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LMAO
We're just ****ing with you, Billay. Take the stick out of your ass. |
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Bet ya billay either didn't tell his buds about her or never let them meet her.
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Dating a fat chick is like riding a moped, it's all fun until your buddies see you on one.
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I've never received a mind-blowing blowjob, even from a fatty. The blowies I've received have done the job in getting me hard and generally feel good (obvi, my dick is in a chick's mouth), but I can't even come from them unless I make an effort.
What am I missing out on? |
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ROFLROFL
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Back when I was 18 I had this little Puerto Rican piece that LOVED to give head, although she wouldn't swallow. I swear that girl would suck my dick for a half hour with no breaks. I'll never forget one time we were just laying down watching TV and out of nowhere she's like "go shut the door and take your pants off". I was like daaaaamn, homie! Shit's. About. To. Go. Down.
She loved to give head and I loved that but the fact that she could slob on my knob for 30 minutes is probably a good indicator that it wasn't the best head. |
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Nope, no ball play. You know those Hispanics don't like hand sports.
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I bet most are too scared to even branch out to the sack in fear of hurting us. |
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Hah.
Idk. I've had my balls sucked once. I can't say I see what all the fuss is about. |
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Jesus. Women can be so flaky. I very nearly got stood up tonight.
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If she was about to stand you up why continue with the date? Not judging either way, but you're all about your "**** yes or no" mantra lately. |
Clay ain't got no type bad bitches is the only thing he likes
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I was just gonna trust her and go out and meet at the place but...um...not now. |
Why did Big Smoke get banned?
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Oh crap, she just texted. LMAO
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I've been laying low for a bit. Dating has kinda worn me out.
I have a few women I'm talking to and I've been being so straight forward about how our time together is going to play out that they just say sure lets have fun and thanks for being honest. |
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Holy ****, some of you guys are missing the **** out.
You have got to learn how to talk to your woman about sex and what you want to do. Get her to watch some porn and learn. Women are just as big of freaks as guys are. You just have to know how to bring it up with each chick. Everyone loves to bust a nut. If you ask her how to make her cum and you get the job done, then she will do almost anything you ask after that (there are exceptions). |
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KC Native dropping knowledge
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oh god, she was fat. i had a drink and left. thank god she didn't order anything. 10 mins and i up out that bitch.
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I'm pissed off that I'm $6.65 poorer tonight. |
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How fat?
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For as much as your life sucked not too long ago, it amazes me how little empathy you have. It's spectrum-ish.
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I was perfectly nice. I conversed with her for 10 minutes, told her I wasn't interested, and left. |
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I've known women who weren't interested in me and they led me on and let me pay for everything.
I would have been ecstatic if those women had peaced out after 10 minutes. |
I did misunderstand the 2-minutes of waiting on the check to be the entirety of the date. I'd say 8 minutes makes a difference. My bad.
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Yeah that would have been really mean. I sat there for 8 minutes drinking my beer and figuring out how the **** I was going to get out of there, sub-consciously begging the bartender to get the **** over here so I could ask for the check. |
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I have no problem talking to girls about sex. I actually love talking about sex. I could talk about sex all day, every day. The issue is that about 99% of my sexual encounters have been one-nighters or very brief. I was a dog when I was younger. But my ex, who I was with for 3+ years, had never watched a lick of porn. To this day she maintains that she's never seen any porn in her lifetime. Her head game isn't bad but she's just not as interested as she could be to perfecting her craft. Head to her is just something she has to do occasionally before sex to get warmed up. Sometimes a guy just wants his dick sucked while he's watching TV, ya feel me?!? |
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Women want to be romanced and generally aren't visual creatures like us guys. Thus porno is something that should be introduced long after you've undone her combo. I suggest some guys are better off talking about that after a few dates at least lol. |
***** Official NEW Dating Mega Thread, Part 2 *****
*on first date*
"I took the liberty of printing out some screenshots from my favorite porno. Here *draws huge John Madden circle* is some of the stuff I'm going to be expecting from you tonight. Don't forget to work the balls." |
New fantasy team: Clay ditched Billy's whale
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ROFL Online dating has ruined you guys
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I have no idea when that pic was taken but it wasn't this month. She walked in and I was like "surely that isn't her...." and then when she stared deeply into my eyes as if to say "hi stud" I realized I had stepped in dating dogshit. |
"That guy was a jerk" *Then texts date number 4 for the week.*
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The epitome of a guy with average looks, a healthy psyche and sound intellect and a great personality is the equivalent of a well prepared chicken. There's absolutely nothing wrong with this cut of meat, but the person in the buffet line is going to pass up on the chicken because there could be a chance there's a damned good steak just a little bit down the line. |
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Just settle already, you don't want to be single forever! One of my first online dates last year, I had planned to meet up with a chic at a restaurant. As I walked in restaurant she was texting me that she was there. I look up at a bigger funky looking woman with blonde hair texting on on her phone and she looked at me and smiled. I was thinking oh NO that can't be her, my gut sunk and all of a sudden I get a tap on my shoulder and I turn around to this knock out blonde who smiles and says hello. That was a cool moment from oh NO to hell yeah and I hung out with that chic for 6months. Online dating has it's moments |
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Hah. Bertha had her eye on you. |
That's a pretty creative excuse....now the post disappeared lol
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