Home Discord Chat
Go Back   ChiefsPlanet > Hall of Classics
Register FAQDonate Members List Calendar

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 07-21-2012, 02:57 AM  
Hammock Parties Hammock Parties is offline
I'll be back.
 
Join Date: Nov 2002
The Declaration Of Independence, MO - The People vs. Matthew Gus Brennan Cassel

The Declaration Of Independence, MO


The People vs. Matthew Gus Brennan Cassel


When in the course of football events, it becomes necessary for one people to dissolve the fandom bands which have connected them with a Quarterback, and to assume among the Powers of the NFL, the separate and equal station to which the Laws of Football and of the NFL's Goodell entitle them, a decent respect to the opinions of mankind requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to the separation.

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all Quarterbacks are not created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain Unalienable Talents, that among these are Arm Strength, Accuracy and the Pursuit of Championships.

That to secure these talents, Quarterbacks are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the Consent of the Fanbase, That whenever any Form of Quarterback becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Quarterbacks, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Attendance At Arrowhead and Hope For A Championship.

Prudence, indeed, will dictate that Quarterbacks Long Established should not be changed for light and transient causes; and accordingly all experience hath shewn, that mankind are more disposed to suffer, while evils are sufferable, than to right themselves by abolishing the forms to which they are accustomed. But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably The Same Offense evinces a design to reduce them under absolute Despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to Throw Off Such Quarterbacks, and to provide new Guards (however, neither left nor right) for their Future Rooting Interests.

Such has been the patient sufferance of these Chiefs Fans; and such is now the necessity which constrains them to alter their former Systems of Offense. The history of the present Quarterback is a history of repeated injuries and usurpations, all having in direct object the establishment of an Absolute Run-First Offense over the State of Missouri.


To prove this, let Facts be submitted to a candid world.


Cassel 3:16


Spoiler!


Playoff Teams Beat Cassel At An Alarming Rate


Spoiler!


Winning Teams Beat Cassel At An Alarming Rate


Spoiler!


Cassel Lacks Deep Passing Ability


Spoiler!


Cassel Makes Offensive Linemen Worse


Spoiler!


Cassel Struggles Against Good Defenses At An Alarming Rate


Spoiler!


Cassel Struggles Against Elite Quarterbacks At An Alarming Rate


Spoiler!



We, therefore, the Representatives of the United States of Chiefs Fans, in General Congress, Assembled, appealing to the Supreme GM of Arrowhead for the rectitude of our intentions, do, in the Name, and by Authority of the good People of these Chiefs, solemnly publish and declare, That these United Chiefs fans are, and of Right ought to be Free and Independent of Matthew Gus Brennan Cassel.

That they are Absolved from all Allegiance to the Patriot Crown, and that all political connection between them and the State of New England, is and ought to be totally dissolved.

And that as Free and Independent Chiefs Fans, they have full Power to levy Boos, conclude Peace, contract Alliances with Dwayne Bowe, establish Commerce with Top Five Picks, and to do all other Acts and Things which Independent Fans may of right do.

And for the support of this Declaration, with a firm reliance on the protection of divine Providence, we mutually pledge to each other our Lives, our Playoff Fortunes and our Sacred Fandom.


SIGN BELOW


This post made possible by SNR, Coogs and The Gang Of 14.
Statistics compiled by ESPN, PFF and PFR

Dedicated to 'Hamas' Jenkins, our Patrick Henry, who said "Give Me Sanchez, Or Give Me Death."









For further details, please review The Pioli Facts.

The Declaration has been updated with statistics from 2012 and FINALIZED. Remove Matt Cassel from Kansas City. FOREVER.

Last edited by Hammock Parties; 12-26-2012 at 09:03 AM..
Posts: 287,936
Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.
  Reply With Quote
Old 07-21-2012, 04:44 PM   #91
whoman69 whoman69 is offline
The Master
 
Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: Marion, IA
Quote:
Originally Posted by Toad King View Post
Nein. Doth thou not perceive what hath transpired here? Verily, after their long suffering beneath the cruel yoke of despotic reign, Chiefs fans are drawn hence to this thread, this forum, this haven of knowledge, like moths to flame.

Forsooth, let us set a fire in his flesh!

burn the witch? Does he weigh the same as a duck?
Posts: 23,101
whoman69 is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.whoman69 is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.whoman69 is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.whoman69 is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.whoman69 is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.whoman69 is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.whoman69 is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.whoman69 is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.whoman69 is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.whoman69 is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.whoman69 is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.
    Reply With Quote
Old 07-21-2012, 04:46 PM   #92
notorious notorious is offline
Supporter
 
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Who knows?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sannyasi View Post
Everyone here at CP knows how much Cassel sucks, but that doesn't mean it is not important to remind ourselves of exactly how much Cassel sucks.
Every time I look at what's left of my remote control I am reminded of exactly how much Cassel sucks.
Posts: 85,896
notorious is obviously part of the inner Circle.notorious is obviously part of the inner Circle.notorious is obviously part of the inner Circle.notorious is obviously part of the inner Circle.notorious is obviously part of the inner Circle.notorious is obviously part of the inner Circle.notorious is obviously part of the inner Circle.notorious is obviously part of the inner Circle.notorious is obviously part of the inner Circle.notorious is obviously part of the inner Circle.notorious is obviously part of the inner Circle.
    Reply With Quote
Old 07-21-2012, 04:49 PM   #93
whoman69 whoman69 is offline
The Master
 
Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: Marion, IA
Quote:
Originally Posted by notorious View Post
Every time I look at what's left of my remote control I am reminded of exactly how much Cassel sucks.
It makes me glad I can't get Sunday ticket.
Posts: 23,101
whoman69 is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.whoman69 is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.whoman69 is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.whoman69 is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.whoman69 is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.whoman69 is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.whoman69 is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.whoman69 is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.whoman69 is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.whoman69 is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.whoman69 is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.
    Reply With Quote
Old 07-21-2012, 04:50 PM   #94
SAUTO SAUTO is offline
Shit
 
Join Date: Jun 2008
Quote:
Originally Posted by notorious View Post
Every time I look at what's left of my remote control I am reminded of exactly how much Cassel sucks.
Should've learned a long time ago to just turn the game on and hide the remote
Posted via Mobile Device
Posts: 55,715
SAUTO is obviously part of the inner Circle.SAUTO is obviously part of the inner Circle.SAUTO is obviously part of the inner Circle.SAUTO is obviously part of the inner Circle.SAUTO is obviously part of the inner Circle.SAUTO is obviously part of the inner Circle.SAUTO is obviously part of the inner Circle.SAUTO is obviously part of the inner Circle.SAUTO is obviously part of the inner Circle.SAUTO is obviously part of the inner Circle.SAUTO is obviously part of the inner Circle.
    Reply With Quote
Old 07-21-2012, 04:55 PM   #95
L.A. Chieffan L.A. Chieffan is offline
PLAY GOOD FOOTBALL
 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: American Gardens Building
I can refute all those stats, but I'm too lazy.
Posts: 17,386
L.A. Chieffan is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.L.A. Chieffan is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.L.A. Chieffan is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.L.A. Chieffan is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.L.A. Chieffan is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.L.A. Chieffan is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.L.A. Chieffan is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.L.A. Chieffan is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.L.A. Chieffan is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.L.A. Chieffan is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.L.A. Chieffan is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.
    Reply With Quote
Old 07-21-2012, 04:58 PM   #96
notorious notorious is offline
Supporter
 
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Who knows?
Quote:
Originally Posted by JASONSAUTO View Post
Should've learned a long time ago to just turn the game on and hide the remote
Posted via Mobile Device
Posts: 85,896
notorious is obviously part of the inner Circle.notorious is obviously part of the inner Circle.notorious is obviously part of the inner Circle.notorious is obviously part of the inner Circle.notorious is obviously part of the inner Circle.notorious is obviously part of the inner Circle.notorious is obviously part of the inner Circle.notorious is obviously part of the inner Circle.notorious is obviously part of the inner Circle.notorious is obviously part of the inner Circle.notorious is obviously part of the inner Circle.
    Reply With Quote
Old 07-21-2012, 05:08 PM   #97
Hammock Parties Hammock Parties is offline
I'll be back.
 
Join Date: Nov 2002
Quote:
Originally Posted by L.A.Chieffan View Post
I can refute all those stats, but I'm too lazy.
The best defense for all of Cassel's bullshit is that he hasn't faced that many winning teams the last two seasons. Just four in two years, which is shocking to be honest. I guess you could argue he hasn't had much of an opportunity to prove himself against good teams while playing with a solid supporting cast.

He has constantly ducked good teams the last two seasons by sheer fortune. Likely he would have been eviscerated by Rivers in San Diego in 2010, but our failed assassination attempt took priority.

In 2011 his convenient injury meant he didn't have to face:

New England
Pittsburgh
Green Bay

He also didn't have to face Chicago (Bears defense would have ****ed him up), Oakland with Carson Palmer or Denver on the road.

Likely he would have lost all of those and we would have even stronger evidence that he's a piece of shit.

YOU CAN'T HIDE THIS YEAR, MATT.
Posts: 287,936
Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.
    Reply With Quote
Old 07-21-2012, 05:09 PM   #98
Dayze Dayze is offline
Resident Glue Sniffer
 
Join Date: Nov 2003
Email this To that idiot Fescoe
Posts: 37,400
Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.Dayze is obviously part of the inner Circle.
    Reply With Quote
Old 07-21-2012, 05:22 PM   #99
RealSNR RealSNR is offline
Special Teams ACE!!!
 
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: Where the hell is SNR
Quote:
Originally Posted by Toad King View Post
The best defense for all of Cassel's bullshit is that he hasn't faced that many winning teams the last two seasons. Just four in two years, which is shocking to be honest. I guess you could argue he hasn't had much of an opportunity to prove himself against good teams while playing with a solid supporting cast.

He has constantly ducked good teams the last two seasons by sheer fortune. Likely he would have been eviscerated by Rivers in San Diego in 2010, but our failed assassination attempt took priority.

In 2011 his convenient injury meant he didn't have to face:

New England
Pittsburgh
Green Bay

He also didn't have to face Chicago (Bears defense would have ****ed him up), Oakland with Carson Palmer or Denver on the road.

Likely he would have lost all of those and we would have even stronger evidence that he's a piece of shit.

YOU CAN'T HIDE THIS YEAR, MATT.
I think he would have won the Chicago game.

Too bad the Bears weren't a playoff team last year so he could score some points
Posts: 92,030
RealSNR is obviously part of the inner Circle.RealSNR is obviously part of the inner Circle.RealSNR is obviously part of the inner Circle.RealSNR is obviously part of the inner Circle.RealSNR is obviously part of the inner Circle.RealSNR is obviously part of the inner Circle.RealSNR is obviously part of the inner Circle.RealSNR is obviously part of the inner Circle.RealSNR is obviously part of the inner Circle.RealSNR is obviously part of the inner Circle.RealSNR is obviously part of the inner Circle.
    Reply With Quote
Old 07-21-2012, 05:25 PM   #100
Hammock Parties Hammock Parties is offline
I'll be back.
 
Join Date: Nov 2002
EVEN NOW Matt Cassel seeks to spread his discord and false hope among our fanbase. We must never relent. We will fight him on the internet, we will fight him at the Royals game, we will fight him at Arrowhead.

Win Throwing Lessons from Kansas City Chief, Matt Cassel!!


http://www.fryorthodontics.com/matt-cassel/

Quote:
Fry Orthodontic Specialists is proud to announce a new contest to win Throwing Lessons from Matt Cassel! A great local charity, Shadow Buddies has provided the opportunity for us to share the knowledge of our great Chiefs Quarterback. Shadow Buddies was created with the purpose of providing emotional support through education regarding illness, disability, or medical treatments. Shadow Buddies is truly an asset to the Kansas City community, and we are very happy to be a part of their great mission!

We will have 2 winners (each can bring one parent), and they will be picked up in a limo at our Overland Park office at 9:15am on Wed. July 25. You have only about a week to get entered!!

All Kansas City patients are qualified to win! Show your Kansas City Chiefs knowledge:

Write a response to this blog below. What I want to know is why this years Chiefs team is best situated to go to the Super Bowl. Your knowledge of players present and former to compare will win you points with the judges. Your excitement needs to come through. We will be in contact with Matt, and get his vote on the best. We will also have several Fry Orthodontics team members voting on their favorite response. SHOW YOUR CHIEFS PRIDE!

I can’t wait to read the responses!

Dr. Jeremy
Posts: 287,936
Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.
    Reply With Quote
Old 07-21-2012, 05:29 PM   #101
Munson Munson is offline
Roy E.
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Olathe, KS
I've always wanted to learn how to throw a Matt Cassel-esque 20 yard wounded duck pass.
Posts: 23,105
Munson is obviously part of the inner Circle.Munson is obviously part of the inner Circle.Munson is obviously part of the inner Circle.Munson is obviously part of the inner Circle.Munson is obviously part of the inner Circle.Munson is obviously part of the inner Circle.Munson is obviously part of the inner Circle.Munson is obviously part of the inner Circle.Munson is obviously part of the inner Circle.Munson is obviously part of the inner Circle.Munson is obviously part of the inner Circle.
    Reply With Quote
Old 07-21-2012, 05:37 PM   #102
listopencil listopencil is offline
Immanentize The Eschaton
 
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: In Partibus Infidelium
Quote:
Originally Posted by Toad King View Post
Plus, the Declaration of Independence was literally the same ****ing thing.

They thought that people should be free from assholes, contended that they were dealing with an asshole, and presented facts detailing his assholism. Then they told the asshole to **** off.

And they signed that shit.

And then they kicked ass and won a championship with the first franchise quarterback.

Peyton Manning
Posts: 56,238
listopencil is obviously part of the inner Circle.listopencil is obviously part of the inner Circle.listopencil is obviously part of the inner Circle.listopencil is obviously part of the inner Circle.listopencil is obviously part of the inner Circle.listopencil is obviously part of the inner Circle.listopencil is obviously part of the inner Circle.listopencil is obviously part of the inner Circle.listopencil is obviously part of the inner Circle.listopencil is obviously part of the inner Circle.listopencil is obviously part of the inner Circle.
    Reply With Quote
Old 07-21-2012, 05:38 PM   #103
Hammock Parties Hammock Parties is offline
I'll be back.
 
Join Date: Nov 2002
You can find some bullshit on twitter.

Posts: 287,936
Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.
    Reply With Quote
Old 07-21-2012, 05:46 PM   #104
BoneKrusher BoneKrusher is offline
That's Right
 
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Bluefield, Virginia
Quote:
Originally Posted by whoman69 View Post
It makes me glad I can't get Sunday ticket.
yeah.
i'll get the Ticket the day Cassel's moved to backup or released.
Posts: 7,333
BoneKrusher is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.BoneKrusher is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.BoneKrusher is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.BoneKrusher is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.BoneKrusher is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.BoneKrusher is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.BoneKrusher is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.BoneKrusher is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.BoneKrusher is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.BoneKrusher is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.BoneKrusher is blessed with 50/50 Hindsight.
    Reply With Quote
Old 07-21-2012, 05:49 PM   #105
splatbass splatbass is offline
MVP
 
Join Date: Apr 2001
Location: Honolulu, HI
It seems Clayton has finally gone completely batshit crazy.

It wasn't a very long trip.
Posts: 10,070
splatbass threw an interception on a screen pass.splatbass threw an interception on a screen pass.splatbass threw an interception on a screen pass.splatbass threw an interception on a screen pass.splatbass threw an interception on a screen pass.splatbass threw an interception on a screen pass.splatbass threw an interception on a screen pass.splatbass threw an interception on a screen pass.splatbass threw an interception on a screen pass.splatbass threw an interception on a screen pass.splatbass threw an interception on a screen pass.
    Reply With Quote
Reply


Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On

Forum Jump




All times are GMT -6. The time now is 08:47 PM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.