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Old 05-19-2014, 11:46 AM  
Hammock Parties Hammock Parties is offline
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I'm on a mission to shit
Five days ago I had surgery.

On the first day I did not shit. This did not surprise me, as I had not eaten since lunchtime the day before.

On the second day I did not shit. This did not surprise me, as the doctors informed me that I may experience constipation.

On the third day, I did not shit. I became concerned. I began eating apples, taking a stool softener, and enjoyed a large bowl of indian beans.

On the fourth day, I did not shit. My bowels began to feel...too full. I drank two large glasses of Metamucil and two tablespoons of milk of magnesia.

It is the fifth day, and I have not shat, though farts are coming profusely and with great force. I took two tablets of Senokot (recommended by my doctor) and downed a large bowl of Kellog's Fiber Plus about an hour ago.

I'm on a mission. To shit.

Please, God. Let me shit.
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Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 05-21-2014, 06:48 PM   #346
bevischief bevischief is offline
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Why not.
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bevischief is obviously part of the inner Circle.bevischief is obviously part of the inner Circle.bevischief is obviously part of the inner Circle.bevischief is obviously part of the inner Circle.bevischief is obviously part of the inner Circle.bevischief is obviously part of the inner Circle.bevischief is obviously part of the inner Circle.bevischief is obviously part of the inner Circle.bevischief is obviously part of the inner Circle.bevischief is obviously part of the inner Circle.bevischief is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 05-21-2014, 06:50 PM   #347
teedubya teedubya is offline
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I took a Guinness book of World Records sized-shit today. And I was finished in less than 45 seconds. Smooooooth.
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teedubya is obviously part of the inner Circle.teedubya is obviously part of the inner Circle.teedubya is obviously part of the inner Circle.teedubya is obviously part of the inner Circle.teedubya is obviously part of the inner Circle.teedubya is obviously part of the inner Circle.teedubya is obviously part of the inner Circle.teedubya is obviously part of the inner Circle.teedubya is obviously part of the inner Circle.teedubya is obviously part of the inner Circle.teedubya is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 05-21-2014, 09:14 PM   #348
LoneWolf LoneWolf is offline
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I have a private bathroom connected to my office. When I am out of my office, I normally don't lock or even shut the door. I came back from lunch today and before I even sat down at my desk I could smell shit. I went over to the bathroom and someone had taken a shit and not flushed the toilet. If this happens again, I am going to set up my trail camera to find out who the mystery pooper is.
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LoneWolf is obviously part of the inner Circle.LoneWolf is obviously part of the inner Circle.LoneWolf is obviously part of the inner Circle.LoneWolf is obviously part of the inner Circle.LoneWolf is obviously part of the inner Circle.LoneWolf is obviously part of the inner Circle.LoneWolf is obviously part of the inner Circle.LoneWolf is obviously part of the inner Circle.LoneWolf is obviously part of the inner Circle.LoneWolf is obviously part of the inner Circle.LoneWolf is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 05-21-2014, 09:22 PM   #349
TribalElder TribalElder is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LoneWolf View Post
I have a private bathroom connected to my office. When I am out of my office, I normally don't lock or even shut the door. I came back from lunch today and before I even sat down at my desk I could smell shit. I went over to the bathroom and someone had taken a shit and not flushed the toilet. If this happens again, I am going to set up my trail camera to find out who the mystery pooper is.
The victim of a shit and run
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TribalElder is obviously part of the inner Circle.TribalElder is obviously part of the inner Circle.TribalElder is obviously part of the inner Circle.TribalElder is obviously part of the inner Circle.TribalElder is obviously part of the inner Circle.TribalElder is obviously part of the inner Circle.TribalElder is obviously part of the inner Circle.TribalElder is obviously part of the inner Circle.TribalElder is obviously part of the inner Circle.TribalElder is obviously part of the inner Circle.TribalElder is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 05-22-2014, 01:19 PM   #350
Hammock Parties Hammock Parties is offline
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Healthy, non-explosive shit today.

I think we're done here.

It's been real.
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Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 05-22-2014, 01:21 PM   #351
Sweet Daddy Hate Sweet Daddy Hate is offline
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lol
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Sweet Daddy Hate is obviously part of the inner Circle.Sweet Daddy Hate is obviously part of the inner Circle.Sweet Daddy Hate is obviously part of the inner Circle.Sweet Daddy Hate is obviously part of the inner Circle.Sweet Daddy Hate is obviously part of the inner Circle.Sweet Daddy Hate is obviously part of the inner Circle.Sweet Daddy Hate is obviously part of the inner Circle.Sweet Daddy Hate is obviously part of the inner Circle.Sweet Daddy Hate is obviously part of the inner Circle.Sweet Daddy Hate is obviously part of the inner Circle.Sweet Daddy Hate is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 05-22-2014, 01:51 PM   #352
gblowfish gblowfish is offline
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Originally Posted by Count Zarth View Post
Healthy, non-explosive shit today.

I think we're done here.

It's been real.
I hope you wiped with one of Stephen J. Cannell's scripts.
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gblowfish is obviously part of the inner Circle.gblowfish is obviously part of the inner Circle.gblowfish is obviously part of the inner Circle.gblowfish is obviously part of the inner Circle.gblowfish is obviously part of the inner Circle.gblowfish is obviously part of the inner Circle.gblowfish is obviously part of the inner Circle.gblowfish is obviously part of the inner Circle.gblowfish is obviously part of the inner Circle.gblowfish is obviously part of the inner Circle.gblowfish is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 03-23-2017, 08:10 PM   #353
GloryDayz GloryDayz is offline
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I think I win this thread for the day. Just took a two-flusher (not counting the courtesy flush) and the belt went down a notch.
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GloryDayz is obviously part of the inner Circle.GloryDayz is obviously part of the inner Circle.GloryDayz is obviously part of the inner Circle.GloryDayz is obviously part of the inner Circle.GloryDayz is obviously part of the inner Circle.GloryDayz is obviously part of the inner Circle.GloryDayz is obviously part of the inner Circle.GloryDayz is obviously part of the inner Circle.GloryDayz is obviously part of the inner Circle.GloryDayz is obviously part of the inner Circle.GloryDayz is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 03-26-2017, 01:26 AM   #354
Pepe Silvia Pepe Silvia is offline
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I took a bear shit two days ago when you get the nice peak over the water.
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Pepe Silvia has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.Pepe Silvia has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.Pepe Silvia has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.Pepe Silvia has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.Pepe Silvia has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.Pepe Silvia has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.Pepe Silvia has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.Pepe Silvia has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.Pepe Silvia has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.Pepe Silvia has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.Pepe Silvia has parlayed a career as a truck driver into debt free trailer and jon boat ownership.
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Old 04-17-2017, 04:34 PM   #355
Hammock Parties Hammock Parties is offline
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Damn I was just telling someone to grab a bottle of magnesium citrate the other day, cleaned them right out.

Magic stuff.
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Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 10-27-2017, 03:10 PM   #356
appegeaceta appegeaceta is offline
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Im on a mission to shit
Its no big deal fellas. When im in that yellow truck, I feel like one of the Wu-Generals rollin through the hood bumpin my new fat shit that wont even go Gold.
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appegeaceta is a favorite in the douche of the year contest.
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Old 12-23-2020, 08:54 PM   #357
alanm alanm is offline
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Originally Posted by Hammock Parties View Post
Damn I was just telling someone to grab a bottle of magnesium citrate the other day, cleaned them right out.

Magic stuff.
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alanm is obviously part of the inner Circle.alanm is obviously part of the inner Circle.alanm is obviously part of the inner Circle.alanm is obviously part of the inner Circle.alanm is obviously part of the inner Circle.alanm is obviously part of the inner Circle.alanm is obviously part of the inner Circle.alanm is obviously part of the inner Circle.alanm is obviously part of the inner Circle.alanm is obviously part of the inner Circle.alanm is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 12-29-2021, 05:42 PM   #358
Hammock Parties Hammock Parties is offline
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Eating far too well in NYC has clogged my colon and I have not properly shit in three days now.

I went to five different CVS/Walgreens trying to find a bottle of the magic magnesium elixir and they are ALWAYS sold out.

Finally found them at Target.

IT'S TIME TO EPIC SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
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Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.Hammock Parties is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 01-01-2022, 08:16 AM   #359
scho63 scho63 is online now
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Hammock Parties View Post
Eating far too well in NYC has clogged my colon and I have not properly shit in three days now.

I went to five different CVS/Walgreens trying to find a bottle of the magic magnesium elixir and they are ALWAYS sold out.

Finally found them at Target.

IT'S TIME TO EPIC SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
What will your lady friend think once she witnesses what is about to happen?
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scho63 is obviously part of the inner Circle.scho63 is obviously part of the inner Circle.scho63 is obviously part of the inner Circle.scho63 is obviously part of the inner Circle.scho63 is obviously part of the inner Circle.scho63 is obviously part of the inner Circle.scho63 is obviously part of the inner Circle.scho63 is obviously part of the inner Circle.scho63 is obviously part of the inner Circle.scho63 is obviously part of the inner Circle.scho63 is obviously part of the inner Circle.
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Old 01-08-2022, 12:32 AM   #360
El Lobo Gordo El Lobo Gordo is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Hammock Parties View Post
Eating far too well in NYC has clogged my colon and I have not properly shit in three days now.

I went to five different CVS/Walgreens trying to find a bottle of the magic magnesium elixir and they are ALWAYS sold out.

Finally found them at Target.

IT'S TIME TO EPIC SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
Just carry these in your toiletry travel bag.
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El Lobo Gordo Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.El Lobo Gordo Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.El Lobo Gordo Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.El Lobo Gordo Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.El Lobo Gordo Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.El Lobo Gordo Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.El Lobo Gordo Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.El Lobo Gordo Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.El Lobo Gordo Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.El Lobo Gordo Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.El Lobo Gordo Forgot to Remove His Claytex and Got Toxic Shock Syndrome.
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