*kicks u in teh nuts*

*Looks at steel codpiece and laughs*

*cops a feel*

I have nothing. Game over. U win. ROFL

(Not fair though, I'm drunk :D)

I'll pass. I want you to experience my full sexual might. The experience should not be dulled by alcohol.

Offenhauser intake with an Edlebrock 1406...

breathe..breathe in the air...

"Full sexual might"? So in other words, an hour of u flopping on my belly trying to find the hole, followed by a partial limp penetration, 10 seconds later... Whoopa!

I'll drink to that. Cheers! ;)

Oh my...LMAO

I'm sitting in the Palms Hotel, waiting for my wife, who's at a Duran Duran concert.

All I can say is that I've never seen a more disgusting display of empty, vapid, phony, soul-less people in my entire life.
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Thx Dane! :D

****ing Duran Duran? Seriously? ROFL

LMAO Holy Christ. :( :deevee:

Farm Report

From its humble beginnings as a straightforward hog futures report, Farm Report evolved into a film review show where a couple of farmers enthuse about films where people are blown up. Recognizing that movies are hardly integral to seeing things get blown up, Farm Report finally became the show it was always meant to be: Big Jim and Billy Sol talk briefly with celebrity guests, and then blow them up.

1 Farm Report [1 - 12 (2)]

Host Big Jim McBob runs down the agriculture prices and talks with a man from the Agriculture Department about a problem involving salesmen and farmers' daughters.

Host Big Jim McBob - Flaherty; Mr Dwight Hayes from the Agriculture Department - Thomas

2 Farm Film Report: The Red Hat [2 - 7 (2)]
Big Jim's guest critic Billy Sol Hurok reviews The Red Hat. He gives it a good review, cause they blow up the king at the end. And then they blow up.

Big Jim McBob - Flaherty; Billy Sol Hurok - Candy; Announcer - staff announcer

3 SCTV Rock Concert with Big Jim and Billy Sol [2 - 17 (10)]

Big Jim and Billy Sol host Rock Concert, blowing up Freddy Fender, Randy Newman, Patti Smith, Helen Reddy and the Village People.

Big Jim McBob - Flaherty; Billy Sol Hurok - Candy; Freddy Fender - Levy; Randy Newman - Thomas; Patti Smith - Martin; Helen Reddy - O'Hara; The Village People - Flaherty, Candy, Thomas, Levy

4 Farm Film Report: Meryl Streep [4/2 - 3 (7)]

Meryl weeps and then blows up.

Big Jim McBob - Flaherty; Billy Sol Hurok - Candy; Meryl Streep - O'Hara

5 Farm Film Report: Brooke Shields and The Boomtown Rats [4/2 - 8 (3)]

Brooke tells a preserve joke, sings a song, and blows up. Big Jim and Billy Sol introduce the celebrity band, The Boomtown Rats, who perform "Never in a Million Years". Jim and Billy decide to blow them up, too.

Billy Sol Hurok - Candy; Big Jim McBob - Flaherty; Brooke Shields - O'Hara; The Boomtown Rats - The Boomtown Rats

6 Farm Film Celebrity Blow-Up: Danny Terrio [5/4 - 4 (5)]

Danny Terrio of Dance Fever moves and wiggles and does all those mobile things, and then blows up.

Big Jim McBob - Flaherty; Billy Sol Hurok - Candy; Danny Terrio - Short; High Fashion Girls - extras

7 Farm Film Celebrity Blow-Up: Dustin Hoffman as Tootsie [5/5 - 1 (6)]

Dustin Hoffman, as Tootsie, gets sensitive about being a woman, prepares, and then blows up.

Big Jim McBob - Flaherty; Billy Sol Hurok - Candy; Dustin Hoffman - Short

8 Farm Film Celebrity Blow-Up: Bernadette Peters [5/5 - 3 (4)]

Bernadette pouts, sings, bawls and blows up.

Big Jim McBob - Flaherty; Billy Sol Hurok - Candy; Bernadette Peters - Martin

9 Farm Film Celebrity Blow-Up: Neil Sedaka [5/5 - 6 (3)]

Neil Sedaka sings real high and blows up.

Big Jim McBob - Flaherty; Billy Sol Hurok - Candy; Neil Sedaka - Levy

Billy Sol had a bit part in Jaws 23; as Joe was playing the old salt, Catherine O'Hara takes Big Jim McBob's place as the other farmer.

Jaws 23 Part 1 [2 - 10 (4)]

Amity has a problem: a lack of sharks. So they turn to mackeral.

Mayor - Thomas; Sheriff - Levy; Billy Sol Hurok - Candy; Other Hick - O'Hara; Disappointed Woman - Martin; Old Salt - Flaherty; Announcer - staff announcer; Townspeople - extras
Big Jim and Billy Sol also appeared on The Amazing Kretin.

The Amazing Kretin [2 - 16 (1)]

The Amazing Kretin amazes with feats of mental agility. But Big Jim and Billy Sol figure he can't blow up.

Kretin - Thomas; Young Lady - Martin; Big Jim McBob - Flaherty; Billy Sol Hurok - Candy; studio audience - extras; Announcer - staff announcer

No woman has ever made me Whoopa!

ROFL
remind me later to rep you for this.
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Not surprising...
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You've been with one. Don't judge us all based on one experience.

I just met O.J. Mayo.

Scumbag.
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Come on Luv... u know his blow-up doll doesn't count.

My wife just said the level of douche-baggery (her exact words) at the N9NE Steakhouse at the Palms is 1,000 times greater than any place in L.A.

The food is awesome so far.

:)
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is this like the chiefsplanet version of twitter

It's brilliant. I hope Flopnuts is on here tomorrow night for Game 3 of a meaningless regular-season series between the Texas Rangers and Seattle Mariners cus LORD KNOWS I WILL BE!

I need a .22 to eradicate some rabbits. MOTHER ****ERS! :bang:

There are some UFC fighters in the house.

Don't watch UFC so I don't know who they are.

LOTS of hoochie-mamas.
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Damn, you still in Vegas? where you at, pimp?

The N9NE at the Palms
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How many chicks grinding have you seen tonight, Dane?

Ahahahahaha holy shit, BJ Novak was on Punk'd?!

That name had to have been initially inspired by Tech N9ne.

wait....that's a steakhouse, no? not even a club.

"Oh man... crizayzah shiznit right here!!...this one ho just ordered an AT THE
TABLE Caesar SALAD yo!!!!

um, I was ambivalent about him before but apparently Andrew WK ****ing rules

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p.s. hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

Riding mower works well, and you get the added bonus of fertilizer :evil:

Back to the Future should have been a TV show.

THERE ARE NO FEEDS!
THERE IS NO FIGHT CLUB!
I HAVE NO CAT'S FEET!
I HAVE NO SEAL TAIL!
I HAVE NO MULE EARS!

IN THE FIFTH, YOUR ASS GOES DOWN!

Learn it, live it, or GET FULL BLOWN AIDS!

Does anyone know if Hayden Panettiere gets naked in "I Love You, Beth Cooper"? If so, I'll go see it...

Arod has homered twice-and is now in the top ten all time.

What a stud.

:whackit::whackit:

Did you click the bar and view the full image? Holy Camel Toe Batman!

I HATE obnoxious guests who fake an accident/injury to try and get free stuff.
Took all the restraint I had to not bunch this ****er in the face!!!:cuss:

**** China Bear.

I have three words for that pic:

Nom.

Nom.

Nom.

Fixed. :)

I'm heading to the gym cus there's not a single ****ing girl in this whole wide world who gives a rat shit about me.

YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

And people, this man knows vapi- never mind. ;)

I just got my SWOLL on.

Now it's time for baseball. Where is that bitch Flopnuts?

Director's Cut of "Alien" is on Ion. Sigourney Weaver was pretty damn f**kable back then... In that skinny 70s-chick sorta way...

Her titties are weird. Too bony. I like her hair, though.

I'm not a tit-man. Small's fine with me, as long as there's a nipple involved. Like M&Ms, they melt in your mouth, not in your hand. :evil:

Is it still baseball time, bitch?

Jared ****ing Washburn.

OOOOHHHHH Mark Lowe.

Eat a dick.

I'm talking to gay men.

So you're on a Rangers board. A rump rangers board.

Blaylock with the sand wedge.

You didn't know who Aardsma was before tonight did you?

My avatar is about the least classy avatar in Chiefsplanet history. Don't you think?

I just know it is making the Christian conservatives squirm.

I'm looking forward to the Watchtower question of the week.


Why not a pierced tongue?

LOL @ the tags on this thread.

Since when are there tags?

There's not, but any thread that had them, keeps them. If you bump the thread, you can read the tags.

Mod Hates Tags.
:(
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At least 10% of the population will always be left-handed. Always. Why? Hand-to-hand combat favors the southpaw.

It feels good to feel good.

Going to see U2 in < 3 months. PBJ

Overslept this morning & didn't go in to work.:grr:

But no big deal, took a personal day:D

Washington DC forum is full of wack jobs of all stripes. Art Bell would shake his head in disbelief.

I can't decide whether I want to **** Meg Giry or Christine Daae harder.

if she has really long legs or a freakishly long neck it is ok to call it giraffe toe instead of camel toe.

I can be as cruel as you, fighting fire with firewood.

Hey Flopnuts, suck my big old balls.

:rolleyes: wow another great post.

Better than yours.

I guess you are having one of your "angry" nights. I will leave you be. :)

I'm not angry. But you are clueless.

http://mamrie.files.wordpress.com/20...idthegnome.jpg

Great cartoon or greatest cartoon ever?

Monday morning's are wonderful. You scramble to get your mind back back on track, so you can lose it again about wednesday afternoon.

GREAT INVENTION! From my Daily Website Calendar: the SnuzNLuz! "Trouble getting up in the morning? Here's a product that will definitely get you bounding out of bed. For every minute you sleep past the alarm on this clock, your bank account automatically donates money to an organization you hate." ROFL!

http://www.thinkgeek.com/stuff/41/snuznluz.shtml

Yippee. Sunday Ticket is up to $270 now.

That's insane. Is it really worth that kind of dough just to be in the comfort of your own home? Hell, you could go to the sports bar for all 16 weeks and spend $17 each time and that's $272. Unless you have a buddy who'll split the Sunday Ticket cost with you, then it's worth it...

I can't decide what to eat for dinner tonight.