Quote:
Originally Posted by Superturtle
Why are folks pining for Ford?
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Veach: 'Ello, I wish to register a complaint.
Schneider: We're closing for the regular season.
Veach: Never mind that, my lad. I wish to complain about this Seahawk what I purchased not half a year ago from this very franchise.
Schneider: Oh yes, the Frank Clark... What's wrong with it?
Veach: I'll tell you what's wrong with it, my lad. 'E's dead, that's what's wrong with it!
Schneider: No, no, 'e's uh,...he's getting chipped at the line.
Veach: Look, matey, I know a dead Seahawk when I see one, and I'm looking at one right now.
Schneider: No no he's not dead! He's getting chipped at the line of scrimmage! Remarkable DE, the Frank Clark, idn'it, ay? Beautiful locker room presence!
Veach: The locker room presence don't enter into it. It's stone dead.
Scheinder: Nononono, no, no! 'E's getting chipped at the line!
Veach: All right then, if he's getting chipped at the line, I'll run some wide 9 blitzes to wake him up! 'Ello, Mister Pass Rusher! I've got a lovely fresh QB for you if you beat the TE...
Schneider: There, he got a sack!
Veach: No, he didn't, that was Derek Carr running right into him!
Schneider: Never!!
Veach: Yes it was!
Veach: (yelling) 'ELLO FRANK!!!!! Testing! Testing! Testing! Testing! It's 3rd down an long! Time to make a play!!
*nothing happens*
Veach: Now that's what I call a dead pass rusher.
Schneider: No, no.....No, 'e's double-teamed!
Mr. Praline: Double-teamed?!?
Schneider: Yeah! He got double-teamed, just as you were dialing up pressure! Frank Clark attracts the attention of all blockers. Very dangerous looking pass rusher!
Veach: Um...now look...now look, mate, I've definitely 'ad enough of this. That pass rusher is definitely deceased, and when I purchased it not 'alf a year ago, you assured me that its total lack of an elite production season was due to it being tired after chasing around Russell Wilson in practice.
Schneider: Well, you're probably pining for Ford.
Veach: PININ' for FORD?!?!?!? What kind of talk is that? Look, why did he fall down the moment he engaged a shitty Jacksonville OT?
Schneider: Frank Clark prefers keepin' on the ground! Remarkable player, id'nit, squire? Lovely spin move! Beautiful run defense!
Veach: Look matey! 'E's passed on! This pass rusher is no more! He has ceased to be good! 'E's got his money and gone to **** it away! 'E's a broke dick! Bereft of life, 'e rests in peace! If I hadn't arbitrarily put in him the starting lineup 'e'd be backing up for the Miami Dolphins! 'Is QB pressures are now 'istory! 'E's kicked the bucket, 'e's shuffled off 'is NFL clout, run down the northern border and joined the bleedin' CFL!! THIS IS AN EX-PLAYER!!