanting 20 lottery tickets scanned and then taking their sweet time buying another twenty

Never understood why we can't just have dedicated lottery ticket stores

I call them the Scratchers thankfully Quicktrip in my area wont allow it. They move them to the stand away from the cashiers to scratch.

The landscaper mower folks. Now that is a severe waiting time at a quick stop. Most are Hispanics who bring their own food to warm in the nuker. They refill their 60 oz big gulp. If you see them parked in the lot go elsewhere as your lunch break will be spent waiting at the cashier.

[007]

Get off my lawn

[Frazod]

I can't remember the last time I actually went inside a gas station. But definitely have no use for lotto crackheads.

[srvy]

Have you ever been that guy at the checkout at Costco? When I first joined and got my card I went on a spree. Came to the pastries and saw blueberry muffins had to have. Threw in the cart finished shopping and got in the shortest line available waited for about five in front of me and was surprised at how fast it moved through. Till me, I hadn't read that it was priced at 2 packages of muffins. The cashier told me I was missing one package and that she would send a person to get another. I said thats ok can you just charge half for the one package No! I then told here its fine Ill pay the full price for the one package. She insisted it would only take him a minute to go get another package so I agreed. This guy tore out like the place was on fire. The clock kept ticking the folks started bailing out to longer lines except for the sap behind me who had stuff on the conveyor. This guy must have torn out like a bat out of hell for the shitter then flirted with the gals in the bakery we waited i told her just cancel the muffins. She insisted he will be back shortly. The manager came over and then called on the walkie-talkie. There wasn't any blueberry left on the table he came back so I had another choice I made it for lemon poppy. He comes back they are out of those also, so I asked him to ask what is on the table I'll take it. Pretty soon he comes back with chocolate chip. I was relieved as I was the shitheel of shitheels to everyone behind me. But I wasn't done yet it had to be scanned for inventory. It wouldn't scan she tried it a few times finally punching in the numbers and I was set free. I was scared for life I have no idea how long it all took but it seen an eternity. The eyes of hate seemed to be staring holes through me. It scarred me as I live in fear of the bakery is it two for or one single item?

[Rain Man]

Originally Posted by srvy

Have you ever been that guy at the checkout at Costco? When I first joined and got my card I went on a spree. Came to the pastries and saw blueberry muffins had to have. Threw in the cart finished shopping and got in the shortest line available waited for about five in front of me and was surprised at how fast it moved through. Till me, I hadn't read that it was priced at 2 packages of muffins. The cashier told me I was missing one package and that she would send a person to get another. I said thats ok can you just charge half for the one package No! I then told here its fine Ill pay the full price for the one package. She insisted it would only take him a minute to go get another package so I agreed. This guy tore out like the place was on fire. The clock kept ticking the folks started bailing out to longer lines except for the sap behind me who had stuff on the conveyor. This guy must have torn out like a bat out of hell for the shitter then flirted with the gals in the bakery we waited i told her just cancel the muffins. She insisted he will be back shortly. The manager came over and then called on the walkie-talkie. There wasn't any blueberry left on the table he came back so I had another choice I made it for lemon poppy. He comes back they are out of those also, so I asked him to ask what is on the table I'll take it. Pretty soon he comes back with chocolate chip. I was relieved as I was the shitheel of shitheels to everyone behind me. But I wasn't done yet it had to be scanned for inventory. It wouldn't scan she tried it a few times finally punching in the numbers and I was set free. I was scared for life I have no idea how long it all took but it seen an eternity. The eyes of hate seemed to be staring holes through me. It scarred me as I live in fear of the bakery is it two for or one single item?

I bet you passed bin Laden on the enemies list of everyone in line that day.

[Mosbonian]

Originally Posted by Lzen

**** this being old shit. I'm 51 and I just played basketball last night against guys that were anywhere from 20 to 30 years younger than me. Hell, my son, who is 26, has friends that text me when they want to hoop. I may not be young and as quick as I used to be but I'll be damned if I let my age hold me back.

At 55 I was still playing softball and volleyball with guys in their 20's....but one day you will wake up and crap doesn't stop hurting as quickly.

Or that sore knee that went away with an Advil lingers

[BEAVER]

I occasionally use an actual paper map to navigate.

[Mosbonian]

Originally Posted by Graystoke

Geez my balls hit the water when I shit at Kohls

Ok...I laughed out loud during a conference call reading this ine

[PHOG]

Good Lord!! The ice cream truck just went by, pounding out its music at about 125 decibels. Turn that shit down!!!!!

[Mosbonian]

Originally Posted by old_geezer

What would you call someone over 78? (Asking for a friend)

LUCKY?

[BigRedChief]

Originally Posted by Zebedee DuBois

I'll put some boundaries on what I think you are saying.

Let's say the life expectancy is 78
0-26 years is YOUTH
27-52 years is MIDDLE AGE
53-78 years is OLD

If you need this to be validated, ask any 26 year old if a 53 year old person is OLD, and they will nearly always say "Absolutely!"

I'm sure we can make subcategories to the above to soothe our egos.

I know some don’t like it on here but, it’s the truth.