***** Official NEW Dating Mega Thread, Part 2 *****
Let's do this.
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Got another one lined up. We're not going to dinner.
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Well shit
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I recently saw a girl I used to have a thing for when we were teenagers. It was from way back when I lived in another state so we've barely talked and haven't seen each other in about 5 years or so. She's got a boyfriend who she has a child with and they live together.
I had been up there for a few days and we saw each other a couple times. Nothing happened. About a month after I came back home she called me randomly one day and told me she had just found out that her boyfriend had been cheating for months, at least. She went on to basically say that it was really hard for her not to "do anything" with me while I was up there and that she wouldn't have stopped herself had she known prior to me leaving. It's important to note that this conversation took place about a month ago. ................... She's now engaged to be married to the guy. |
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So being a married old guy, sometimes I test my attractiveness to the opposite sex. I was looking for a birthday card and a decent looking mom was hovering, trying to get to the same selection I was looking at. It was awkward, I found my card, a glittery one, got that crap all over me. I looked at her and simply said "I could do without the glitter" and good lord, she busted out with laugh heard half way across the store, like I told her the funniest thing ever. Kinda freaked me out, I went on my way.
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Buzz has a stable...no doubt
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She missed out on Tha Virus Jackhammer
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I Still chat with 3 chics on FB from that trip and ended up meeting up with one not long after in Vegas. This trip happened 6 mo after a 7 year relationship so I was due for some fun. Just the other day my coworker mentioned his wife was going on a cruise with her girlfriends and he wasn't "interested in going on that shit trip". Which makes me think more women go on cruises than men. Anyone else agree? |
You still poking that chubby chick billay?
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Hop in on that three way, Clay. It's not when there's some honey in the middle.
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So, I'm now in a committed relationship with the chick I was talking about last month.
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So I have this problem of busting waaaay too soon. I used to not care, get in/get out, who gives a **** if she likes it, but now I wanna impress. I do well, but not for long.
Any ideas on how to fix this? Without pills? |
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Best thing I can come up with thus far is pull out and lick the pussy for ten or fifteen minutes, then go back in.
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If you're doing it right then 15 minutes should be your target time for everything (she cums a couple of times, you cum once). <iframe width="560" height="315" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/-gZ2Rqu-ygM" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe> |
***** Official NEW Dating Mega Thread, Part 2 *****
Wear a condom.
Employ the start and stop method (pulling out and eating the putty tat is your best bet here). Beat your meat beforehand. Change positions frequently. Slow it down and grind pelvises if you feel you're about to bust until the feeling resides. Girls seem to like that better than the jackhammer anyway. |
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Quit ruining my jokes. |
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It's also useful if you've been drinking. :) |
Ah, yes. Alcohol works as well. Hit her with that Henny dick and she'll be begging you to finish.
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Please tell me you're using condoms.. |
Guys, there's this girl at my work. Affluent family, crazy high credit score, not what I would take home to mom, but I've watched guys ask her if they can lick every inch of her super long legs.
She literally just made a prison pen pal 2 weeks ago and is now putting all sorts of money on his books. ... There is no excuse for any of you. |
Welp, after reading that, I've given up. Thanks kati.
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Now if you'll excuse me I'm organizing my Star Wars Customizable Card Game collection. |
Weed works for me almost as well as beer. Mix the two and I likely won't finish before I give up.
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I've never had sex high but I've heard it's a transcendent experience.
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I have a friend that has an awesome story about having sex while on a mushroom trip. I don't remember it well enough to re-tell it, but that shit is hilarious. BTW, he doesn't recommend it. Said he couldn't focus on what he was doing because of all the distorted sensory perception. |
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Weed helps prolong it but you're both lazy. Coke makes you do just dirty awful things to each other. X makes you not really care who you're doing it to. |
****ing on mushrooms would look like a Vaudville skit.
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Viagra is cool if you don't mind sitting on a fence pole.
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The girl wasn't tripping. He says she said it was awesome because he lasted forever and he just kept pounding away as he was getting intense visual hallucinations. |
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You ever pop a Viagra Joey?
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Count needs him a cute, socially awkward chick to impale with his chemically enhanced dong.
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http://static1.wikia.nocookie.net/__...d_SinCity.jpeg |
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Those prison pen pal chicks are nuts, if you are ever considering one, RUN! DO NOT LOOK BACK!!!
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Unless you are in prison, in that case do what you gotta do to keep her around, never thought about that side of things.
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I'm sure you all will tell me I'm overreacting again but the chick told me last week she was goin to a movie with a hmguy. I thought ok just a friend no big deal.
We're laying in bed tonight she's looking at FB and goes "that can't be his gf!" I ask if that's the guy she was supposed to see the movie with she said yes I asked how she knew him she said online. She said they dated for a few months. |
and yet you were IN BED with her
stop being insecure and lay pipe |
Yup the dude is probably railing her on the side.
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Prison dating is interesting. |
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I actually got tested last year and came back clean, but it was only a urine test. Only two sexual partners since then, but I went to a more complete testing facility this time and got the full run of tests. |
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Anyway, never had any symptoms but due diligence. |
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They can test for things like gonorrhea and chlamydia through urine. They need your blood to test for herp, syphilis, and HIV though.
I'm not sure how they test for hep C... Probably blood as well. |
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I've been snipped for quit a while and I STILL have to strap one on? That's some bullshit. |
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AFAIK, eating the cat has the same taste as drinking out of a garden hose #metallic
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Not really dating - I've been working on myself as much as I can and tending to my company.
Nothing else really going on - nothing in my microcosm - and that's ok for now. I'm not trying real hard either. So. All is well. Whenever and However it happens, one day - I'll be ready - and if it never does - that's fine too. |
You ever incorporate Zaxbys with sex SR?
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Reminds me: I was talking to a coworker about pussy for some reason. He's currently in a long-term relationship. He says something to the effect of "vaginas smell like fish- they all do" and I just gave him this bewildered look. That hasn't been my experience at all. Of all the women I've had sex with, only one had a bad smell. |
Yup if it tastes like chicken keep on lickin
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Cue kati and buttered popcorn. |
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You installed Windows 10 with that chick yet KurtCobain?
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I'm pretty much done with her for now though.
Thinking about trying out the online thing again. |
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and done with that
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