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Old 05-19-2014, 11:46 AM  
Hammock Parties Hammock Parties is offline
you seem nice
 
Join Date: Nov 2002
I'm on a mission to shit

Five days ago I had surgery.

On the first day I did not shit. This did not surprise me, as I had not eaten since lunchtime the day before.

On the second day I did not shit. This did not surprise me, as the doctors informed me that I may experience constipation.

On the third day, I did not shit. I became concerned. I began eating apples, taking a stool softener, and enjoyed a large bowl of indian beans.

On the fourth day, I did not shit. My bowels began to feel...too full. I drank two large glasses of Metamucil and two tablespoons of milk of magnesia.

It is the fifth day, and I have not shat, though farts are coming profusely and with great force. I took two tablets of Senokot (recommended by my doctor) and downed a large bowl of Kellog's Fiber Plus about an hour ago.

I'm on a mission. To shit.

Please, God. Let me shit.
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Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 05-19-2014, 02:36 PM   #91
BryanBusby BryanBusby is offline
MVP
 
Join Date: Mar 2006
A co-worker told me once that he usually downs a bottle before he goes to visit the in laws.

"They often comment about how much time I spend in the bathroom"
Posts: 12,642
BryanBusby is too fat/Omaha.BryanBusby is too fat/Omaha.BryanBusby is too fat/Omaha.BryanBusby is too fat/Omaha.BryanBusby is too fat/Omaha.BryanBusby is too fat/Omaha.BryanBusby is too fat/Omaha.BryanBusby is too fat/Omaha.BryanBusby is too fat/Omaha.BryanBusby is too fat/Omaha.BryanBusby is too fat/Omaha.
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Old 05-19-2014, 02:37 PM   #92
booger booger is offline
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Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: clear out in the sticks
Mr miagee as egg is great in that movie
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Old 05-19-2014, 02:38 PM   #93
ptlyon ptlyon is offline
Bono & Grbac wasn't enough
 
Join Date: Oct 2000
Location: Sioux City, IA
Quote:
Originally Posted by Count Zarth View Post
Drank it all.

Now relaxing to John Carpenter's "Big Trouble In Little China" soundtrack.
Did it have a great lemony flavor?
Posts: 18,831
ptlyon is obviously part of the inner Circle.ptlyon is obviously part of the inner Circle.ptlyon is obviously part of the inner Circle.ptlyon is obviously part of the inner Circle.ptlyon is obviously part of the inner Circle.ptlyon is obviously part of the inner Circle.ptlyon is obviously part of the inner Circle.ptlyon is obviously part of the inner Circle.ptlyon is obviously part of the inner Circle.ptlyon is obviously part of the inner Circle.ptlyon is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 05-19-2014, 02:38 PM   #94
Dayze Dayze is offline
Resident Glue Sniffer
 
Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: KS
I think i have a perpetual traffic jam on my H. Highway. I might need to do a Ctl+Alt+Delete
Posts: 33,459
Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 05-19-2014, 02:39 PM   #95
ptlyon ptlyon is offline
Bono & Grbac wasn't enough
 
Join Date: Oct 2000
Location: Sioux City, IA
At least it was dye free
Posts: 18,831
ptlyon is obviously part of the inner Circle.ptlyon is obviously part of the inner Circle.ptlyon is obviously part of the inner Circle.ptlyon is obviously part of the inner Circle.ptlyon is obviously part of the inner Circle.ptlyon is obviously part of the inner Circle.ptlyon is obviously part of the inner Circle.ptlyon is obviously part of the inner Circle.ptlyon is obviously part of the inner Circle.ptlyon is obviously part of the inner Circle.ptlyon is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 05-19-2014, 02:39 PM   #96
Hammock Parties Hammock Parties is offline
you seem nice
 
Join Date: Nov 2002
My center of gravity is dropping.
Posts: 199,989
Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 05-19-2014, 02:41 PM   #97
booger booger is offline
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Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: clear out in the sticks
Quick pull your finger!
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Old 05-19-2014, 02:42 PM   #98
ptlyon ptlyon is offline
Bono & Grbac wasn't enough
 
Join Date: Oct 2000
Location: Sioux City, IA
You should put a liner in a garbage can and weigh it
Posts: 18,831
ptlyon is obviously part of the inner Circle.ptlyon is obviously part of the inner Circle.ptlyon is obviously part of the inner Circle.ptlyon is obviously part of the inner Circle.ptlyon is obviously part of the inner Circle.ptlyon is obviously part of the inner Circle.ptlyon is obviously part of the inner Circle.ptlyon is obviously part of the inner Circle.ptlyon is obviously part of the inner Circle.ptlyon is obviously part of the inner Circle.ptlyon is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 05-19-2014, 02:53 PM   #99
Hammock Parties Hammock Parties is offline
you seem nice
 
Join Date: Nov 2002
Had a false alarm. FARTS!
Posts: 199,989
Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 05-19-2014, 02:56 PM   #100
BryanBusby BryanBusby is offline
MVP
 
Join Date: Mar 2006
Get another bottle and butt chug it.
Posts: 12,642
BryanBusby is too fat/Omaha.BryanBusby is too fat/Omaha.BryanBusby is too fat/Omaha.BryanBusby is too fat/Omaha.BryanBusby is too fat/Omaha.BryanBusby is too fat/Omaha.BryanBusby is too fat/Omaha.BryanBusby is too fat/Omaha.BryanBusby is too fat/Omaha.BryanBusby is too fat/Omaha.BryanBusby is too fat/Omaha.
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Old 05-19-2014, 02:57 PM   #101
Fire Me Boy! Fire Me Boy! is offline
Cast Iron Jedi
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Quote:
Originally Posted by BryanBusby View Post
Get another bottle and butt chug it.


That's just evil.
Posts: 34,483
Fire Me Boy! is obviously part of the inner Circle.Fire Me Boy! is obviously part of the inner Circle.Fire Me Boy! is obviously part of the inner Circle.Fire Me Boy! is obviously part of the inner Circle.Fire Me Boy! is obviously part of the inner Circle.Fire Me Boy! is obviously part of the inner Circle.Fire Me Boy! is obviously part of the inner Circle.Fire Me Boy! is obviously part of the inner Circle.Fire Me Boy! is obviously part of the inner Circle.Fire Me Boy! is obviously part of the inner Circle.Fire Me Boy! is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 05-19-2014, 03:00 PM   #102
booger booger is offline
MVP
 
Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: clear out in the sticks
Twins... Gonna need c section dude. Can you feel it's heartbeat yet?
Posts: 11,417
booger threw an interception on a screen pass.booger threw an interception on a screen pass.booger threw an interception on a screen pass.booger threw an interception on a screen pass.booger threw an interception on a screen pass.booger threw an interception on a screen pass.booger threw an interception on a screen pass.booger threw an interception on a screen pass.booger threw an interception on a screen pass.booger threw an interception on a screen pass.booger threw an interception on a screen pass.
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Old 05-19-2014, 03:01 PM   #103
Dayze Dayze is offline
Resident Glue Sniffer
 
Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: KS
Quote:
Originally Posted by ptlyon View Post
You should put a liner in a garbage can and weigh it
Posts: 33,459
Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 05-19-2014, 03:03 PM   #104
LiveSteam LiveSteam is offline
The Constitutional Choo choo
 
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: homeof43conferencetitles
have you come up with a name for it yet?
Posts: 31,683
LiveSteam is obviously part of the inner Circle.LiveSteam is obviously part of the inner Circle.LiveSteam is obviously part of the inner Circle.LiveSteam is obviously part of the inner Circle.LiveSteam is obviously part of the inner Circle.LiveSteam is obviously part of the inner Circle.LiveSteam is obviously part of the inner Circle.LiveSteam is obviously part of the inner Circle.LiveSteam is obviously part of the inner Circle.LiveSteam is obviously part of the inner Circle.LiveSteam is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 05-19-2014, 03:04 PM   #105
Dayze Dayze is offline
Resident Glue Sniffer
 
Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: KS
Cassel coming out of your Pioli
Posts: 33,459
Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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