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Jilly 03-05-2009 10:19 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by keg in kc (Post 5557145)
I do it because I don't want my heart to explode at 40. The enjoyment will come later when my body (finally) becomes acclimated to it. Right now, though, it's a little too hard and a lot too painful to be enjoyable (until it's over and I get the endorphins). Right now, having a goal is motivation, a reason to do this until it becomes a habit, part of my lifestyle.

(On the flip side, however, my love for cheese, grease and sugar is not yet surpassed by my desire to keep my heart from exploding at 40. So I'm fighting a battle on two fronts.)

Anyway, I don't think there's anything wrong with doing it to look better, but maybe one ought to try a mindset of becoming "even better" instead of going from ugly duckling to golden goose. Look at yourself in a more positive light.

I get it, for health reasons, yadda yadda. But you're health is dependent upon so much more then working out. I work out cuz when I do it, it feels awesome. But, there's no way that working out and looking good is gonna be the solution to all my problems. There's so much more to confidence and esteem. Are you doing what you love to do work wise? Are you doing things you are passionate about? Do you value your mind and do you do things to stimulate it? Are you laughing and smiling? Those things don't come with working out, but they have EVERYTHING to do with happiness and respect of who you are. And yet everyone emphasizes so much "working out" when it's a tiny part of a way bigger picture.

luv 03-05-2009 10:22 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by keg in kc (Post 5557154)
I've heard you mention a time or three that you tend towards that sort of behavior yourself. See a bit of yourself in them, and resent them for it, or is that too simplistic?

That's a fair assessment. They are definitely much worse about it than I am though. They get attached just because I've helped them out. I get attached because I have several things in common with someone. These guys don't typically even know me hardly at all. Probably the same concept, though, huh? Different type of connect.

keg in kc 03-05-2009 10:24 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jilly (Post 5557158)
I get it, for health reasons, yadda yadda. But you're health is dependent upon so much more then working out. I work out cuz when I do it, it feels awesome. But, there's no way that working out and looking good is gonna be the solution to all my problems. There's so much more to confidence and esteem. Are you doing what you love to do work wise? Are you doing things you are passionate about? Do you value your mind and do you do things to stimulate it? Are you laughing and smiling? Those things don't come with working out, but they have EVERYTHING to do with happiness and respect of who you are. And yet everyone emphasizes so much "working out" when it's a tiny part of a way bigger picture.

Never said it wasn't. All I'm saying is that goals can help you make a positive change inside yourself. Best way that I can think of to describe it is to that if you were the kind of person who did it for the pure joy of working out, odds are you wouldn't need to lose weight or do it for health reasons, etc, in the first place. It takes time and effort to stop being a couch potato and goals are a good way to keep yourself on point...

That is all.

luv 03-05-2009 10:25 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jilly (Post 5557158)
I get it, for health reasons, yadda yadda. But you're health is dependent upon so much more then working out. I work out cuz when I do it, it feels awesome. But, there's no way that working out and looking good is gonna be the solution to all my problems. There's so much more to confidence and esteem. Are you doing what you love to do work wise? Are you doing things you are passionate about? Do you value your mind and do you do things to stimulate it? Are you laughing and smiling? Those things don't come with working out, but they have EVERYTHING to do with happiness and respect of who you are. And yet everyone emphasizes so much "working out" when it's a tiny part of a way bigger picture.

I would say I'm pretty much happy other than my weight. I don't always like to work, but I like my job. I could start writing more again. I love to laugh and make others smile. I have my moods, but I'm usually charaterized by the people who know me as being very optimistic. Working out and eating right are habits I'm working on developing. I don't always enjoy working out, but I definitely like the way I feel afterwards.

keg in kc 03-05-2009 10:26 AM

It's very bizarre hearing myself talking like this, as anybody who knew me five years ago could attest to.

Jilly 03-05-2009 10:29 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by keg in kc (Post 5557169)
Never said it wasn't. All I'm saying is that goals can help you make a positive change inside yourself. Best way that I can think of to describe it is to that if you were the kind of person who did it for the pure joy of working out, odds are you wouldn't need to lose weight or do it for health reasons, etc, in the first place. It takes time and effort to stop being a couch potato and goals are a good way to keep yourself on point...

That is all.

All I was saying is that I just think it's stupid for someone to think it will solve all their problems, like all of a sudden they'll feel 100% better. Maybe initially, but in the long run, it's that other stuff that means more.

luv 03-05-2009 10:29 AM

Well, I'm off to go to the doctor to have this lump in my armpit checked out. I'll catch you guys on the flip side.

luv 03-05-2009 10:31 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jilly (Post 5557183)
All I was saying is that I just think it's stupid for someone to think it will solve all their problems, like all of a sudden they'll feel 100% better. Maybe initially, but in the long run, it's that other stuff that means more.

Whoa. I must have really given the wrong impression. Working out will not solve all of my problems. It will, though, help me lose weight. Let's not take it to an extreme.

Jilly 03-05-2009 10:32 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by luv (Post 5557170)
I would say I'm pretty much happy other than my weight. I don't always like to work, but I like my job. I could start writing more again. I love to laugh and make others smile. I have my moods, but I'm usually charaterized by the people who know me as being very optimistic. Working out and eating right are habits I'm working on developing. I don't always enjoy working out, but I definitely like the way I feel afterwards.

You're posts don't always come off this way though, right? Or am I just reading too much into things?

keg in kc 03-05-2009 10:33 AM

As for Jilly's other questions:

Are you doing what you love to do work wise?
No. I've yet to encounter something I love to do. And I really hate working, too. The whole concept of it. But you gotta keep a roof over your head.

Are you doing things you are passionate about? No, similar to work that I love, I've never come across anything that I feel anything about, much less passion.

Do you value your mind and do you do things to stimulate it? Yes.

Are you laughing and smiling? Yes.


I'm hoping that writing becomes that 'work that I love'/'thing that I'm passionate about', but right now it's an exercise in resistance. It's very hard, and I tend to migrate towards the path of least resistance. So it's going to be a long, hard fight against myself and my tendencies. And the reality is it's something that I dreamed about/thought about/talked about for a ****ing DECADE, so the odds of it actually going anywhere are slim.

keg in kc 03-05-2009 10:35 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by luv (Post 5557185)
Well, I'm off to go to the doctor to have this lump in my armpit checked out. I'll catch you guys on the flip side.

G'luck.

keg in kc 03-05-2009 10:37 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jilly (Post 5557183)
All I was saying is that I just think it's stupid for someone to think it will solve all their problems, like all of a sudden they'll feel 100% better. Maybe initially, but in the long run, it's that other stuff that means more.

Well, in many, many instances I think the extra weight is a sign of deeper-seeded problems. It's a result, not the root. But I also think taking the time and effort to work on it is a sign that those issues are being dealt with, as well.

keg in kc 03-05-2009 10:38 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jilly (Post 5557193)
You're posts don't always come off this way though, right? Or am I just reading too much into things?

I don't think you're reading too much.

Jilly 03-05-2009 11:05 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by keg in kc (Post 5557200)
As for Jilly's other questions:

Are you doing what you love to do work wise?
No. I've yet to encounter something I love to do. And I really hate working, too. The whole concept of it. But you gotta keep a roof over your head.

Are you doing things you are passionate about? No, similar to work that I love, I've never come across anything that I feel anything about, much less passion.

Do you value your mind and do you do things to stimulate it? Yes.

Are you laughing and smiling? Yes.


I'm hoping that writing becomes that 'work that I love'/'thing that I'm passionate about', but right now it's an exercise in resistance. It's very hard, and I tend to migrate towards the path of least resistance. So it's going to be a long, hard fight against myself and my tendencies. And the reality is it's something that I dreamed about/thought about/talked about for a ****ing DECADE, so the odds of it actually going anywhere are slim.

I would say those first two issues lead to the majority of people's dissatisfaction with life. So many people have just gotten stuck in their job without any hope of getting out. Part of me thinks this lay off thing for some folks might be a good thing for the world, because it might just help people start doing what they feel good doing. I guarantee EVERYONE has a passion for something and if you can get that passion to correlate to your job, that's happiness right there.

I think that working out, etc, is great, but that one's probably the easiest of the goals to realize. I think the others take way more strength, creativity and courage.

keg in kc 03-05-2009 11:47 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jilly (Post 5557307)
I would say those first two issues lead to the majority of people's dissatisfaction with life. So many people have just gotten stuck in their job without any hope of getting out. Part of me thinks this lay off thing for some folks might be a good thing for the world, because it might just help people start doing what they feel good doing. I guarantee EVERYONE has a passion for something and if you can get that passion to correlate to your job, that's happiness right there.

I think that working out, etc, is great, but that one's probably the easiest of the goals to realize. I think the others take way more strength, creativity and courage.

I think that depends on the person. There's a lot of chubby folks who are crazy successful in the world of business. What's easy for one may not be for another.

Anyway, let's say it is the easiest for the sake of argument, that's no reason not to do it or to feel going about doing it. Maybe it's the first step on a bigger journey.

As for me, my philosophy on work is the same as it is with relationships. Sometimes you have to acquiesce to reality. I'm not going to find any new passion at this point in my life. In no small part because I'm not a passionate person. I'm just not. I'm about as apathetic as you can be while still having a heartbeat. Beyond that, I made (or didn't make) decisions in my 20s that set the course for the rest of my life. That's just the way it is; I don't get to climb into a wayback machine for a do-over. But what I can do is make the best life out of what I have. And that's exactly what I'm doing.


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