He picks up the card from the Tampa table and walks to the podium, his sword swinging at his hip. He surveys the crowd.
"Ladies and gentlemen," he says. "The draft is about replacing aging talent with young talent. The draft keeps an NFL team young. In a way, the draft is a fountain of youth. I am Ponce de Leon, and with this knowledge my quest is complete."
"We have searched the known world for a young candidate, and we believe that we have found him in the unexplored reaches of the midwest, drinking from the fountain of Champaign."
"With the 194th pick in the NFL draft, and with the blessing of the Queen of Spain,
the Tampa Bay Buccaneers select Oluwole Betiku, DE, Illinois."