WebMD is a great website. It says you have 2 months to live before you die from AIDS but in reality all you have is an allergy problem

be one with the poop. then you can move the poop.

Didn't you lose a bet? Your username should be something shittier than the one you have.

Clay ate a Dingo's bay-bay

Good God man LMAOLMAOLMAOLMAOLMAOLMAOLMAO

Did you cry?

it amazes me that your single.

God damn it. I can't believe I actually just saw a picture of Clay's shit.

Or you are drinking too much grape soda...

As it turns out taking too many laxatives in a 48-hour period can lead to some stomach discomfort. Oy vey.

That's actually not as bad as I expected. I bet it was the consistency of a piece of rebar though. Did you cry when it came out? How's your butt? Did it tear?

why is the top of the turd folded over like a poop oragami?

TP queen from the looks of it

Some of you shit gazers need to be passed out spoons. Sorta like the cream of mushroom soup vomit scene in The Great Santini

Come on grunts get on it.

He already used some, it's called magnesium citrate. ;)

Boo Berry cereal FTW!

Just wait until you realize what magnesium citrate does AFTER you go.

Found this one out when I was a kid....scared the green crap out of me.

It's from overuse of that hook shaped dildo he's been using to tickle his prostate. Damn it Clay. I told you that thing would make your poops looks weird.

you should call it "casseling".....

You couldn't pay me enough to open that photo. No way.

No kidding.

What did anybody think was going to be in that spoiler? Dumbshits. ROFL

Hershey Squirts leads to that debilitating, uncomfortable sensation known as "Tangy Asshole."

Heh.

I thought these were black jokes until I read Mosbonian's post.

Substitute the vomit for the turd and its somthing like this.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5betKv46GB4

I was rudely awakened at 2AM by a wet, explosive aftershock. Debris was small and scattered.

After a night of gurgly, fitful sleep, I broke my shitting fast about an hour ago. This was again explosive, wet and a powerful shock to my recently evacuated bowels. The formation resembled the Philippines.

I have since consumed two more pain pills. Will the cycle repeat itself? We will watch. And pray.

It was actually not painful at all. I've been downing stool softeners like M&Ms since Friday.

The thing is, the saline solution will continue to draw water into the intestine even after it's empty.

Prepare to pass water several times before it's over.

I had two fried eggs, some baked beans and an apple for breakfast.

My soul is prepared.

Midday update: explosive flatulence results in nightcrawler-sized offal.

I believe in the power of blueberries. I was clogged up for days and ate blueberry pancakes at the local diner. First time in my life I shit so much my shit was past the water line a good 2 inches. It was a geographical phenomenon, like a newly discovered island in the ocean built from the depths of active volcanos.

prune juice? I have exactly 2:24 to drink then get to the bathroom.

How many courics?

I can help you test the theory....

Go to Wal-Mart and buy the already prepared 2 liter bottle of Grape Kool-Aid. Spend the next 2 days drinking nothing but that with your meals.

You will spend the next 2 days wondering if all you ate was lettuce and broccoli.

It's the blue dye, which for some reason comes out green.

I mentioned it earlier in the thread, but spend a couple of days eating Boo Berry cereal for breakfast. It does the same thing.

I think I'll pass on the Boo Berry...it was a bad enough experience when I was young that now if I am at a party that has a drink there that is grape in color I leave.

Afternoon update: Almost entirely without warning, a fecal slurry ejects itself from my rectum. I now must treat every quiver of my lower intestine as a possible warning sign of explosive diarrhea. Htismaqe officially added to my list of "People to Kill."

Side note: I haven't shat thrice in one day in a long time.

First of all, it worked, did it not?

Second of all, I warned you!

I'm kidding, of course.

I wish I had a scale. I feel tremendously light.

Ohhhhhhhh balls! That may be it.

I bought a box of Crunch Berries cereal right around the time it started. I finished it a couple days ago and now my poo is brown again

Gee willikers!

That's it.

You're welcome! :D

That's crazy. I've never had that happen before.

Science, bitch!

The red dye they used to use back in the 80's was worse.

There were several alleged cases of intestinal bleeding that ended up being discoloration caused by this:

http://farm4.staticflickr.com/3367/3...249d40e9_z.jpg

taco bell usually does it for me

Taco Bell is easily the cheapest enima you can buy. A couple $.89 burritos and you will be dropping napalm in under 30 mins.

This is the first post I've laughed at on CP in a long time.

How are you not dehydrated?

I'm very dehydrated.

You need to drink quite a large amount of water then. You need to be pissing colorless urine to go along with your cataclysmic shits.

You need to drink lots of water. Dehydration + pain killers = big problems.

I've been drinking all day. Just had some pedialyte actually.

That's good.

The mathematician worked it out using a #2 pencil

http://ratemypoo.com

LMAO

im suprise he was bond up with all the crap that comes out his mouth.

I don't even want to know how you found that site you sick ****, but i laughed my ass off. Go to the staff favorites and check out The Torcher.

Just ate bean soup. My guts are gurglin' and quiverin' like a virgin on prom night.

<a href="https://imgflip.com/i/8y7dc"><img src="//i.imgflip.com/8y7dc.jpg" title="made at imgflip.com"/></a>

#4 was a massive gas explosion with a tiny, solid chunk of excrement.

Kinda fun. I'd pay for a predator-vision replay of that shit. It honestly felt ****ing HUGE. But it was just the gas.

http://i.imgur.com/glSEGb9.jpg

5 total bowel movements over six days. I think I'm caught up now? Can it be not shitting time for awhile, Lord?

This thread merit Hall of Classics consideration yet?

If not why not, it has all the key pieces that make a thread hall worthy.

The thread is kind of shitty, that's why LMAO

Teaspoon of baking soda takes cares of the gas.

Only two litres of fluids in two days? That is less than you should have in a day even if you are not active.

If he's suffering from excessive acid, eating baking soda will create excess gas.

Purple drank...

Should have left to go take a dump during speed dating

What are you a ****ing chemist?

Pothead :evil:

Same thing, right?

Thank you to all the participants of this thread. My fav CP thread since "Draw something fast" and the diarrhea elephant.

We aim to please.

You aim too, please

Baking soda is for heartburn not gas.

In the beans.

We've been talking about Go Chiefs bowel movements for two days. He must be happy as a little girl.

this:
http://img1.targetimg1.com/wcsstore/...5/11454275.jpg

plus this:
http://www.mnn.com/sites/default/files/ElephantWalk.jpg

equals this: