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Sorry to hear it bud. This is certainly a tough deal. The whole ex-boyfriend thing certainly means there's likely some sort of emotional attachment deep down for her and that makes it a bit tougher.
In relationships, there always seems to be that "7 year itch" as they call it. I'm married, we've been together over 10 years. We both went through it. Things settle in, people get complacent, and life is rather boring. It happens. Don't blame yourself though, she made her decision.
I'd want to know more. How was it that she was in contact with him after all this time to begin with? Was it a one night thing? Was it an affair? Does it matter? Most of all, could you forgive her depending on that answer? And with that, would you ever be able to trust her again if you did?
I think taking time apart to find answers is important. You have a child together and that child's long-term welfare will depend on both of you. Figure out how the both of you will move forward from this.
First instinct is to beat the guy within an inch of his life and risk spending 30+ days in the slammer, but that doesn't help your kid. Be strong. You've had your drink.
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