I’m leaving forever.
 

Seriously, I am.


I know what you’re thinking. Maybe I got annoyed by something someone said. Maybe after two Super Bowls in a row I’m satiated on the Chiefs. Maybe I’m going to prison, or joining Dick Cheney on a barnstorming tour, or maybe the antifreeze actually wasn’t a good idea and I died.

The fun of a farewell forever thread is not in knowing the reason. It’s in not knowing, and the mystery behind the disappearance. MrBlond is legendary not because he was here or because he left, but rather because of how he departed. He was DB Cooper jumping out of the Chiefsplanet plane and disappearing into the night, and with that act he became immortal.

It is now my time to parachute from the plane, and I can assure you that I will not return. It would be enjoyable to become an unsolved Chiefsplanet mystery in the process, but I can’t do that to you. It’s cruel enough that you will no longer get to read my thoughtful prose and learn from my wisdom. I can’t allow you to speculate forever about what became of me, and to always wonder if that guy with the fake glasses and mustache sitting next to you at the game is me.

So I’ve instructed one Chiefsplanet member to reveal the mystery. If this thread ever reaches 1,000 posts, that person will share the reason. But until then, you will have only my boarding pass, a flight attendant’s vague description, and 110,871 posts to remember me by.

Farewell, Chiefsplanet!

(Sound of wind rushing past an open passenger cabin door.)

https://i.ytimg.com/vi/k6vVWIVDGqk/maxresdefault.jpg

Well....bye!
https://thumbs.gfycat.com/HatefulNim...restricted.gif

Mods, please close this thread.

Who here gives a ****?

Tapout acknowledged. Later Patteau. You were always cool. RIP.

I don’t even know who you are.

It may have been more fitting to post this in DC. Been a while since I last saw you active in these parts.

See ya, Pat. Thanks for the debates in the early Obama years. Hope you and yours are doing well.

Burst. We has it.

I would never have admitted this if not for this thread but Patteeu has been one of my favorite posters on this site. We had many run ins early on and I have grown to appreciate and respect his opinions.

If this is real, I will miss you sir. You have a unique and refreshing perspective. For whatever reason, your posting style or ability to express yourself always makes sense to me even if I disagree with it.

We need more Pateeu not less around here.

I sincerely hope all is well with you.

If the reason you are leaving is because this place sucks, yeah, we already know that.

I'm not sure that pat knows what the word "immortal" means.
It also seems like the kind of thing he'd be willing to argue about for weeks on end.
Probably only rivalled by Donger in his capacity to bicker about semantics and meaningless minutiae for as long as you could take it.

You were sort of funny sometimes and mostly better than most with your leanings.
RIP

See ya Patty.

oh

I can't help but wonder if this is related to pat's recent embrace of Judaism (as seen in his avatar) and he's decided to disregard trivial things in favor of devoted study of the Talmud.

All the best.

I don't spend much time in DC, but our interactions have always been favorable.

983 posts to go.

i bet this thread will reach 1000 posts in 2027. if that happens I will reveal the secret as to why i left in 2024.

j/k patt

I never liked your political takes but you've always stuck to your guns and your guy, Dick. I can respect that at least.

OP translated: Dane pissed me off by mother****ing me in a designated non-political thread.

Similar impact to if cosmo or the other DC loons did this....absolutely none

Enjoy Brother , was a hoot!!!

Welp, the IQ average just dropped here. Thanks a lot good buddy.

You are a mult, for Christ's sake.

Does this have something to do with NFTs?

LMAO

Peace out Pat always enjoyed our banter hope life treats you well

"There is some truth in all reports." "All truly great things start with a struggle." "No matter what, don't quit, even if it's a bad idea. See it through and learn something." "Son, no matter what you do, please don't buy a Volvo." These are some of the things my father said to me and your father should have said to you.

If so. I blame PB for Patty's departure.

Seriously though... The non CPers living in KC would do well to see and read the trash that comes out of their neighbors' bud lite holes.

Shut up pillowbiter

Damn. I’m gonna miss you, buddy. Hope all is well with you and yours.

Take care.

Hate to see ya go patteeu.

Blow me. Why don’t you depart. Everyone hates you.


As for Patty, I think he’s had health issues in the past so I’d imagine that’s why.

One DC turd flushed forever. Hundreds to go.

When I stop posting at CP for over a year, I want my posts to be retroactively edited to “A hotdog is a sandwich.”

Stay healthy.

It’s been a while since he has been active in DC as well. I was on the verge of being concerned.

So long, patteeu. Good poster, will be missed. Best of luck and enjoy your ChiefsPlanet retirement.

Later Pat

That’s interesting, because I was just recently thinking about making a post in DC if anyone had done a wellness check on Pat. Hmm

At any rate, farewell, Friend! You were fun to converse with over the years.

Cheers!

I was thinking along the same lines, just hadn’t pulled the trigger on it yet. I hope it’s nothing serious but, same as PB I recall he had health issues he talked about once. And if I recall correctly it was terminal and he had already WAY out lived his death sentence. If I recall correctly...

Raped to death by BEP... man, poor patteeu...

RIP

God Speed Sir...

Yes, you are correct.

God speed, patteau. Enjoy your life.

patteau you were always one of the good ones around here...you'll be missed.

Can you take the lowlifes staylor & The Franchise with you?

How many scantily clad pictures of women will I need to post to get this thread to 1000?!

Sad to see you go, patteeu. I always respected your views and appreciated your integrity. I hope you can and will return.

I had no idea he had health issues. One of the calmest and most even tempered posters gone, sad. Always enjoyed his posts and interaction.

Just say “Alex Smith” and the Bat Signal will go up

Have a good one, patty!

I doubt it gets to 500 posts

we signed this piece of shit yet?

Pat never reduced himself to insulting others. That shows a lot of character.

Have a good life buddy.

And another one bites the dust

How in the hell has this not been posted yet?

https://i.imgur.com/nL75kTc.jpg

Or he's just a ****ing pussy!

Wait.......

Love ya, buddy. I'd say hit me up on facebook but I'm always getting banned...

Errybuddy on my friends list keep leaving...

https://media.tenor.com/images/3ae02...a868/tenor.gif

Hasta

Liar

Is this just an attempt at getting a 1000-post thread?

The fun part is not caring.

I always enjoyed Pats takes. Good poster and seemed like a good dude. I didn't know anything about his health. Godspeed Patteau!

I don't post near as much as I used to but for some reason I can't quit this place. I continue to look. It like looking at the carnage of a train wreck. You just can't look away.

Never really interacted with ya, but happy trails just the same

This makes me sad to read. I tried to do some searching of the archives, but I'm pretty sure that patteeu, Taco John, memyselfi, BIG DADDY and a handful of others were responsible for the existence of DC. It was quite a debate and took quite a long time to get community buy-in to push the political talk to a sub-forum. But it was the right thing to do. Everything improved, even the political debates. :)

I quietly bailed on DC in 2010 or so, because I saw the shifting nature of the GOP into what it became publicly under Trump. I hope patteeu is happy and healthy in his next steps in life. And someone tell him I'm grateful for Dick Cheney raising a strong and honorable daughter. LMAO

Why do people need to leave this place forever? If you need a break, just take a break for awhile. Or just continue to lurk.

Whatever the case, Patteeu, I hope you find peace in your life and wish you the best.

Yeah, I don't get the whole announcement thing either. Just go do whatever it is that you do. If you feel like posting again, then post again. There's no reason why anyone has to officially quit. It mostly seems to be attention-whoring.

I was one of the most vocal proponents of creating DC. Pat was vehemently opposed to it. We bickered and argued for years after that, but eventually buried the hatchet.

Happy trails, Pat. Hope your health issues aren't as bad as some have speculated.

Well since you’re gone and not James Bond, I guess your confidant can release the reason any time.

Who is Donger going to argue with incessantly? Please stay Pat for that idiot Donger's sake.

Pete

True, they go back and forth all the time. I think they are lonely people and need someone in their miserable lives to talk to.

Kind of sad actually.

damn i missed being post 69 **** this thread.

That's a shame. Happy trails, patteeu. I'll miss the interaction.

1000 posts eh?

Should we make this happen??

Get to 999 and close the thread.

Really? That dude will argue with anybody!

LMAO

Will not.

Will to! (Think we can keep this up until the thread reaches 999 posts?)

Meh, giving yourself too much credit. Nobody gives a shit why someone leaves CP forever. I mean, it's a message board, and having not met you in person, my guess is 95 percent of us could give two shits why you are leaving. With that said.......Well, Bye