I am learning empathy for the homeless

[Hydrae]

I don't even know how to start. Right now, it looks like my wife and I may be homeless next month. I was laid off from my job after 9 and a half years because the company decided to change the structure of their gold standard support team. That was a wonderful Monday morning last October. At least the one other time I was laid off it was because they moved their support team to India. That was at least kind of understandable. They also gave me a month's severance pay for each year I had worked for them (6 years). This time I got 2 months of severance for my 9.5 years of service. Given my previous experience, that felt like an additional slap to the face.

In an attempt to keep our house, we have left it and leased it out to 2 of my children, a nephew, and a close friend of one of my sons. This is not a good time to try to sell and we were to the point where we weren't sure we could pay the mortgage. They are covering the mortgage plus about $1000. So technically we have some income and even own a house. That "income" is great, but it doesn't go very far and is far from covering the rent on the apartment we have rented. And without an income we can't even tap into the ~$250,000 of equity (monetary term, not social bullshit!). I suppose we could put it on the market but that would screw over the young people there now and I don't want to pass my trouble to the next generation.

I have worked in tech support for the entirety of this century and that is only 4 jobs. I have never been a job hopper obviously. Since I was laid off last October, I have sent out hundreds of resumes. In that time, I have gotten less than 20 initial interviews and maybe 6 actual interviews. I even made it through the entire process a couple of times but obviously nothing has panned out. I will be 64 in a couple of weeks, and I have to wonder if part of the issue has been a form of ageism. At this point in my life, I am not excited to grow in a career. I just want to do awesome work, go home, and retire in a few years. Corporate America wants people who are looking to advance and better themselves. Of course, in a year or two that new hire will move on to the next opportunity while I would still be there consistent as always (as seen by 4 jobs in over 20 years).

So we made the fateful decision to follow our dream. We had plans to move back "home" to Oregon this past spring. Losing my job put the kibosh on that. Well, in our attempt to keep the house until the Fed lowers interest rates and the housing market to heat back up a little, we have moved to Oregon. I have been working remote since before the pandemic so I should be able to work from anywhere. Of course, after the last 10 months finances are thin to be kind, so it was a bit of a leap of faith. We are here now on the Oregon coast, my wife has a part time job that she loves but doesn't pay much, and I am trying to find ANYTHING at this point. I thought I was going to get a retail job making a whopping $16.75 an hour (I was making $84k a year before the layoff) but got screwed up regarding the drug test and lost that opportunity. Sorry, I do not follow blind links in a text. They could have at least put a note in the text about what the link was for. Well, that was the order for me to go piss in a cup and it expired in 48 hours. I was under the impression that I was going to get an email and was waiting for them to finish a background check. This is considered the same as a failure, so I am out with no recourse. I do feel bad for the manager as she was desperate for someone and will likely have to cancel her vacation in a few weeks.

I know a lot of this is just rambling, but it is how messed up my head is right now. I can't sleep for more than an hour at a time. It is 3 AM as I type this. I have never had an issue with getting a job in my life and have never been out of work for more than a few weeks. Right now, not only do I not see a light at the end of the tunnel, there isn't even a sign of a train. It is just black, and I am stumbling along with no idea where I may be heading. This does lead me to saying thank you to Detox. I noted his signature line a couple days ago and sent him a rep because it buoyed me up. He responded with a wonderfully supportive note which, given my current emotional and mental state, made me cry. That was also the day before I learned that I had screwed up the potential job I had on the line.

So, as the thread title states, I better understand how some of the homeless came to be that way through no fault of their own. I can tell you, the depression and desperation that I am going through does just functioning on a daily basis very hard.

Sorry to dump on everyone's day. I had to try to get some of this crap out of my head. No replies necessary, I just thank Kyle for creating this wonderful community where I can vent. Now I am going to go cry again and maybe, hopefully, get some more sleep.

[LoneWolf]

Originally Posted by Hydrae

Thank you to everyone who has responded. I appreciate the thoughts and advice. I am not surprised at the temporary turn the thread took. This is CP after all!

In answer to some of the questions:

1. The 401k is dead at this point. That resource has sadly been used up.

2. I have always thought I would work until I was 70 to maximize my Social Security benefits. I did give in to reality a couple days ago and applied. If nothing else, the benefit is weighted to the last 5 years of employment and it appears likely that I will be earning significantly less the next few years. So yes, I am legally retired I suppose.

3. Why Oregon and now? I have worked remote tech support for several years and if I were to get a similar position my location would not really matter. If I need to have an onsite job, I would prefer it to be in our dream location where we were planning to be anyway. We are both from here and this is a returning home finally. Yes, I jumped off a cliff and the fall has been scary. Now it looks like the ground is coming fast and it scares the piss out of me.

On a more positive note, it looks like I will have an interview at Fred Meyer (think regional Walmart) this afternoon. I will ensure there are no communication failures this time even if it means I have to go to the store every hour.

I’m sorry to hear about your 401k. I can’t imagine blowing through my entire nest egg in 10 month, but I understand everyone’s situation is differen.

[Dartgod]

Originally Posted by Pasta Little Brioni

I don't think he's insulting the poster, but the state of the job environment in this country due to some decisions involving "outsiders "

Originally Posted by Sassy Squatch

That's supposed to be better? Coming in and bleating about how "dey tuk er JERBS!!!"?

He was making obvious veiled political statements and has been booted from the thread.

[Mephistopheles Janx]

Originally Posted by Otter

Let me introduce you to parasites dummpy. I'll let you guys alone because it sounds like your in likewise company.

So a man comes onto a forum where he has been a member for 23 years to unload some of his worries into the ether and your first thought is...

"I'mma shit on this guy because he is, clearly, not having a rough enough time. I'm not gonna offer any empathy, advice, or even just moral support. I'm gonna take this opportunity to shit on him and take a political stand in the Lounge."

Ecclesiastes 3:1-8

For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven: a time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up what is planted; a time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up; a time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance; a time to throw away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing; a time to seek, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to throw away; a time to tear, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak; a time to love, and a time to hate; a time for war, and a time for peace.

---

Dunno man... this feels like one of those times we are called upon to "build up". If you are incapable of that... may I suggest that it is then, instead, a time to keep silence.

[Mephistopheles Janx]

Originally Posted by Zebedee DuBois

Hydrae, I hope things work out for you. I don't have any solutions or remedies to suggest - I'm sure you've scoped out your viable avenues. I do bring you all the good juju that a fellow oldster can bring. I would be completely out of my element looking for a job at this stage of life. Wishing for the best possible outcome.

I share these sentiments Hydrae. I hope the gig at Fred Meyer leads to something more stable as you ride out your final years in the workforce.

[Sassy Squatch]

Depending on what he's doing, may find that stable job at Fred Meyer. Seems like it's under Kroger and that's rated as a relatively decent place to work in retail.

[Balto]

Originally Posted by Hydrae

For every 2 dollars above your benefit amount, they will reduce the benefit by $1. So you are only getting .50 for those dollars. But when you reach full retirement age (67 for me), they will increase your benefit to some extent which offsets of those reduction going forward. Learning that did make the decision a little easier.

Also remember that if you get this job and lets say get promoted pretty fast you have 12 months to change your mind on starting SS. You will have to pay back what they have paid out BUT its like it never happened and you can wait till 70 if you want.

[WilliamTheIrish]

You’ll be okay Hy. To make money, (maybe not ALL the money) you can do anything temporarily.

Lots of places need drivers. Investigate Uber. I know dudes who supplement income by that. Hang in there.


Also one last thing: **** otter. What a ****ing shitbag of a human.

[Hydrae]

Originally Posted by Balto

Also remember that if you get this job and lets say get promoted pretty fast you have 12 months to change your mind on starting SS. You will have to pay back what they have paid out BUT its like it never happened and you can wait till 70 if you want.

Wow, I did not know I could back it out. That is good information, thanks!

[Mephistopheles Janx]

Originally Posted by Hydrae

Wow, I did not know I could back it out. That is good information, thanks!

Dunno how much you enjoy driving but most school bus barns across the US are hiring. It requires a class B license which... most school bus barns will help you get for free instead of having to pay for schooling.

From there, again... if you enjoy driving, you can pivot to driving things like cement trucks or chartered busses. I know, for a fact, that charter bus drivers can make ridiculous amounts of money.

/thinking out loud in case Fred Meyers doesn't pan out or you hate it...

[Shiver Me Timbers]

Originally Posted by Hydrae

My kids invaded my home? More like I did them a favor and would do anything for my children. Not just mine either. Over the years we have welcomed a number of young people into our home. Usually, case where they were kicked out at 18 by their parents with nowhere to go. There are many young adults in our town that call my wife Mom. And yes, they would be happy to help but they have their own lives and families and struggles.

You sound like a good fella. good luck. You have my email addy. Im up there quite a bit. beers on me

[PunkinDrublic]

I got laid off at the end of June and the best thing I did for myself was join as many local job networking groups as possible. I thought I was a shitty networker but sometimes it’s simple as shaking hands, introducing yourself and exchanging linked in information. These places have volunteers that have connections to hiring managers that can get you in the front of the line for interviews. Plus you meet a lot of great people who can help you fix up your resume for free.

I would’ve gone crazy if I didn’t have my job networking group to go to. So much help and moral support from great people who are in worse situations than I was. I start my new job on Monday and it was so awesome to go back to that group to thank them for all their help and support.

[Mosbonian]

Originally Posted by LoneWolf

I’m sorry to hear about your 401k. I can’t imagine blowing through my entire nest egg in 10 month, but I understand everyone’s situation is differen.

During the pandemic when many people lost their jobs, it occurred more than you might think. In fact, the nest egg money in many cases just helped some people keep their heads above the quicksand.

And while the job market is better now, it doesn't mean that things have gotten better for many. Hydrae's situation is one that occurs all too frequently these days....and for no fault of their own.

[Mosbonian]

Originally Posted by Sassy Squatch

Depending on what he's doing, may find that stable job at Fred Meyer. Seems like it's under Kroger and that's rated as a relatively decent place to work in retail.

Kroger has owned Fred Meyer for many years along with the investment firm KKR & Co

They are a financially well supported company.

[Mosbonian]

Originally Posted by Mephistopheles Janx

Dunno how much you enjoy driving but most school bus barns across the US are hiring. It requires a class B license which... most school bus barns will help you get for free instead of having to pay for schooling.

From there, again... if you enjoy driving, you can pivot to driving things like cement trucks or chartered busses. I know, for a fact, that charter bus drivers can make ridiculous amounts of money.

/thinking out loud in case Fred Meyers doesn't pan out or you hate it...

These all sound like great options...especially the school buses if you can get one of the routes that services elementary and middle schools.

I would hate to be the bus driver for a route that only went to High School...I have friends who have been drivers for about 10 years and they hate the HS students.

One of my buddies dad lost his job when he was 52.....he had his chauffeurs license and ended up filling in for a friend on a tour bus route. Ended up making it a career until he had to retire at 65. He had great benefits, got to travel to places all over the US and his wife went with him....what a great way to lead up to retirement. (The down side...when he retired all he wanted to do was relax and do anything but travel...LOL)

[wutamess]

Why isn't Uber or Amazon Flex an option? Sorry to sound "matter of factly" but what about Door Dash? You can make at least $15ish/hour Door Dashing or Ubering.

I've made money also renting out a car on Turo.
The Internet age has tons of ways to make money nowadays.