This Week's Important Florida News!

[gblowfish]

Two Boffo Stories:

Story One: Man arrested for giving wicked wedgies, or snuggies, or melvyns, or whatever you call pulling the underwear over a nerd's head.

Story Two: Fifty Year Old School Teacher Gets Tanked on Cheap Wine, wrecks her van, offers to blow the cop if he lets her go.

Florida, I love you. You're just so fun!

Story #1:
Charles Ross is known for orchestrating outrageous pranks and posting them to Youtube. But this time, the 18-year-old prankster may have gone a step too far.

Ross was arrested for battery Sunday night after he allegedly gave a series of wedgies to moviegoers outside the Carmike Royal Palm 20 in Bradenton, Fla., while a friend filmed the prank, the Bradenton Herald reports.

The underwear prank, which Gawker calls a "wedgie spree," ended badly for Ross when a 20-year-old male victim reported to authorities that Ross grabbed him "by the back of his pants and pulled them up hard," according to the Smoking Gun. Although other victims of the schoolyard prank also came forward, the 20-year-old is the only one seeking charges.

On his Youtube channel, Ross has uploaded video footage of him performing a variety of pranks -- from doing handstands over people to trying out pick-up lines -- but the latest in his compilation is by far one of his most hands-on public displays.

According to the police report obtained by the Smoking Gun, Ross challenged the male victim following the wedgie, "asking if he wanted to hit him."

The Mantee County Sheriff's Office arrested Ross and detained him overnight. He was released on $750 bail, records show, and his court date is set for Feb. 14.

Though Ross' wedgie spree was meant in jest, this is not the first time someone has been arrested for doling out the uncomfortable underwear gag. In 2006, an Albany, N.Y., teacher was arrested for endangering the welfare of a child after allegedly giving a 10-year-old student a wedgie during summer school.

http://www.manateesheriff.com/Public...px?ID=10125392

Story #2:
'A' for effort?
Middle school math teacher Mary Maloney allegedly offered oral sex to a police officer after being nabbed for a hit-and-run in Palm Beach County, Fla.

Maloney, 53, was arrested Sunday after she crashed her van into a pickup truck around 8:35 p.m., then took off, according to an arrest report obtained by the Sun Sentinel. A witness to the crash tracked Maloney's car to a parking spot and then called police.

The arresting officer said he found an empty gallon jug of wine behind Maloney's driver's seat and "immediately smelled the strong odor of an alcoholic beverage emitting from her person," according to WPTV. The report states that her eyes were glassy, bloodshot, and partially closed.
The officer that drove Maloney to the police station noted that she asked him "How much do I need to pay you to just let me go? Don't you understand I am a school teacher?"

She then allegedly offered to perform oral sex on him and allow him to fondle her breasts.

Maloney was charged with driving under the influence, leaving the scene of a crash with damage, resisting an officer without violence, driving with a suspended license and attempted bribery of a public servant.

[Renegade]

Guilty

[KChiefs1]

Originally Posted by gblowfish

https://www.kmbc.com/article/florida...XeBfDmUUC8OYHY


ORANGE COUNTY, Fla. — A Florida father says he doesn't understand why his fifth-grade son was asked to remove his Hooters-themed face mask at school.

He says his son has been wearing it for weeks.

"There is nothing offensive or derogatory about this mask," Greg Golba said.

Golba and his 11-year-old son, Ian, don't understand why he had to remove his Hooters mask on Tuesday.

"I don't think it's offensive at all, it's just a restaurant," Greg Golba said.

The fifth grader says his teacher at Sunset Park Elementary School in Windermere said something about it.

"I wore it and she said it was not appropriate for school and I asked her why and she said if you really want to know why, go ask the principal," Ian Golba said.

So, that's what Ian did.

"He told me to take it off three times and I asked him why, he said just take it off, so I took it off and I had to wear a different mask," Ian Golba said.

Ian put on a second mask that he had, but his father says he's worn the Hooters mask for four weeks and was only told twice to remove it.

The district does not comment on discipline matters but says the Hooters mask violates the dress code, which says in part:

"The principal at each school reserves the right to determine what appropriate dress is for the school ..."

Ian's father says Ian planned to wear his mask on Wednesday and remove it if they ask him.

[Otter]

[GloryDayz]

Originally Posted by Otter

Would.

[Otter]

Originally Posted by GloryDayz

Would.

x3

Want the unedited version that shows the hiney.

[Rain Man]

Originally Posted by Otter

x3

Want the unedited version that shows the hiney.

The unedited video is critical to my understanding of the story.

[displacedinMN]

she has had as much work as a car after a wreck

[TrebMaxx]

I still want to see the if the work on the hiney checks out as OK. Need that unedited version.

[Otter]

Originally Posted by Rain Man

The unedited video is critical to my understanding of the story.

Thank you Rain Man. Always a man of reason. I can think of at least 3 hiding places that may need to be revealed for a thorough investigation.

[KChiefs1]

Not Florida related but I found this hilarious!

Independence, MO please never change lmaoooooo pic.twitter.com/uHR9R4hPEj

— Matt C (@MattfromKC) January 14, 2021

[gblowfish]

Florida man weaponizing a gator!
https://www.actionnewsjax.com/news/f...CgYFZ9cePbOptU

A Jupiter, Florida, man was arrested for throwing a live alligator into a Wendy's restaurant drive-through east of Loxahatchee, according to WPTV.
Joshua James, 23, was charged with aggravated assault with a deadly weapon, illegally killing, possessing or capturing an alligator, and second-degree larceny petit theft, according to the Palm Beach Sheriff’s Office.
He has not been released on bail as of Monday afternoon. WPTV reports that the incident occurred in October, but James had only been arrested recently by U.S. marshals.

Officials with Florida Fish and Wildlife Conservation Commission told WPTV that James pulled up for his order, and after a server handed a drink and turned around, James tossed the 3 1/2-foot gator into the drive-through window.

[Hydrae]

Originally Posted by gblowfish

Florida man weaponizing a gator!
https://www.actionnewsjax.com/news/f...CgYFZ9cePbOptU

A Jupiter, Florida, man was arrested for throwing a live alligator into a Wendy's restaurant drive-through east of Loxahatchee, according to WPTV.
Joshua James, 23, was charged with aggravated assault with a deadly weapon, illegally killing, possessing or capturing an alligator, and second-degree larceny petit theft, according to the Palm Beach Sheriff’s Office.
He has not been released on bail as of Monday afternoon. WPTV reports that the incident occurred in October, but James had only been arrested recently by U.S. marshals.

Officials with Florida Fish and Wildlife Conservation Commission told WPTV that James pulled up for his order, and after a server handed a drink and turned around, James tossed the 3 1/2-foot gator into the drive-through window.

Um, this is interesting and fits this thread but the article is dated 2/23/2016.

[Scooter LaCanforno]

From 2014

BREVARD COUNTY, Fla. —
Wildlife workers are trying to catch a shark in Brevard County, however it's not in the ocean but in a park pond. "It's not often you hear about a shark at a park. I mean, it sounds like a sci-fi movie," said Billy McDonald.

According to trapper James Dean, he believes someone dumped the 4-foot bull shark into the pond at Gleason Park in Indian Harbour Beach.

The shark is believed to have been in the pond for a month.

"The shark doesn't belong in this type of water, and we truly believe that somebody did release it in here," said Dean.

He said it's not fair to the shark because it can't get out unless someone catches it, and that is what he plans to do.

On Monday, Dean attempted to catch the shark using chum and mullet but reeled in nine turtles.

"I've never dealt with something like this," Dean said. "It will be difficult and time consuming. We want to get it out of here."

Indian Harbour Beach City Manager Mark Ryan said the overflow pipes connecting the pond to the river are grated to keep gators out, so it's unlikely a shark got there on its own.

Dean said sharks can adapt from salt water to fresh water but it is unique for it to do that.

"It is not a public safety issue as long as the media is putting it out there and people keep their children, their dogs away from the water," Dean said. "This shark is not going to jump out of the water like an alligator does."

Dean said he is not sure how long it will take to catch the animal, but once he does, he will drive it to the Indian River and release it.

He was unable to catch the shark Tuesday but said he planned to be back on Wednesday morning.

Residents have nicknamed the elusive shark "Sushi."

[gblowfish]

Originally Posted by Hydrae

Um, this is interesting and fits this thread but the article is dated 2/23/2016.

I was distracted because I thought the perp looked like Tony Romo!

[FloridaMan88]

Fight breaks out at Miami International Airport yesterday...

Today at Miami International Airport outside Urban Decay at Gate D14 #BecauseMiami pic.twitter.com/wRnXh8f7dS

— Billy Corben (@BillyCorben) April 25, 2021