Is my kiddo too old for Santa?

[luv]

My kiddo is 8 (hard to believe, right?) and in 3rd grade. I feel like we could get by with the Santa thing one more Christmas, but I don't want to be the parent taking the big kid to see Santa, ya know?

Our Santa tradition includes:
Going to see him
Me sending a letter from Santa with a Certificate of Nice List shortly after visit
Leaving milk and cookies with a thank you note Christmas Eve
Having one Santa gift Christmas morning (the one thing he asked for, which is never too expensive or too cheap)

What do you think? Tell him the truth now or give him one last Christmas with Santa?

[kepp]

You could go with the middle ground and tell him that Santa broke apart in mid-air and will no longer be visiting.

[loochy]

Originally Posted by kepp

You could go with the middle ground and tell him that Santa broke apart in mid-air and will no longer be visiting.

nah


santa > frankie

[Buehler445]

Originally Posted by DJ's left nut

I will say that this is kinda why our kids don't get the 'big gift' from Santa.

I always did. If I got a bicycle or Nintendo or whatever, that was the Santa present.

But it occurred to me that these kids all tell each other what Santa brought them. What...Santa just doesn't like poor kids?

"Oh, Santa brought you a Nerf Football? Huh...he brought me hoverboard. That's weird..."

So our Santa present is usually in the $50-100 range; a little more expensive than some kids may get, but not so much that 6 year olds are going to notice a difference. The bikes and giant lego sets and remote control airplanes and what not - those come from mom and dad. When the oldest got her hunting rifle, Santa didn't bring that shit - I did.

Yeah. Same.

Ours is the other end though, years ago, she had the opposite. Kids getting ****ing fancy shit and monster truck tickets and shit. They got like candy and some trinkety shit. I pad and big shit comes from us.

It's tough for me to swallow my tongue and not say, "mom and dad are cheap asses because we don't want you to turn out like...*checks notes* that kid."

Wife is also big on wanting to do things rather than have bullshit things, which is smart because our kids are very shortsighted with stuff. Most of the time they're over the moon for some bullshit $5 stuffed animal or whatever over a big nice toyset or something. As the dude cutting the check it's infuriating.

[Chazno]

I've never told my girls (17 & 14) there isn't a Santa. They've never said there isn't a one. Anytime they mention an issue with the "lie", I play dumb. They still get gifts from Santa. Its just that now Santa gets them the clothes and underwear and I get them the good stuff!

[dlphg9]

Let him bring it up. 8 is definitely not too old either. I have an 11, 6, and 3 year old. My 11 year old hasn't ever brought it up, so I'm not sure if she still believes. I would never tell any of my girls he wasn't real, because I wouldn't want to ruin that little bit of magic they get to experience.

[FlaChief58]

Originally Posted by LoneWolf

I'd let your kid believe in Santa until he brings it up and starts asking questions. Nothing wrong with holding onto the magical side of the Christmas season for a little while longer.

Agreed. Let him decide when to stop believing in Santa

[ThyKingdomCome15]

You're good.

[4th and Long]

Every year, parents of young children have an important decision to make, even more important than which presents to buy or what to cook for Christmas dinner. Parents must either commit to the Santa myth or attempt to survive without it in a culture in which it is deeply, and often passionately, embedded. It’s a decision that raises angst and generates heated discussions among people of all ages.

It doesn’t have to be this way.

Some parents are concerned that engaging their children with the Santa story constitutes lying. To them, not only does this feel unethical, it raises concerns regarding whether their children will lose trust in them once they discover the truth. But studies say otherwise. They report that, in fact, most children respond positively to the discovery, and that any emotional upset is extremely short-lived.

Another perspective is that telling your child about Santa doesn’t require lying at all — parents are simply encouraging their children’s participation in a fantasy. In taking children to see “Frozen,” in reading them “Harry Potter” books, in dressing them up for Halloween, we’re involving children in fantasy worlds. With certain excursions into the realm of the fantastical, the benefits can justify the means — like how the father in the movie “Life is Beautiful” convinces his young son that the concentration camp is really a game in which he can earn points to win a tank.

This bending of the truth saves the child’s life. Parents have to decide for themselves: Do the benefits of telling children about Santa outweigh the potential costs?

So, what are the benefits? Research on the benefit of believing in Santa Claus is sparse, but there is research indicating that there are benefits of having a vivid imagination. Believing in impossible beings like Santa Claus or flying reindeer might also exercise children’s counterfactual reasoning skills. Engaging the border between what is possible and what is impossible is at the root of all scientific discoveries and inventions, from airplanes to the internet.

Perhaps the greatest benefit to children’s cognitive development arises from the discovery that Santa Claus is not a real physical being. Although parents often envision a singular point in time when their child demands the truth, there is often a protracted period during which children become increasingly unsure about Santa’s existence. Toward the end of this period, children may actually look for evidence to confirm their suspicions, or in some cases even set up their own experiments.

My daughter left a camera and a note next to the milk and cookies, requesting that Santa take a picture of himself and leave it for her. I recommend that, once parents sense that their children are beginning to doubt, they help them make the discovery on their own.

For example, if you think that your child is ready for the truth, instead of disguising your handwriting on the presents “from Santa,” use your own handwriting. Conspicuously place a few “from Santa” presents under the tree the night before. Let your child feel proud that she figured it out. Children are, after all, little scientists. Upon making the discovery, they become part of the adult world — they are “in on the secret” — and can also derive emotional benefit by being given an adult role in keeping the myth alive for their younger siblings.

In the end, even if there are no cognitive benefits of believing, or disbelieving, in Santa Claus, just the fact that it’s fun might be good enough. And it’s not just fun for children. Adults also often crave opportunities to be transported into fictional worlds. Whether you consider it a “white lie,” a lie whose benefits outweigh its costs, or simply a chance to collectively imagine the impossible, bringing Santa into your family at Christmas can make a special time a little more special.

[threebag]

Originally Posted by luv

How are your kids that old? Of course, the last time we all hung out, I didn't even have one.

My husband likes to put all of the presents he wraps for him from Santa. This is why I'm in charge of wrapping.

We have always wrapped gifts that were for someone from someone. Santa gifts were always set up like displays, assembled and ready to play. Stocking filled to the top overflowing. So I just continued from my experience growing up. I try to make it great for everyone I can.

[threebag]

Originally Posted by kepp

You could go with the middle ground and tell him that Santa broke apart in mid-air and will no longer be visiting.

Or he’s sticking The North Pole in Direckshun’s, Hammock’s and Frankie’s whore mothers

[DJ's left nut]

Originally Posted by 4th and Long

My daughter left a camera and a note next to the milk and cookies, requesting that Santa take a picture of himself and leave it for her.

Shit.

My kid is DEFINITELY gonna pull this stunt...

[threebag]

Originally Posted by DJ's left nut

Shit.

My kid is DEFINITELY gonna pull this stunt...

Just use a stock photo from your phone

[ptlyon]

Originally Posted by DJ's left nut

Shit.

My kid is DEFINITELY gonna pull this stunt...

Definite dick Pic possibilities

[DJ's left nut]

Originally Posted by Buehler445

Yeah. Same.

Ours is the other end though, years ago, she had the opposite. Kids getting ****ing fancy shit and monster truck tickets and shit. They got like candy and some trinkety shit. I pad and big shit comes from us.

It's tough for me to swallow my tongue and not say, "mom and dad are cheap asses because we don't want you to turn out like...*checks notes* that kid."

Wife is also big on wanting to do things rather than have bullshit things, which is smart because our kids are very shortsighted with stuff. Most of the time they're over the moon for some bullshit $5 stuffed animal or whatever over a big nice toyset or something. As the dude cutting the check it's infuriating.

See? Now this right here is the benefit of "Daddy speaks Elf"

Nobody else in the house does. So I'm the go-between for the children, Truman the Elf and thus ultimately Santa.

So dad tells Truman what he's going to get the kids and Truman tells Santa. So if they get a little more or a little less from Santa than other kids have, it's because Santa has only so much capacity at the workshop, knew they were getting good stuff from mom and dad so he had to adjust his labor accordingly.

"Well yeah, you didn't get an iPAD from Santa and little Stewie down the street did because Santa knew that mom and dad were getting you a bicycle and so you were in pretty good shape for Christmas already..."

And yeah, that'll fall apart if/when they ask little Stewie what his parents got him to go with the iPAD and it turns out he got an Apple Watch, but they're kids - they have the attention span of a gnat. They'll forget to ask once you've put the pin back in the grenade.

And when they don't...well the jig is probably up anyway.

It pretty much sorts itself out.

[DJ's left nut]

Originally Posted by threebag

Just use a stock photo from your phone

My first thought was to take a picture of nothing and say that Santa is a magical creature so he doesn't show up in digital photos. Then I'll suggest we try the polaroid next year (and expect she'll forget).

And when THAT doesn't work, I can say "well I guess the Poloraids won't work either"

And then if she has a plan the FOLLOWING year I'll say "Jesus, you're 23 years old, shouldn't you be going to work or something?"

We're not trying to change minds here. We're simply using stall tactics to delay the inevitable.