-- I shat at Kohl's today
 

Took o poop at Kohl's, not too bad at all.

Notes:

- soft lighting
- low volume background musiic
- nothing on floor + clean counters

One down vote was for a pellet turd remnant from earlier in the day hadn't flushed entirely (so that turned me off of that particular stall)

All in all no complaints
8.4 out of 10
no toilet contact was made

You smell nice

Good shit.

U shoulda taken some boxers from kohl's took a shit and not wiped then put them back on the shelf LOL

Does this shat live near you?


How soft was the toilet paper?

not really sure what else you'd be doing in a Kohls

I shit my pants last night on my couch. I am slowly learning at 40 years old you can never trust a fart.

did you use a ring of toilet paper or work those quads for the hover shite?

I’ve shat at Kohl’s many times in the past! Always make toilet contact tho.

I didn't know that rabbis shopped at Kohl's.

I trust kohl’s for a sanitary shit
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Nice. For Kohl's being a clothing store that sells a lot of low-price stuff, they're remarkably clean and well-run. I enjoy Kohl's, and I'd rather take a shit there over Macy's or JCPenny any day. I'm glad to hear you had a pleasant bathroom experience.

You ever fire off some knuckle children in the Younker’s dressing room?

I'm driving right now but I'll be sure to reply to everybody's questions and comments a little later tonight

There was some cum and hair in the last dump I took at the gas station

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Man once when I was 9 I had wicked ass diarrhea in a Sears. I must've been on the pot for like 45 minutes. That's the kind of shit you remember, especially when you're a kid because it's more intense than anything else you've ever experienced. My dad was like, "I'm gonna take your mom and sister home and then come back, okay?" and when he came back I was still there and had more butt pee to leak out.

That bathroom was dirty and not at all a Kohl's bathroom. Make your bathrooms nicer for 9-year olds to take 45-minute shits in, and maybe you'd still be in business, Sears.

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What was the chain name?

Kum n Go, perhaps ?

Correct. I met a nice muscular Hispanic man online at the gas station

OP did u moan when u wiped?

Did you score some nice middle aged mom pussy, OP?

Did you earn some Kohl’s Cash?

SR is your butthole waxed

Think it's bad at 40? Wait until you are 60 ..

I'm waiting for someone to tell a story of standing up to pee at a Urinal only to realize it's not a fart that accompanied your need to take a pee.

I hate the off season.

this guy?

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I shat a Kohl’s today—oh, boy
I’m a lucky man who laid the snake.
And though the stench was rather bad
Well, I just had to flush
I was in a rush.
I blew my ass out in a stall
But I still noticed that nice music played
I chose to squat instead of sit
I’d seen this place before
Nobody was there to see how clean that they had mopped the floor.

I wiped my ass today oh boy.
Someone else had left a pellet turd
In a stall that turned me off
But I just had to look
That dam bathroom crook

(refrain)
I should have flushed it down…

(Bridge)

Woke up, turned on the tube.
Rubbed one out without no lube.
Found my way downstairs and saw an ad.
Kohl’s has half-off coats. Not bad!
Ate granola. Off I went.
Felt an oncoming bowel event.
Found my way inside and towards the back.
The lighting was soft and I went into a stall.

(interlude)
Unh-ugh-ugh-ugh
Ah-ah-ah, ah-ah-aaah


I shat at Kohl’s today--oh, boy
Low background music and clean countertops.
I never sat down in the stall
I made a new poop thread
Now you know how nice it is to fill the toilet bowl at Kohl’s

I’d love to flush it down.

Does this off season live near you?

always use the complimentary ass gaskets

What A-hole takes a shit while facing the tank/wall? ****ing animals

“Clean counters”

“No contact with toilet”

You shit in damn sink……didn’t you??

I would use your cawk as a bidet

I'm more picky and those are flimsy things. I use toilet paper to go around the toilet seat and sometimes double layer. Makes more soft sit and covers the seat better than those flimsy thin ass gaskets.


Also i hate automatic toilet flushers. Sitting there and it automatic flushes before your done taking a shit and it's gross having water splash on your ass.

Your dad left you alone in a Sears shitter? LMAO

You’re lucky. Adam Walsh was decapitated for less than that.

Gives you a clean slate to write on
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American Pie taught me how to cover a toilet seat properly.

My best shit story was getting sick at the Native American Museum, on a buffalo burger, while touring DC.

It hit me later that day at the Holocaust museum and I was blowing out that bathroom like you can't believe! This quiet and humble place and I was just ripping that bathroom apart with tons of other people in it.

Kohl's? Do they even have men's bathrooms? That's a lady store.

That’s why they had a tampon machine in there …
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Where do you get your clothes from?

I'm 6'4" and have to shop big and tall. JC Penney is my go to and that's shopping online. Some other places have tall men's clothing but it's hit or miss. I also prefer Hanes online store. They run some good deals from time to time for underwear, tees, sweats, etc..

Pooped in the urinal

I buy nothing but wolves howling at the moon and crying American eagle t-shirts. I get a lot of pussy.

My favorite dumping spot used to be the Macy's at Independence Center. Surprised to hear about Kohl's. I would say the worst has to be Barnes & Noble.

YES, for the WIN! Do it in front of others in the room so they UNDERSTAND the wraith that is taking place in their presence! :thumb: Someone was having a Holocaust of their own. Those patrons UNDERSTAND now what the Holocaust experience was - they lived it through you my brother! Great job! :clap:

Of course I do not think ANYTHING regarding the Holocaust is humorous by any means - this is merely a funny side thought.

SR offered up some real Intel and a nice review.
The rest of y'all kind of crapped on a potential informative thread.

Do people really use ass gaskets anymore? I just find the cleanest stall, grab a handful of clean TP and do a quick wipe of the seat and then plant my ass and go. If I am taking a dump in a public restroom, it likely isn’t for a leisure rest but rather an emergent situation.

Disappointed this wasn't in the dressing room...

**** you

My favorite go-to poop spots are the nice hotels or golf country clubs all over Scottsdale.

Once I even had a nice free breakfast at an upscale hotel as the conference room next to the shitter had cleared out but the cleaning service hadn't come to clear the chaffing and service dishes.

Just pulled out a seat at a clean table and had myself fresh squeezed OJ, sausages, bacon, pancakes, fresh fruit, cheese and cold cuts, fresh coffee, toast, muffins. All fresh and no one left to eat but me! :thumb:

The company that had the space and breakfast just left for their business trip. LOL

So tell us more about the poop itself. Clean breaker? Rope? Diarrhea?

Don't leave us hanging!

Did they have single-ply TP or double-ply TP?

I took the most perfectly elegant, double tapered shit last night. Just a one turder with very little cleanup involved. I was so pleased with it. Then as I was about to stand up, I felt a rumble and it was like Typhoon Haiyan and the eruption of Mount Tambora all at once. I think I lost 8 pounds. Its too bad I wasn't at Kohls for it.

Fix his shit, Daface!

Time to tell the story...

The only 2 places while on the road that I trust to use the bathroom is Buccee's and Cracker Barrel. This one occurred at a Cracker Barrel in TN.

We had been traveling all morning and breakfast was rumbling in my stomach and was letting me know it was just about exit time. It was near lunch time so the family all agreed on CB for lunch.

The family got seated and I headed to the bathroom and found an open and clean stall. I had just proceeded to drop a load and I hear a guy come in with his kid. The son went one urinal and dad to the other. Right in the middle of taking a leak the Dad let out a fart that left no doubt he should have gone to the other stall. It was hard enough to stifle my laugh as it was but when the kid said "eww Dad I think you crapped your pants!"

There was no way to stifle a laugh after that. I finished wiping, pulled up my pants and got out of the stall...making sure not to make any eye contact. I washed my hands as the dad instructed the son to go tell his Mom to get him a change of clothes and for him to bring them back.

I headed out into the general waiting area trying to work my way to the dining area. As luck would have it I was blocked by the boy who was trying to whisper to his mom about what he needed. The mom in exasperation told the boy to speak up.And true to child like manner he speaks up in a loud voice "Dad crapped his pants in the bathroom and needs new clothes ".

I've never seen someone turn so red and exit the building so fast.

Ne

It was probably the apple cider. I had 2 large mugs of that and had to pull over on the shoulder between Columbia and Moberly to run and shit in the brush with a paper bag to wipe my ass with.
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I shit piles that peak over the water.

SR is always thinking in terms of helping his fellow CPers. He seems more than nice. Will buy some Kohls’ stock tomorrow as its price will surely rise on the news of SR’s review.

You can’t risk toilet contact no matter how confident you are in your squatting ability. Always build a nest to hedge against the worst case scenario.

If I said it once I've said it 23 or more times . Keto shits are the best shits and when you are doing keto they just drop in the toilet with little effort and solid shit without having to wipe except to just to make sure. I need to go back on the keto diet. Shits have been more and greasy and using up too much toilet paper. Need to be more conservative. When the great shortage of toilet paper crisis of 2020 I did not fret I got by on keto diet that saved me from running out of toilet paper too soon.

Yep quads

Thank you SNR

No

Not in a while.

No.

No.

I apologize. Goose strands/ropes


Single ply - I abused the amount per wipe. About three people's 'normal' wipes.


Thanks Tom, That's very nice to say.

Very nice to see you post.

Any other questions? I was at Kohl's for an Amazon return as they're a return hub for my area. I don't shop there, but certainly not above it (they had some cute Nike golf blouses)

Where is the nicest place you've shat?

one doesn't really stand out but I'm sure it was super nice.

Hotel room at Caesars Palace has to be close for me.

very nice.

The more pricier the hotel the nicer the poop shatter room is.

Steer clear of the Olive Garden shitter, the toilet paper is pathetic

When I played basketball we did a drill where we all lined up and shot free throws. If you missed, you had to go stand in the defensive stance until the game was over and one person remained. That drill really helped my ability to squat and take a nice healthy deuce without making contact with the seat. Plus it made me a tiny bit better of a defender...

That shits free for a big baller like me

would you face off with Big Bill in a match of Battleshits?

I’d ****ing lose horribly

Bungalow Bill probably defeats most people in battle shits I'd imagine.

I sit bare-assed on public toilets.

I layered the toiler everytime I take a shit in a public place. But I also love doing public shits at the same time. I shit about 3 times per day. So I use at least 2 of those towards public utensils.

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When, where and what kind of shat did you have today Simply Red?

I will give you every casino cash dollar I have to go to the Jungle Law office in KC and poop on the lawyers desk.