Yeah, it's just not sustainable in the long term. Once a few years ago, I had been working so freakin' much over a 3-4 month period, it took me 4 nights into my vacation to stop dreaming about work.

I think it's all about what you're expecting to get out of the work and what you're getting back for your efforts.

I've been asked by college kids, "will I have to work more than 40 hours/week", and I want to tell them they picked the wrong industry and that's certainly not the attitude someone should have early in their career.... and I've heard people who work 40.0000 hours/week bitch about never seeing a decent raise.

I've also heard plenty of people say they put in tons of hours and never see any benefit at review time, much less recognition or anything else.

I'd tell early career people to work hard and work a lot, but don't get abused. There are a lot of industries where you're simply expected to work OT at times, whether it's seasonal/fiscal year end/project go lives/etc. That doesn't mean you should be expected to work 50+ hours/week and then 60 or 70 or 80 hours/week during crunch time... it's something you definitely have to manage to avoid complete burnout (the kind that can't be fixed by a week of vacation).

OTOH, if your company isn't rewarding you at review time, either find a new company or stop working so much for them.

I think people in IT try to be the company gem when they come in and try to get a project over the hump by putting in more hours. Over time, they come to expect it.

Work a productive 40 from the start and just don't give them the expectation you're gonna work another 20 every week. If you get a rash of shit for it, move on or demand more salary to compensate.

Too many workers underestimate their power in not pandemic times.

Burnout? **** yes I have. Worked for the same company for 18 years. Same company I had worked since I turned 19. Got pretty burned out there to say the least. Then in April, the virus ended the company so I've been sitting on my ding dong for the last 4 months not knowing what the hell I'm gonna do next.

Yeah, I think this is universal to all I.T. No matter the part of I.T. your in. All the issues you see are probably happening at the shop down the street. Grass isnt greener.

There was a period of 10-15 years when I pursued the biggest projects at the biggest companies using the latest tech. But, it came at the cost you mention 70-80 hour work weeks. Got paid well but eventually burned out.

To the OP I've changed careers and career paths when I wasn't happy. It was a gamble each time. Its really hard to do when you have a family to support. Just plan it out. Get your wife and family to buy in to this new path.

We swapped resumes didn't we? I have 20+ technical certifications. Not a single one braindumped. I have to do this shit in the real world. Cant shortcut the tech or yourself in the real world. You cant hide. Everyone will know your tech skills in a few months anyway. I'll set aside time on the weekend to deep dive into the new tech. I'll watch a baseball game and set up stuff to practice with. I do still love the learning of new tech. That helps.

I get that too. I've worked remotely for 7.5 of the last 8 years. At first I was obsessed with proving I could be productive and work from home. I did a lot of extra work. I stopped after about 2 years when I realized it wasn't sustainable. No ****ing way I'm ever going back to cubicle work. I'll go for a little while to a client site when doing a restore from a ransomware attack but thats only a couple of weeks.

To the OP about working remote..... I had a lot of the same issues you mentioned. I think you need a distraction away from your job. Something totally different.

When my son was young and wanted to play competitive baseball team, I managed the team. Working in tech all day, then being around a kids game played in the dirt and grass worked for me. When I moved to Florida I missed watching the Chiefs with other Chief fans. I started Arrowhead South. Spent a lot of my leisure time building it out, getting chapters up and going. No money involved. Just a love of the Chiefs and definitely a non tech activity.

Whatever you have a passion for, set some time aside for it no matter what, it'll keep you sane.

In my experience, the people who go the route of "pay me more if you want more hours" don't get more pay nearly as often as those who prove it first.... of course, there's no guarantee, but I've been fairly lucky with managers who will give it to me straight in that regard.

It depends on priorities though... if someone is happy salary-wise, then 40 hour work weeks will of course be ideal. I just get annoyed when people want it both ways, refusing to work more than 40 hours/week while bitching about never getting a decent raise and getting ahead.

I worked 3750 hours last year. Does that make me a moron?

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Do you get time and a half? Or at least paid by the hour?

Or are you just a self-employed farmer who tracks how many hours you work?

Sure have. It came to an end in April. I had a 2 month break from work and it refreshed me.

I have an SCorp so I have to pay myself a reasonable wage as dictated by the IRS. Nothing is more reasonable than an hourly wage. Plus the separation of my personal finances from the business is beneficial for me. Perhaps just psychologically, but it’s what I need to do.

I also work for an accountant during tax season as an hourly and anything I do on dads farm is hourly. So yeah. I keep hours.

No OT.

Yeah man. It’s different when it’s your money that goes out the window when shit doesn’t happen.

I’m going to go back and read the thread, more than I’ve barely skimmed parts of it so far. I’ve thought about reading more, and maybe even responding. But let’s go with sharing first


Yes. Yes. Yes. More than I would wish on anyone. Sometimes it feels like a burnout every other couple months. Started 6 years ago. Hands up don’t shoot. The fallout, the recovery. Another fallout another recovery. And that’s just society jumping up and down over all cops are nazis to understanding Kap in any way makes you unamerican.

But personally, feeling the divide tearing like pulling flesh, slowly and pain filled. Over 6 years. Loss of friends and family connections over just being a police officer. Nothing more specific than wearing a badge.

It’s feeling never ending right now. 6 years, everyday getting harder, more scrutiny, from friends and family. It’s not just random strangers.

They suck sometimes too. Had a stranger ask me not to be too mean to a stalking black teen ex of her white daughter. Because “i know how you cops are with black people”.

There is a gigantic gap between perceived injustices and actual injustices over the last 6 years. And too many vocal opinions, and actions; are burning out many in the law enforcement community. All. Over. The. Country.

I’m really surprised it’s gotten to this point. But then again, covid only kills less than 1% of positive cases, and covid is a big problem in america media stories. Similar to cops killing black people (not even taking into consideration if it’s justified or not) and that’s the bigger story than all other reasons for black deaths, any deaths, in the BLM movement.

Yet it’s those like me, the American devil (literally hitler) who is judged for the color of his/her uniform, that is the “real problem” through out america today, according to the vocal majority right now.

Simply speaking. Yes.

Yes

Yes, I understand burnout. I am burnt the **** out. I don’t know how to go from this point in time right now.

Thank you for serving your community, crazycoffee

Burn out? Yes. Got 4 years to go and my kids will be off my payroll. Life will be easier.

Going out on a limb here--It will make me sound like a big fat marshmallow.

It has taken a lot of guts for us all (me included) to pour out our guts here. Publically.
I want the best for everyone here and hope you can overcome the challenges that are happening to you. None of us are alone. Either here or at home.

Get help. Talk to someone. Get it off your chest. Doctors understand. Xanax is not necessarily a bad thing.


Therapy helped me-but I may need to go back. As of now, I will be back into almost the same situation as I was in Feb. Although bitch that called me a racist is gone. She may be responding to a shooting in MPLS soon.

Done. It is getting foggy in here.

ROFL Man are you in for a shock.

I've never received mental therapy but the stigma is stupid. Your not weak because you get mental help. That some idiots think that pisses me off.

I've seen it help so many people. Made a big difference in their life. I've always saw therapy as a legit health option as any other part of your healthcare.

I'd like to see the acceptance of mental therapy accepted as legit by everyone soon. Thanks for sharing.

:thumb:

Self-pride is real literal killer at times. Worst case I ever dealt with in reference to self-pride however, didn't come from a man but from a woman. I was counseling this teenage kid 16(male) who was dealing with depression. His parents forced him to go. I started digging as to how he was self-medicating for that and he said, "I like alcohol". Started digging deeper as to how much and often and it was tremendous. He was hiding the hard stuff in the toilet tank from his parents and killing at least a quart almost everyday. His parents had no idea he even drank or they just chose to ignore the signs. At that time the movie "Clean and Sober" with Michael Keaton had just come out. I told him go watch that movie and then come back and let's talk about it. To say the least, he came back and was even more brutally honest in his drinking and said, "I am Keaton but with alcohol". He loved the movie because he saw hope and a way out. I told him now we need to bring your parents in and have a family discussion about not only your drinking issue but what makes you drink. His main issue was his mother who was southern born mind you and made John Wayne look like a pussy.

To say the least, the father and the kid were all on board to getting inpatient tx. And their insurance covered treatment mind you. But the mother ? She said, " No son of mine has a drinking problem and this is just a phase and we will get through it". The son at that point begged his mother over and over and said, "I'm sick Mom, I'm sick and I need serious help"(with tears in his eyes). I then intervened, so as to show the mother how sick he was and said to the son, "Tell your mom how much you drink and where you have all the hard stuff hid all over the house right now." After the son told her, the look she gave me across the table was as though she briefly turned into Satan and wanted to obliterate me right then and there on the spot. But she turned back to her son and said, "You have no drinking problem and we will get through this". The father was just quietly passive through all of this which said volumes about who wore the pants in the family. Even though the son was close to his father you could also see the son was severely disappointed let down again by his father's passivity to intervene and take charge regardless of the mother's selfish pride. Understand this was just only the 3rd session.

This kid was a hardcore drinker and no outpatient was going to work and I knew that and so did he and his father. But his mom would have none of it. Just sad.

This works both ways and I think you aren't quite on the same page with me here. There's a difference between working 80+ hours a week slamming your head against the wall for your employer and working your 40 hours and taking some of your own time to learn things that interest you and invest in your own continuing education.

That's different from someone who works the 40 and goes home to play video games all weekend or watch public access TV. I do not put in a minute over 40 hours on the actual job, but I do spend time advancing my own ability. At the same time, I'm not going to pretend I know it all because it's just imposters syndrome.

With that said, you have to look at it from the employers prospective. Why the **** should we hire another person so Bearcat can have a reasonable life when he's already doing the work of two people? We're saving money. On the same token, why should we pay Bearcat more when they're already doing all this shit at salary X?

If you really need to work 80 hours a week to get anything more well I'm truly sorry. When I had my early mid-life crisis I checked out a company doing something completely different and how they tried to sell you on your own self-worth being tied to working 7 days a week 10+ hours a day was Top 5 grossest things I've dealt with in my working life. Is the money really worth it if your life is a pile of shit? I know people who rack in 150k+ a year as an AWS specialist and don't even work 40 a week. I know it's not impossible.

I'm not sitting on 20 plus, but I've racked up 3 in the last year and would have 4 if not for COVID-19. Hoping to get one more in before the year is up.

I'm starting to learn in this industry that it's perfectly fine to not know everything. I admit it all the time at my current job.

It's okay because your co-worker and your boss probably doesn't know either. Show a willingness to learn and that you can do your own research and pick things up quickly. I think that's the one thing I really learned after being put on furlough and think that's why I got this current job.

Makes sense, and there are definitely areas where you can get sucked into very company-specific tech, so it's important to keep broader/industry-wide skills up to date.

My devil's advocate to those questions...
- I've never seen a company actually hire anyone to specifically relieve someone of extra hours, and I'm not sure it would ever happen if those extra hours are seasonal or something like go live support, where people are working a ton more for a relatively short amount of time before going back to a much more reasonable workload.
I've worked for companies in growth spurts for sure, hiring people left and right, and while it is in the end the company's fault.... the reality is help (probably) isn't coming, and....

- The flip side of the 2nd question is -- we already have x number of people working a ton of hours, why should we give Bearcat a raise before he starts doing the same? We could just find someone else who will work 60 hours/week.
As I mentioned before, the extra hours are no guarantee of raises, just that it's the best bet in the IT world, from my experience.

And I've had it both ways... I was at one company and received a couple of ~2-3% raises over two years, and probably averaged 50-60 hours/week. So, I left, and the next company and managers there really saw the value in the extra hours, taking on more projects, mentoring, etc; and I really saw the benefits from it.

That just goes back to having those conversations with management on what you're looking for....
- What's my salary ceiling right now? How do I get there, or advance to the next level?
- I want to be making x% more a few years from now, is that possible? How so?
- I'm looking at this kind of salary trajectory, what does that take?
- I want highly visible projects, or to move to this area, how can I prove myself?

In my experience, a lot of people don't drive their own career growth or salary growth in this way, and make assumptions on whether their extra work/effort will pay off... and as I said before, set the expectation and have those discussions, and if they don't work out, either find something else or reset your own expectations (such as working less hours).

There are of course still managers who aren't transparent and still companies that get away with abusing employees.... yet, employees have more leverage these days than ever before. Specific to IT, employers know you can simply find a new job every couple years and get decent bumps on salary. The managers and companies that figure this out will do what it takes to retain their best and hardest working talent.

Nah, just under 60 hours/week during the craziest years. Granted, that's still several 70-80 hour work weeks, shit has to be completely out of control for me to kick it into that gear.

The only time I've experienced true burnout, is during my 2+ year stint as a truck driver

12-13 hour days on the road are a genuine grind and they dont take long to add up... over the road guys are limited to 11 hour days, but grain haulers in this state have an exemption

In bed at 9, up at 3 for a 12-13 hour day?

Piss off

to qualify myself....80 hour work weeks were on short contracts to restore ransom ware when the company is losing millions, sometimes 10’s of millions $’s a day. They are more than happy to compensate you for the sleepless nights. Usually I’m working 45-50 hours a week. Reasonable hours to me.

Yeah, I might have killed myself by now in these situations, heh... where it's either maximizing profit of my own business or $$ per mile or whatever.

good on you to not brain dump the cert’s. It might get you by HR that you checked that box and they pass you on to the hiring manager but unless you really know the tech, your not getting past the interview. So it’s wasted time and money to try to shortcut the tech.

Yeah, I've never minded 9-10 hours/day and rarely work less than that (granted, unlike when I was younger, I make it a priority to use all PTO)... feels productive, yet doesn't really impact getting home at a decent hour and doesn't impact the weekends (for the most part).

Sixty starts getting extreme when it's week after week, as you're either taking away from weekends or not doing much else besides work on the other 5 days. That's when it starts becoming more difficult to find the motivation to workout, etc.

When I left the Army when I turned 40, I told myself my days of working "for free" were over. When I joined my current company, if I'm supposed to work 176 hours that month, that's what I work. Now, does that mean I necessarily clock out right at 5? Nope, but if I'm 4 hours ahead come end of the time card, then I'm taking a half-day off on time-card day. Also, they allow us to work ahead so if I know I'm going to be out of town on a three-day weekend, I'll try to put in an hour here/hour there to minimize the amount of PTO I have to take.

The way I've avoided burn-out is my company is big enough and has enough projects that I've always been able to move to a new contract after 3+ years on an assignment. So, about the time I start going "I really don't want to go in to work today", that's when I start checking the internal help-wanted web pages and applying for a new assignment. That's helped a lot by being able to shift to a new assignment, new co-workers and keep me interested and fresh.

Have I maybe missed a few promotions? Yes, on-purpose. When I was hired 21 years ago, I told them I had no interest in management. I'd been a senior NCO and learned quickly the two things I hated the most were meetings and paperwork. Just give me interesting work, give me the occasional COL raise and Mrs. White's boy is a happy person. And I'm still with the company 21 years later while most of the "hard-chargers" have burnt themselves out and quit after 3-7 years.

I guess those higher paychecks were worth it to them. Me? I'd rather do my 40 and go home and spend time with my family.

ROFL

Averaging 72 hours a week? Perhaps. You look at TPS and Muda, Muri, and Mura. It's obvious there's Muri here. Are there others to distribute that workload to? Are there activities that aren't fruitful and largely a waste (muda)?

I say that because I watch an owner of the company I work for do a lot of the same. He complains more than I do about burnout and how much he works.

The problem for him is likely different from you, but he feels this urge to micromanage and have his fingertips on everything that goes on. He has a great staff that can run the company without him, seriously. He's a smart guy and hires the right people. The problem is he just can't let those people do their jobs.

My advice to him has been to work smarter, not harder. It seems simplistic, but its truly the issue at hand for him. He needs, and maybe you too, to define the things that he should focus on and be responsible for and schedule them throughout his week. If its a non-value add process, should you be focusing on it? If its of no real or immediate benefit to you or the customer, dump it or at least put it on the back burner until its reasonable to work on. If its necessary for the customer, can you delegate it?

There was a company I worked for a decade+ ago where we did a specific TPS study and looked at the time we were spending on tasks. What we were surprised to find is that many of us were picking up the slack for others and working on tasks outside of our job description and what should have been our priorities. If I'm in accounting and doing 50% of an HR coordinators job, then I should probably replace the coordinator. Of course, I'm in a smaller company now and wear both hats, but my accounting workload has went down and I can absorb that adminstration segment. That is probably the case for many in a similar role. In any event, be careful the number of hats you try to wear. You find yourself becoming wildly inefficient at everything rather than efficient at a few tasks.

If I were in your shoes and I'm putting in 72 hours a week, I definitely would consider adding at least a part-time employee to delegate some workload to. Re-prioritize your workload and figure out what are the most important tasks for you to handle. Its not especially sustainable to continue on the path you're on.

2019 was a confluence of ****. I'm headed for a lot of hours in 2020, but hopefully fewer. Some of it is on me, sure. But logistically it's going better.

I'm pretty efficient. I've removed virtually all the non-value added activities from my workload.

As far as the structure, there is my farm, dad's farm and a couple other ancillary entities that don't matter. I have some operations and dad has some operations that we pay each other for. In 2019 he had a full time and a part time dude working for him and I had none. I reimbursed him for the little bit of labor they did on me.

2019 had a bunch of weird shit. First and foremost Dad's fulltime and partime guys were shit they barely did anything, meanwhile dad and I were killing ourselves.

Second, I crammed a fairly big system change in our operation in the winter, which typically I work fewer hours. So that added a lot of hours to a normally slow time.

Third, the spring was goddamned wet. That did 2 things, 1, allowed us to move a lot of acres to fall crops that we hadn't planned on, which really stacked up a bunch more work in an already busy timeframe. So much so that I hired out some acres to go under one of my machines. Great way to NOT make money, but it is what needed to happen. Then when it came time to roll, it stayed wet, further compressing the busy timeframe. So I worked my ever loving ass off.

Fourth, I made some agronomic changes that needed some additional management to incorporate properly, because we hadn't done them before.

As far as moving forward, That shitheel guy isn't around anymore. The part time guy is now full time, and his work is better, but he wants a lot of time off. So the answer is obviously to hire more employees. But that's a tough ask in my part of the world. Everybody has labor problems it seems like and objectively, a lot of places can pay more than I can. Labor management will be pretty big moving forward as dad slows down.

Also, margins are ass. So it's difficult to make structural decisions which will further erode my already shit margins, which in 2020 are certainly going to be negative.

And I'm pretty efficient. I already eliminated most every non-value added activity from my life. Dad and his guy do some piddly shit, but I don't. I GTFO if I'm caught up.

There are also some functions that lend itself to screwing up my life, most importantly is irrigation, but I push the structure pretty hard, which puts me out there at 3 AM or whenever it needs swapping. But I'm doing it because it pays compared to the alternatives. So I do it. I run the numbers pretty studiously, so I continually evaluate operations and am not afraid to make systemic changes.

All that being said, I'm not burned out. I make time for my kids, and my wife does a good job of bringing them out when they can. Overall, I'm pretty happy. I'm also pretty self-aware and can objectively analyze my mental state.

It's not what I should be doing almost certainly, and definitely wouldn't be if I could secure higher level labor, but it's not in the cards and it's what I'm doing.

Well shit, I just looked at my payroll and I've already worked 2100 hours. I'll for sure be over 3000, but hopefully I can keep it around 3200 and under the 3700 I did last year.

3 years ago my wife and I were on top of the world financially. No mortgage, very little debt, disposable income to do whatever the **** we wanted. And at the same time I was going through the worst work experience of my life. Went through several phases of burnout and depression. Ended up making major changes in our lives, and as a result, all that financial security is gone now. We'll probably never be back where we were, and I couldn't care any less, we're much happier now. You can't buy your sanity back for any amount of money.

What post? :evil:

Good stuff Buehler. I won't quote your whole post. I'm assuming now that I've read your post that you're in grain farming based on narrow margins?

Are you big enough to make good use of crop rotation? What about GIS/Geomatics?

Just curious as I've never really been much into the farming world, just looked at it passively on how to increase margins because I work for a GIS company and was trying to see if we could fit Agri into our realm.

Buehler- you are a star in my book. Working 70 plus hours a week and keeping it logical/real is impressive. It takes a special kind of drive and vision to pull that off- regardless of vocation!
Good on you!

I returned to work today after 4.5 months off due to treatment and isolation. I have never felt such an overwhelming sense of dread and emptiness in my entire life.

The only time I've felt something similar is moving schools in third grade, going from a small, private school where multiple grades were in one classroom, to a traditional public school setting where I didn't know a single person in my class.

I think I've come to realize that I like the idea of what my job can be, but I have no taste for the minutiae of what is actually is. I feel even worse because they supported me while I was sick, and now that I'm back I feel like it's the last place in the world I want to be. I felt like that before I took leave, but I assumed that it was the stress of chemo and the uncertainty around COVID. Now I'm realizing that those were contributing factors, not causative.

Yeah. I farm. Yeah, margins are ass.

I PMd you my email. Dad was a pretty strict rotation guy forever. I’ve been trying to push because frankly I can’t afford to fallow, big part of 2019 being 2019 was dad switched a bunch of acres out of rotation.

I’m pretty efficient on the technology for our size but don’t utilize any telematics. Lots of GIS though.

I’m pretty decent on the nuts and bolts of practical application of different technology systems.

Shoot me an email. I can get you some end user perspective and if I’m too small I can point you to some guys that are big. We aren’t the corn belt, but frankly we have to manage better in a lot of aspects because we can’t make margin like they can. They have some stuff we don’t have to worry about, too.

Shoot me an email.

Bad news Hamas. Are you at least back on your feet health wise?

Don’t make any rash decisions on the job front just yet. Some of the feelings might settle down. Much like 3rd grade (assuming 3rd grade settled down).

I've experienced it. The same thing every day. Go to work, listen to people be a pain in the ass, listen to employees bitch about everything. Go home. Make dinner. Walk dog. Hang with fam. Go to bed. Same shit next day. I seriously thought about going back to school for something totally different. I was in my mid 40's.

I started walking at lunch, making knives at home, fishing more, hunting more, and not listening to the bitching at work. Basically I quit giving a **** about someone else having a bad day because I wasn't gonna let it affect mine. I'm 53 now and much better. I'm taking more time off work too.

I don't know about you, but i get really tired of hearing excuses from employees why they didn't do this or that, then within the same sentence bitching about not making more money.

I finally realized recently that holding on to an employee too long is a problem. Moving on and doing things different now.

I'm with Buehler and not being hasty but maybe not for the same reasons. I've found that if I'm patient, the solution to my problem (a different job) often comes around. I've worked almost 20 years for the same company but in now 7 different roles. I change about every 3 years and it's worked well for me to maintain continuity of benefits and not having the stress of changing companies but still getting a change of role that is refreshing and new.

yep.

You know what else burns me out, dealing with ****ing Comcast.

This isn't aimed at you. It's just an observation.

I've been in the workforce for 30 years. I have found, all too often, that employers are really bad at sitting down and setting expectations with their employees and following through with them. We overlook, ignore, make exceptions, etc for poor performance in order to make our own job easier, so we don't have to confront and actually "manage" our employees. You end up kicking the can down the road too far until the situation becomes completely untenable.

If you set clear expectations upfront and manage them along the way, it is much easier to attain the expected performance or to move on. jmho

I've seen plenty of employers run off very good employees by treating them like garbage while in the same breath bitching about how they can't find good help anymore.

Shit goes both ways.

I've definitely fallen into that before. This time was different, don't wanna get into it here but it is what it is. Glad to have it over and hopefully moving forward.

All CP BS aside, CP is not good for people who are in a place where they are feeling down. A break from all social media and maybe all media is in order when these feelings come, IMO. One of the best things you can do for yourself is to unplug.

Truth right here. I disconnected quite a bit this spring and early summer. Went and did things to periodically escape from reality.

Definitely.

I'm about to take a bit of a sabbatical myself, probably until the season fires up.

Need a break.

I did this very thing a couple of years ago and it's absolutely great advice.

I had a job from 2010 to 2017 that was like family. We hung out together regularly, went to each other's weddings, etc. Most days it didn't even feel like going to work. It just felt like going to hang out with your friends and work on cool projects.

That is everything imo. I was part of a village that worked together and looked out for each other. There was even plenty of room for village weirdos like me. If I could have a situation like that my whole life, I don't think I would need much else to be content.

Can confirm.

I used to enjoy being on Twitter and FB a lot, on top with CP and such.

Now?

Twitter is just a shit-fest and FB is also in that category, especially with people behaving as immature individuals and sharing so much stuff that isn't exactly truthful. It's like it's middle/high school bullshit going on. And when I see that happen, I just have the sudden urge to bark at them to knock it off, but I realize that if I were to do that, I'm playing right into their hands.

So I just severely restricted my online time on Twitter and FB, and I feel better about it, because it's shit that I just have no control over, and don't really need to deal with it. And it's more refreshing actually.

As for CP, I just stick with threads that is sports related and have discussions there, along with interesting topics, like this one being an good example.

And edited: The more I realize (as I learn), it's just better to just focus on things that you have control over than to worry about things that you don't have any control over.

Yeah. Social media (Twitter, Facebook, CP, etc) have turned into one big trailer park.

I avoid that shit, lately I've been playing animal crossing, that game relaxes me.

Basically the only reason I'm on FB anymore is because I have the ability to block pages and snooze people when they get on a roll with something (granted, I've also unfriended several people).

I'm probably in the hundreds when it comes to blocked pages and apps and stuff, mostly because FB got rid of "just show me everything in chronological order" long ago, and the bullshit seems to win over stuff I'd actually want to see.

It can definitely be beneficial to take breaks from all that shit... I've done it here several times, usually for 2-3 months at a time.

My 16-year old daughter loves Animal Crossing. :hmmm:

:p

I have a couple thousand friends and pages. I actually follow about 20.

All of my social media accounts were being hacked constantly, so in 2017, I deactivated Facebook and cancelled my Instagram and Twitter accounts. Not only was I tired of political talk 24/7 but seeing friends argue over politics on my timeline was pretty much the last straw.

Unfortunately, many of the companies I deal with use social media platforms so I reactivated Facebook and created new Twitter & Instagram accounts in the past few weeks because I was missing out on a lot of pertinent info.

I've basically unfollowed 2/3rd of my Facebook "friends" (most of whom I haven't seen or spoken to in decades) and just use it for those important music-business related accounts, but I've yet to post and have zero plans to interact on that particular platform.

Oh, and back to the topic: I definitely felt far less stress once I deactivated all of them. It was like a weight lifted from my shoulders.

Funny this thread is on here.

I finally decided to deactivate my FB, Snapchat, and Instagram last night. The Snapchat was just used to interact with girls, and they have my number if they want to talk or meet up. But in general I think social media just clouds everyones minds and it often times becomes a jumbled mess of people acting as their worst kind of ways. Facebook is just a giant political disaster plus those stupid beer chugging and quarantitties groups on there, it just showcases the worst kinds of people in society.

I think mental health is incredibly important, but I also believe that we still don't know the long term psychological effects of social media on our brains. It has completely rewired the way we think and interact as humans. But I think long term there will be some serious negative effects and we're likely already seeing it unfold.

Looking forward to putting my attention elsewhere and not having that distraction take over my day.

If you're having trouble with CP, maybe ask a mod to ban you for a specified period? There's really nothing positive to discuss right now that's Chiefs related anyway. You can't really take your account down here like you can on other social media, but being unable to post might remove the incentive to come around if it's bringing you down.

Going on a good racial rant is always a good way to get a ban if thats something you're looking for.

You must spread some Reputation around before giving it to DaneMcCloud again.

That's awesome. I remember when you did that and it's cool that it worked out so well for you.

Did something very similar. Owned an insurance brokerage in Tempe over a decade ago. Represented 27 different insurance companies and specialized in health insurance. Became disillusioned when I ended up spending more time at the AZ Dept. of Insurance fighting on behalf of my clients against the companies I repped than I spent generating new business. I can sell ice cubes to eskimos if I believe in the product, but I'm the world's worst salesman if I don't. Just couldn't do it anymore once I lost confidence in the companies I was repping.

Sold my entire book of business to another big brokerage, had garage sales on a weekly basis until I sold everything I owned except for what would fit into 2 suitcases, sold my crib and moved to San Jose Costa Rica - where I knew absolutely no one. Got a job with BetOnSports.com, an "offshore" casino which was the world's biggest online sports book at the time. Had so, so much fun. Had a cool place, met a bunch of cool friends, had a little 90lb dancer chick named Maria move in with me, and just partied my freaking ass off. Almost had too much fun, though. Costa Rica was a little too close to Columbia/Bolivia/Peru for my own good.

Living abroad - especially in a country that has the caliber of female Costa Rica has - is something I can't recommend highly enough. For me it was absolutely life-changing. Very liberating to realize that the only barriers in your life are the ones you create. You can do anything and go anywhere if you want it bad enough and you put your mind to it.

Planned on being down there for at least 4 years unless I got a sweet job offer in the Denver/Boulder area. It was the only place in the US that I would've left San Jose for. Eventually got a job offer from Wells Fargo in Denver and the rest is history. Wouldn't change a moment of the entire experience, though. Changed my life in so many ways. Mainly just the knowledge that I can do anything I put my mind to, and that your past does not equal your future.

Here's where I worked in Costa Rica, and I was there for the Pussycat Dolls party. Lots of cocaine and loose, gorgeous women down there... :eek:

<iframe width="560" height="315" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/uessucl-AVQ" frameborder="0" allow="accelerometer; autoplay; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture" allowfullscreen></iframe>

Bowser does that shit to me without me even having to ask. He is such a thoughtful, caring mod.

I would be dead. I'd have been very happy, but I'd definitely be dead by now. Nice going though. Looks like it was a lot of fun.

I just can’t do Facebook. Wife periodically wants me to read something posted on there and rather than proper discourse between people that by definition know each other, it is closer to monkeys in trees throwing shit at each other while howling wildly.

I just can’t do it.

It's so frustrating. I used to love facebook, it was a great way to keep in touch with people and organize social events, etc. I'm pretty sure that was the original intent with it. I still begrudgingly use it since there's not really a viable alternative, but I don't participate in any of that bullshit.

I mostly just post hilarity such as this:


https://i.imgur.com/1LBF76O.jpg

The bolded underlined part pretty much describes social media to a T, in my opinion.

Facebook was amazing until the olds got on it. The old days of Facebook were perfect.

Twitter is great because it is what you make of it. If there is a bunch of horse shit on your feed the fault is yours and only yours. Twitter has so much funny, interesting, and informative stuff every day. Great community. Great way to expand your social and professional network as well.

Some of you working all of these hours in this thread. I respect it but do not understand it....work\life balance has always been such a big priority. I am pretty lucky I like my job...its always different and challenging and I get to help people. Its also grouped into 12 hour days which leaves for big chunks of time off.

Burn out wise it happens. I usually just slow things down when it comes up and try to enjoy the little things until you get your energy back.

I know I mentioned I work some long hours. 80 hours a week isn't uncommon.

What I didn't say is that I work from home and I have a workload queue. I work on large proposals, so when there's an active proposal, I might work 80 hours a week for 2-4 weeks.

But there's also period where there's ZERO live proposals and I literally just do reading and training, paperwork, and stuff like that. So I definitely have enough valleys to offset the stressful peaks that do happen.

I could imagine making that work....where you are in it but you see the finish line and you know there is good stuff behind it. Things gets very serious and stressful at my work can be life and death but I appreciate that I can clock out and get that separation.

I've determined I'm not wired like most folks. I'm way happier, even in 2019, than I was working my 2300 hr project based job in internal audit.

There is something real about getting actual things done. Compounded wholly by the fact that it is mine, I'm way happier. Is it healthy? No probably not, especially since I do a bunch of it at night so I can be with my family. But while this might not be physically healthy, where I was wasn't mentally healthy. Especially looking long term.

Hey man if you are healthy and happy that is what counts. Not for me but I know people just like that.

I agree. You have to spend the time and work to refine on the feeds for social media. I use social media a lot. News, niche stuff, Chiefs news. Arrowhead South doesn’t exist without Facebook. We are now putting together a global network of grass roots Chief fans. That doesn’t happen without Facebook.

I have very few people talking politics on my feeds. I never discuss politics or religion on social media.

I can see this as a valid opinion. You get some blunt honesty here. Try to BS and you’ll get called out. One persons Humor is crossing a line for another.

But, as our time being on the Planet has went on, so have our real lives. There is a certain comfort here. You may never have met the poster in person but you KNOW them. Personality , likes, dislikes etc. things may change in your real life, but here, it’s always kind of the same. That has value too in times of crisis.

I think everyone has a different profile of which online sources are more harm than good. Only you know which ones are your trouble spots.

I go on FB maybe 30 minutes a day. The traveler groups and my hiking group are pretty indispensable. Also I actually like keeping up with people. I really don't get sucked in too much because I've either unfollowed or snoozed anyone who agitates me, or they've done the same to me.

Twitter on the other hand is instant rage for me. I had to cut it off when covid started. I can still only go on in small doses. I have a list that's just sports. I'll go back on that when football starts.

CP isn't bad for me now that I'm finally not welching and honoring my DC-ban bet with stevieray.

There's a politics forum started by the exiled politics regs in the twoplustwo.com politics forum where even thought I mostly agree with everyone, I spend too much time and get myself agitated. I just self-banned for 2 weeks and I think I need to make it longer. But the hard part is they're kind of like my community, which matters a lot when you go days without seeing another person.

When you needed an .edu address, sure.

Twitter is a cum dumpster and always has been.

But, now we're the olds.

And...uhhh...you're also standing on my lawn...:grr:

One day, I plan on moving on to bug's lawn.