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Old 09-03-2015, 10:05 AM  
Saccopoo Saccopoo is offline
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Brain Tumor
So, that shit is fun.

Started having some really cool and powerful deja-vu at work on Tuesday, then a strong ominous feeling set in and then started seeing small, flashing rainbow colored lights under the brim of my hat. Figured that it was either a premonition about an earthquake (like animals get) as Salt Lake City sits on a fault line, either that or I was hitting a major fatigue wall as I had been working long hours and had been hitting the gym pretty hard while not getting as much sleep as required in addition to cutting carbs from the diet. Anyway, I got a little freaked out, went to the bakery, grabbed a croissant and detoured it and everything kinda went back to normal.

Later on, started getting the deja-vu again (and it was super good shit - like I was seeing the future and shit - and it even had a soundtrack going along with it), and that's about all I can remember. Apparently I turned to the guy next to me, said something about tripping my balls off massively and told him I was going to puke, then my eyes rolled back into my head and I passed out and hit the floor like a sack of potatoes.

Came to with the EMT dude holding a ice pack to the back of my mellon on a huge goose egg. They were going to call an ambulance to take me to the ER and I told them it was nothing and I was fine. Fortunately the HR guy was standing there and convinced me to go to the ER. When I got there they did a CT scan to check for concussion probabilities.

Dude came back into the room with the radiologist and said "Um, bad news. There is a mass in the right side of your brain and we want to do an MRI for more detail."

"Well, shit."

So they did that and sure enough, there is a golf ball sized mass sitting there with a bunch of fluid around it. Nuerosurgeon (chief resident who looks like he's 17, comes in and says that they want to schedule surgery on Friday morning. Okies.

So, I'm sitting here in the Neurology wing of the University of Utah hospital (which is highly regarded) worrying about these guys going to the Utah/Michigan game tonight and coming back into surgery tomorrow hungover as shit.

Bonus is, I've had two really hot nurses in a row the past two nights. Tried to convince both to give me a leisure massage and body shampoo, but they didn't go for it though I had a girl from work come by last night to visit who wanted to give me a hummer.

Anyway, I'm feeling pretty fortunate that shit went down the way it did, because I most likely would have blown it off for ever until it became really bad. (Although, I am going to ask them if it's benign if they can just keep it in there because I was digging the deja-vu bordering on omnipotence.)

Also I hear that the chief neurosurgeon is totally old school and I think I saw him sharpening his hacksaw on a rusty pipe outside and telling the nurse that she should find his favorite spoon.
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Old 09-07-2015, 07:51 PM   #181
Marcellus Marcellus is offline
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Get well man, I mean it.

We need more threads about the OL. Not really but you can get well anyway.
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Old 09-07-2015, 08:14 PM   #182
The Bad Guy The Bad Guy is offline
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**** man, hope it all went well. My grandmother had a mass on the left side of her brain about 20 years ago that was successfully operated on, and then had it come back about 2 months ago and had another operation.

She's at 100% already just 5 weeks after surgery.

Hang in there.
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Old 09-07-2015, 09:56 PM   #183
Saccopoo Saccopoo is offline
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Man, I just found out that my post operative blow job has been tripping balls for the past two days eating pizza with "mushrooms" because she was worried about me.

What the **** is the world coming to? Isn't there any nice girls left out there who are willing to give dudes who have a frankenstein looking dome a hummer without having to get high as shit to do it?

**** me.
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Old 09-07-2015, 10:02 PM   #184
Lonewolf Ed Lonewolf Ed is offline
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Don't feel too bad. I have stage IV liver cancer still and I can't even get so much as a flash out of sheer pity.
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Old 09-08-2015, 11:03 PM   #185
Titty Meat Titty Meat is offline
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Hey Sac I thought of you when BYU completed that hail mary. Still bullshit but I hope you're feeling better
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Old 09-09-2015, 06:57 AM   #186
Buehler445 Buehler445 is offline
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Hey Sac I thought of you when BYU completed that hail mary. Still bullshit but I hope you're feeling better
LOL Who changed your name to Mike Riley?
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Old 09-09-2015, 08:09 AM   #187
Chiefnj2 Chiefnj2 is offline
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**** man, hope it all went well. My grandmother had a mass on the left side of her brain about 20 years ago that was successfully operated on, and then had it come back about 2 months ago and had another operation.

She's at 100% already just 5 weeks after surgery.

Hang in there.
Have her NFL draft opinions improved since the surgeries? That's what we are really looking for with Saccappoo.
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Old 09-09-2015, 08:24 AM   #188
patteeu patteeu is offline
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Have her NFL draft opinions improved since the surgeries? That's what we are really looking for with Saccappoo.
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Old 09-09-2015, 08:39 AM   #189
Amnorix Amnorix is offline
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Sorry I'm late to this, but glad to hear everything went well! Best wishes for a speedy recovery, and to hearing that you're cancer free!
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Old 09-09-2015, 11:04 AM   #190
Titty Meat Titty Meat is offline
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LOL Who changed your name to Mike Riley?
I did lol
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Old 09-14-2015, 02:12 PM   #191
Saccopoo Saccopoo is offline
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Ermafukingawd!

Just got the staples pulled out. All 42 of them. Amazingly enough, it was quick as shit, didn't bleed much and not really any discomfort.

The actual sutures where the brain and blood fluid drain tube was (and that was a freaky feeling getting that yanked out) were more of an issues than a bunch of metal staples.

Go figure.

However, I WANT TO ITCH THE ****ING STAPLE HOLES SO ****ING BAD RIGHT NOW!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!
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Old 09-14-2015, 05:23 PM   #192
Sweet Daddy Hate Sweet Daddy Hate is offline
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Ermafukingawd!

Just got the staples pulled out. All 42 of them. Amazingly enough, it was quick as shit, didn't bleed much and not really any discomfort.

The actual sutures where the brain and blood fluid drain tube was (and that was a freaky feeling getting that yanked out) were more of an issues than a bunch of metal staples.

Go figure.

However, I WANT TO ITCH THE ****ING STAPLE HOLES SO ****ING BAD RIGHT NOW!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!
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Old 09-14-2015, 06:18 PM   #193
scho63 scho63 is offline
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I would get one of these to prevent the itching
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Old 09-14-2015, 06:19 PM   #194
BigMeatballDave BigMeatballDave is offline
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LOL Technically, that would only prevent the scratching.
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Old 09-14-2015, 07:02 PM   #195
Meatloaf Meatloaf is offline
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Hang in there Sacc!!! Can you put an ice cube or freeze bag on the area to kind of dull the itchiness? Actually, I have no idea how to treat this current issue, but several beers probably wouldn't hurt!
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