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Old 05-19-2014, 11:46 AM  
Hammock Parties Hammock Parties is offline
I'll be back.
 
Join Date: Nov 2002
I'm on a mission to shit

Five days ago I had surgery.

On the first day I did not shit. This did not surprise me, as I had not eaten since lunchtime the day before.

On the second day I did not shit. This did not surprise me, as the doctors informed me that I may experience constipation.

On the third day, I did not shit. I became concerned. I began eating apples, taking a stool softener, and enjoyed a large bowl of indian beans.

On the fourth day, I did not shit. My bowels began to feel...too full. I drank two large glasses of Metamucil and two tablespoons of milk of magnesia.

It is the fifth day, and I have not shat, though farts are coming profusely and with great force. I took two tablets of Senokot (recommended by my doctor) and downed a large bowl of Kellog's Fiber Plus about an hour ago.

I'm on a mission. To shit.

Please, God. Let me shit.
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Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 05-19-2014, 06:10 PM   #196
Hammock Parties Hammock Parties is offline
I'll be back.
 
Join Date: Nov 2002
got some gurgling...little rumbling....is this it!??
Posts: 276,613
Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 05-19-2014, 06:11 PM   #197
LoneWolf LoneWolf is offline
Constable of Untruths
 
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: Wichita
Less memes more shitting. Hurry up.
Posts: 14,921
LoneWolf is obviously part of the inner Circle.LoneWolf is obviously part of the inner Circle.LoneWolf is obviously part of the inner Circle.LoneWolf is obviously part of the inner Circle.LoneWolf is obviously part of the inner Circle.LoneWolf is obviously part of the inner Circle.LoneWolf is obviously part of the inner Circle.LoneWolf is obviously part of the inner Circle.LoneWolf is obviously part of the inner Circle.LoneWolf is obviously part of the inner Circle.LoneWolf is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 05-19-2014, 06:12 PM   #198
Hammock Parties Hammock Parties is offline
I'll be back.
 
Join Date: Nov 2002
brb

Posts: 276,613
Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 05-19-2014, 06:13 PM   #199
New World Order New World Order is offline
Choco Favre
 
Join Date: Jul 2012
Quote:
Originally Posted by Count Zarth View Post
brb



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New World Order is obviously part of the inner Circle.New World Order is obviously part of the inner Circle.New World Order is obviously part of the inner Circle.New World Order is obviously part of the inner Circle.New World Order is obviously part of the inner Circle.New World Order is obviously part of the inner Circle.New World Order is obviously part of the inner Circle.New World Order is obviously part of the inner Circle.New World Order is obviously part of the inner Circle.New World Order is obviously part of the inner Circle.New World Order is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 05-19-2014, 06:13 PM   #200
htismaqe htismaqe is offline
'Tis my eye!
 
Join Date: Aug 2000
Location: Chiefsplanet
Quote:
Originally Posted by Count Zarth View Post
No shit?
Yes, absolutely.

Opium-derived painkillers cause constipation for just about everybody that takes them. It's one of the top 2 or 3 most common side effects. I never mentioned it before because I figured you already knew that.
Posts: 100,022
htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 05-19-2014, 06:13 PM   #201
htismaqe htismaqe is offline
'Tis my eye!
 
Join Date: Aug 2000
Location: Chiefsplanet
Quote:
Originally Posted by LoneWolf View Post
C'mon, shit ****er. I have to teach a class in 30 minutes and I don't want to have to keep pulling up ChiefsPlanet on the big screen during the class.
Posts: 100,022
htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.htismaqe is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 05-19-2014, 06:14 PM   #202
Dayze Dayze is offline
Resident Glue Sniffer
 
Join Date: Nov 2003
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dante84 View Post
You should go get your colon cleansed.

They put a hose in your butt, spray all up in it, and then it shoots out like a chocolate fountain (but into a hose, I think).
"I think "

lol
Posts: 37,353
Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 05-19-2014, 06:16 PM   #203
LoneWolf LoneWolf is offline
Constable of Untruths
 
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: Wichita
Quote:
Originally Posted by Count Zarth View Post
brb

Posts: 14,921
LoneWolf is obviously part of the inner Circle.LoneWolf is obviously part of the inner Circle.LoneWolf is obviously part of the inner Circle.LoneWolf is obviously part of the inner Circle.LoneWolf is obviously part of the inner Circle.LoneWolf is obviously part of the inner Circle.LoneWolf is obviously part of the inner Circle.LoneWolf is obviously part of the inner Circle.LoneWolf is obviously part of the inner Circle.LoneWolf is obviously part of the inner Circle.LoneWolf is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 05-19-2014, 06:18 PM   #204
ghak99 ghak99 is offline
MVP
 
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Missouri
Try squeezing your head.
Posts: 8,106
ghak99 has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.ghak99 has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.ghak99 has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.ghak99 has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.ghak99 has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.ghak99 has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.ghak99 has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.ghak99 has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.ghak99 has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.ghak99 has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.ghak99 has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.
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Old 05-19-2014, 06:18 PM   #205
T-Town T-Town is offline
Starter
 
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Dayton Ohio
To the shit?
Posts: 264
T-Town has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.T-Town has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.T-Town has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.T-Town has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.T-Town has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.T-Town has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.T-Town has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.T-Town has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.T-Town has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.T-Town has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.T-Town has just been standing around suckin' on a big ol' chili dog.
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Old 05-19-2014, 06:19 PM   #206
Hog's Gone Fishin Hog's Gone Fishin is offline
Fish are scared of me
 
Join Date: Nov 2001
.Pulling for you Clay. Get that crap flowin
Posts: 40,231
Hog's Gone Fishin is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hog's Gone Fishin is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hog's Gone Fishin is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hog's Gone Fishin is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hog's Gone Fishin is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hog's Gone Fishin is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hog's Gone Fishin is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hog's Gone Fishin is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hog's Gone Fishin is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hog's Gone Fishin is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hog's Gone Fishin is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 05-19-2014, 06:23 PM   #207
Dayze Dayze is offline
Resident Glue Sniffer
 
Join Date: Nov 2003
Quote:
Originally Posted by ghak99 View Post
Try squeezing your head.
Posts: 37,353
Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 05-19-2014, 06:30 PM   #208
Hammock Parties Hammock Parties is offline
I'll be back.
 
Join Date: Nov 2002
Negative, negative. Just impacted on the surface.

Posts: 276,613
Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 05-19-2014, 06:35 PM   #209
TribalElder TribalElder is offline
Arrowhead Trail of Tears
 
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: KansasCity
Did you hear about the mathematician who solved the problem of constipation?
Posts: 29,081
TribalElder is obviously part of the inner Circle.TribalElder is obviously part of the inner Circle.TribalElder is obviously part of the inner Circle.TribalElder is obviously part of the inner Circle.TribalElder is obviously part of the inner Circle.TribalElder is obviously part of the inner Circle.TribalElder is obviously part of the inner Circle.TribalElder is obviously part of the inner Circle.TribalElder is obviously part of the inner Circle.TribalElder is obviously part of the inner Circle.TribalElder is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 05-19-2014, 06:36 PM   #210
eDave eDave is offline
Banned
 
Join Date: Jan 2013
Join us in chat!
Posts: 53,803
eDave is obviously part of the inner Circle.eDave is obviously part of the inner Circle.eDave is obviously part of the inner Circle.eDave is obviously part of the inner Circle.eDave is obviously part of the inner Circle.eDave is obviously part of the inner Circle.eDave is obviously part of the inner Circle.eDave is obviously part of the inner Circle.eDave is obviously part of the inner Circle.eDave is obviously part of the inner Circle.eDave is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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