After seeing the names from 101 - 2, it is ridiculous that I'm not in there.
Therefore, I assume I'm #1. Thanks, but I don't think I deserve it. Top 101--yes (seriously, there are some lame-os in there)--but not #1. So please pick someone else. Appreciate it.

With me stepping aside, I assume that leaves #1 to the poster currently named Count Alex's Losses.
I love me some Rain Man, but Clay probably deserves it. Generally his posts are either kind of funny or make you want to punch him in the face.
He is clearly devoted to CP--just look at the sheer # of posts. He documents his days for us. He posted a pic of a toilet bowl full of his feces. That's originality and effort you don't see everyday.

Will the number 1 poster be able to make an off the cuff quip about BF Skinner? The deintellectuization of Chiefsplanet continues.

I don't think you understand.

You set me on mother****ing FIRE during the B29 bomber simulations.

I didn't just get shot with shrapnel or parachute out and get captured.

You said, "COMPUTER, WHAT'S HAPPENING IN SNR'S BOMBER? OKAY, THEY'RE GETTING HIT HARD BY GERMAN PLANES AND ANTI-AIRCRAFT AND... OH.... OH... UH... AWKWARD. SNR GETS SET ON FIRE AND DIES. INTERESTING."

YOU, SIR, ARE A MOTHER****ER. YOU'RE GODDAMN LUCKY I PUT YOU ON THE LIST AT ALL YOU ARROGANT ****ING DICK-BRAINED PIECE OF MOTHER****ING SHIT. EAT COCKS IN HELL, JIZZ MAN.

"Hey honey, how was your day?"

"Not bad, sweetie. The Chiefs Planet B-29 simulations are going very well. I even set this one dude on fire today. I totally expect that 10 or whatever years from now when they do this forum-wide ranking of the best posters that he'll put me as #1. Because you know... set a dude on fire, dude will think you're the coolest guy on the internet. It totally makes sense!"

There were fire extinguishers on board. Did you check them during your pre-flight walkaround? Did you know their location and how to pull the pin?

Clay is one of a handful of people who told me that DS9 was just as good if not better than TNG after I had just gotten through all of Picard's adventures. He helped change my life for the better.

Rain Man occasionally provided some interesting observations about other customers in a coffee shop, and I read his report when I was looking to procrastinate or waste time.

Clay has over 100,000 posts. The only such individual to accomplish that feat on the entire forum.

Rain Man does not have that many posts.

Clay has never simulated a scenario where I end up dying in a fire.

Rain Man has.

You all ****ing tell me what the scoreboard says. Because I see an objective score and an objective winner. You all seem to think this is ****ing ice skating. It's not. It's ****ing not.

Clay is the #1 CP poster, and I will be writing his roast either tomorrow or the next day. Rain Man is a dickbag who once set me on ****ing fire, and he is not the #1 poster on Chiefs Planet.

Now go kill yourselves. Happy Kwanzaa, assholes.

Who knew SNR had such an underlying hate for Rain Man. All he did was set you on fire, dude. Jeez....not a big deal if you ask me.

Going to bed with a smile on my face.

http://www.giantfreakinrobot.com/wp-...ker_awakes.jpg

I've pursued this vendetta against Rain Man for more than 10 years, lying in wait for the perfect moment to wreak my revenge for the B29 simulation. I even put up with moving to that awful part of Alabama and getting ****ed over in all of his other simulations. But I couldn't ever reveal my hand.

The moment finally arrived when I volunteered to take over a few roasts for htismaqe. I knew that this was my path to emotional closure and healing.

The deed is done. I was set on fire, but I live on with the satisfaction that I denied Rain Man a very important trophy to put in his case. And it wasn't due to circumstance or nature, either. I did it. I am the one action. I am the force.

I'm Hedda Gabler. I'm Keyser Söze. I'm the ultimate cock block.

But seriously, Rain Man's really cool. However, I explained that these rankings are all about one thing: content. And there is not one poster on this forum who generates as much content of such high quality as Clay. If you like him, you perk up every time you see something that he's written. If you hate him, he lives inside your head. Whether you cheer his victories or cheer his defeats, Clay IS Chiefs Planet.

And that is something that Rain Man is not. Let that not be an insult to him. The vendetta thing was just a joke post.

(But seriously... SET ON FIRE?)

Alabama's nice! There's nothing wrong with Alabama.

You're white, right?

That's pretty much what I said about Clay in your prediction thread.

So, it came down to the Agitator vs. the Entertainer?

When I see Clay has responded to a post my anus clenches.
When I see Rain Man has responded I'm intrigued.

Each will, generally, inspire further responses.

While I don't believe content can be derived by post count, both posters have exemplified the ability to engage the masses of this forum in a wide variety of discussion and that's the whole point of this silly planet.

The bottom-line is that Rain Man shouldn't have set SNR on fire 10 years ago.

Clay is number 1 because 99% of this forum's posters are too stupid to ignore his trolling.

The only logical argument for Clay being number 1 is he would be above you.

That's literally all I have.

SNR and Rainman going back and forth set my day off just right. I'm cracking the **** up. I love you guys. ROFL

This just got awesome.

If you weren't such a n00b you wouldn't

I might get this done tonight. It's long. I might make it into a two-part roast.

Just be patient. It's coming.

Would be pretty comical to find out #1 is some slapdick and Clay was left off the list altogether.

Trolling the ultimate troll.

Gotta hand it to Clay. He is witty, funny and his videos are awesome (I hope you make a Justin Houston video of this season).

His threads are almost always hilarious too. This is by far the best one I've read of his, though I wonder how much time he has on his hands.

http://www.chiefsplanet.com/BB/showthread.php?t=261629

I would say Clay for #1 UNTIL last week when he posted a full size picture of his turd with no spoiler! WTF??? :spock:

I remember I stayed up all night researching and writing that post. Zach immediately chimed in with his little fatbitchboy comments and I wanted to kill him.

3 years later he's still fat and Cassel was roasted on an open spit.

#WINNING

This list has been entertaining-whats the next time killer-the top 100 that didn't make the list? It will be fun to look back on- in say... 40 or 50 years.

:clap: Yep still funny!!

chiefs4me made the list?

add an asterik to this thread.

Who's getting the dick pics? Black bob has been trolling around...

I know I'm late to the party but I just got news of SNR in the burn unit. Anyone know how he's doing???

He died.

Rain man did it

Checking in.

I'm pretty sure there's a delay because of obvious abnormalities in the ranking. He's probably doing a recount so he can issue a corrected list before I release my "What type of animal are you trapped in a cage with" simulation.

gblowfish should definitely be higher on the list.

Are your variables restricted to non-mythical animals? I don't think there's any animal out there that can start me on fire.

Maybe if you hook up enough electric eels in series. Or otherwise, there's always the fallback of fire ants.

I want to interrupt this wankfest by professing my love for Rain Man. I don't care for most of his threads but I adore his razor sharp wit and he has been overly kind to me in years past when I needed it.

He's a good man, in my humble estimation.

HE'S MINE BITCH

Have you MET ME.

But ... I am my threads.

Like these threads?

http://ts4.mm.bing.net/th?id=HN.6080...373363&pid=1.7

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedi...eder_Piano.png


Over. Rated. cha cha chachacha

Where did you get that picture of raised on rats?

you gonna meet me in a dark ****ing alley if you keep up this OT bullshit

You are NOT your suit. You're the man who wears your suit.

Oh, so you think darkness is your ally?

You merely adopted the dark, mother****er.

Kinda looks like Dante Hall.

Who are we, really? We are but words on a screen. We have transcended our mortal souls and live in the ether, mere passels of electrons roaming the world, seeking the eyes that will recreate us. We cannot be deciphered. We cannot be judged.

We can be roasted, however. And SNR is our destiny.

Bowser is the reason they made a sequel to Grown Ups.

So.

Anybody suck any dick recently?

Asking for a friend.

So...the poster best known for slicing and dicing True Fans gets the ultimate True Fan "roast" treatment. Nice. I'm sure that if a mod did the appropriate digging, we'd see SNR repping a shit ton of Hamas's posts when he's authored nothing but an emoticon.

It's cool. No problem. I love seeing daddy issues play out over cyberspace. Somewhere earlier this year, I have no doubt that SNR was whispering, "...if only I could be your runaway teen."

Who knew that SNR stood for Salivating for Nutritious Ropes?

Is that good? That's good, right?

DEEZNUTZ OUT OF ****ING NOWHERE

http://stream1.gifsoup.com/webroot/a.../1069199_o.gif

Wow, that's filthy even for my standards.

Nice.:thumb:

Hey, **** you!

http://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/grow.../?search=Grown u

Why is it in chick flicks, people are always at fancy parties where people ring on their glass with a fork?

That's ****ing irritating. Do people actually go to these parties?

ROFL

ROFL

ROFL

How else will you get people to hear your toast?

Ambien is trippy as shit. That's all I have to say.

This post makes Jesus nervous, because you nailed it.

Our little Einstein has come a long ways from his days of race riots as Black Jack Sausage or bags of dog shit as the Matrix and overuse of 6 syllable words. Mr Feeny has matured into a reasonable poster capable of formulating contributions without including 17th century literature quotes into poop threads just to prove he's read some books since the Little House series.

I'm guessing that only happens at weddings and super high society crap, but those kinds of parties are part of girl fantasies.

Meanwhile, Iowanian puts his responses to quotes ABOVE THE ****ING QUOTES for the 14th year in a row.

Please take all my rep. Take it all.

I don't think so, but neon macaws lap the moon as glowing fascists enter Finland.

I'm gonna be honest. I feel like I was snubbed out of a top 101 spot. I know I'm not the most knowledgeable poster, or the funniest poster, but I have my moments. I enjoy learning from some of the great football and baseball minds on this board. I love you guys.

There was this one scene in one film where everybody just starts doing it and the female lead is like "that means they want us to kiss."

WTF. That is NOT a real thing. That is something a shitty screenwriter invented because they aren't talented enough to generate a genuine moment.

Did anyone else get a boner reading this? Asking for a friend.

If you want to be part of a girl fantasy, you have to be willing to tap that glass.

Why don't you eat a couple of servings of cheap Indian food, attend a hot yoga class with no pants on, position yourself into "happy baby" and erupt like Mt Vesuvius into your yapping trap if you don't enjoy my formatting, steve twerkle.

You're probably #1.

You're on my 101 list in three different spots.

Your #2 poster, ladies and gentlemen!