[Otter]

I’ve got a couple...

Was kayaking with 3 others back in PA on some class IV waters and managed to get ahead of the group. They stopped for one reason another before an upcoming rough patch and I couldn’t hear them yelling for me to wait up.

Went into the rapids on my own and did fine but then encountered about a 10’ drop which I didn’t see approaching. Went in upside down and couldn’t roll over due to the whirlpool effect and the kayak was spinning so fast I couldn’t land the paddle on anything solid to get a push.

I went to bail out but it turns out last time we stopped to hydrate and quick eat I tucked my grab hook under the skirt. We usually check that for each other but this time it went unoticed.

Fade to black…

Woke up to Dave giving me CPR. He’s an ex-82nd Airborne Army medic. Apparently my lips were blue, face was grey and was clinically dead when he found me. I can’t vouch for that however.

After finishing coughing up the water and calming down we kayaked out and I went to bed early.

Went up to Alaska with Bwana a couple years ago to do some halibut fishing. After three full days of being stuck together 24-7 I figured I’ll go on my own for the day and and I’ll give Bwana, his brother, and cousin Tony a day without having to put up with my ugly mug and have some family time.

I rented a Jeep and jumped on Route 1 North to destination unknown. I wound up stopping at couple streams and rivers to break out the fly rod with very little luck. The last one I went to was (ironically) named “Moose Creek”.

Oh, a side note: Alaska has the worst mosquitoes I’ve ever experienced hands down. They are absolutely rabid and come in swarms of 10s of thousands at time.

While swinging the fly rod and getting eaten alive by mosquitoes about 50 yards away from the Jeep I hear a grunt behind me. Turns out it was a full grown moose cow less than 10 yards away and this is the time of year when they’re nursing their young.

Bwana gave me his .454 to carry but I left it in the truck because I didn’t want to get it wet. I just raised my arms for some unknown reason like it was a cop telling me to back up and slowly backed up without turning my back to it in waist high water on me that went up to that monsters knees at best. The whole time it starred at me like ‘GTF off my river’. How or why that moose didn’t curb stomp me only God knows.

The worst I’ve ever witnessed was my good friend Jeff go off a really, really high jump in the Moab Desert and land very, very badly. It turns out that the landing broke about just every bone in his body except his left arm which was oddly enough perfectly fine despite every other appendage being broken in several places.

Trying to pick him up and get him laid down in the back of the pickup was easily the most horrific experience I’ve ever had in my life. Imagine picking up a 200lb screaming in agony Hefty bag filled with motor oil and rocks with arms and legs 4+ feet in the air, then dragging it onto the bed, and THEN driving it out on roads to where an ambulance can reach you on roads that require 4 wheel drive. Bleh!

There's quiet a few more but that's my top 3!